By the time Eon Jin stepped out of the shower, the final song in her classical music playlist had already reached its end. She wrapped herself in a white terry cloth robe, her hair in a towel of the same fabric, then picked up her phone that was resting on top of her vanity.
She checked the recommended songs by the app, but decided to search for an album she usually played whenever she felt the exhaustion of her daily chores as a mortal and a quasi-deity kicking in. In no time, a modern instrumental subtly filled the confines of her bedroom. The song was aptly titled “Belonging” from an Irish-Norwegian band called Secret Garden.
She sat in front of her vanity and stared at her reflection in her mirror as she dried her hair gently with a towel. So many years passed, but aside from the faint lines at the corners of her eyes and her mouth, not another wrinkle was added to her fair, diamond-shaped face. Her hair was always the same dark brown color, which she never bothered to treat or style based on the ever-changing fad. There were very few touches of gray nestled in the voluminous locks, but apart from those, not a single strand turned silver in the past three hundred and seventeen years.
It was during these moments of solitude, with no choice but to be confronted with her realities, that she felt somehow still wanting to be like the others around her. She wanted creases on her face to gradually show, her hair to turn gray one strand at a time, her skin to slowly lose the plumpness from her youth — all to prove that her time was finally passing by again.
Instead, she was frozen at the age of thirty. There was no moving forward and no turning back, unlike the mortals around her whose fate was to come and go.
The song ended and she once again resigned to the fact that because of the unusual circumstances she got herself in, she was perpetually an outcast. To wish for a sense of belongingness was already out of the question.
It was a quarter past nine when she finished her evening rituals. Knowing that sleep would not come to her anytime soon, she decided to open a fresh bottle of wine to relax. She poured the Pinot Grigio to a tall goblet, then picked it up by the stem to gently swirl the white wine, allowing it to open up. She took a sip of the fruity, alcoholic drink and was instantly reminded of azure skies, beaming sunlight, and a picturesque meadow filled with flowers in full bloom.
She settled herself on the taupe chaise lounge facing the ceiling-to-floor windows of her living room, the flowing, full circle sweep of her black nightgown made of chiffon and silk draping on the side, while she replayed the recent conversation she had with Tae Pyung in her mind.
“To me, it’s like a déjà vu,” he told her while they drove back to the station. “It’s like I’ve already lived through those moments, although I have been seeing or hearing them for the first time.”
Eon Jin rested her elbows on the car’s windowsill, her finger tapping on her lips as she listened to Tae Pyung’s explanation.
“Those are definitely not memories,” Tae Pyung told her. “It felt like I was in the past, and we’re talking centuries ago.”
Eon Jin nodded in understanding. Of course, it can be fragments of a different lifetime. But it was not his current self’s memories; it was hers.
The question was why she was in his moments of déjà vu.
“Do you believe in reincarnations?” he asked her as they stopped at an intersection after the traffic light turned red.
“I do,” she replied. “Are you under the impression that we knew each other in a different lifetime?”
“Looks like it,” he sighed. “It even feels like it.”
“What do you mean?”
Tae Pyung closed his eyes and tilted his face upwards, the back of his head resting on the cushion of the driver’s seat, as he reflected on his experience.
“It just felt so real,” he told her as he opened his eyes a few seconds later. “I felt every sensation, every emotion in that moment. It was almost overwhelming that everything seemed familiar when it shouldn’t be.”
The light switched to green, prompting Tae Pyung to put the gear to Drive and turn left with caution.
“That’s probably why I keep being drawn into you,” he mused.
Eon Jin hissed at his admission.
“Hey, Officer Kim,” she snapped at him while keeping her eyes on the road ahead of them, avoiding being caught just in case he would turn to look at her. “Don’t make it awkward between us.”
“We agreed to be honest with each other,” Tae Pyung reminded her.
“Yes, we did,” she concurred. “However, you can’t let these acquired emotions get in the way of our quest to find the answers.”
“I think it’s consequential to whatever it is that’s happening,” he said, justifying his statement. “I don’t intend to act on it, if you must know. But if it leads to that, then I guess it’s something we have no control over.”
“Fine,” she surrendered, knowing that they had reached an impasse in their argument. “Have it your way, then. Just don’t go begging on your knees one day, saying I broke your heart.”
“Would you, though?” he teased, shamelessly grinning with his dimples on full display as usual.
Eon Jin took a quick sidelong glance at him, her lips forming into a pout.
I would even if I do not intend to, Kim Tae Pyung, and you’d hate me for it, she wanted to tell him.
“Going back…” she deflected moments later. “Déjà vu, you said? Does it mean that there are no specific triggers to this phenomenon?”
“I suppose so,” he said. “From what I’ve read, déjà vus occur at random… briefly, and without warning.”
Tae Pyung made another turn, entering the street where the police station was located.
“Here’s how I see it,” he deduced. “What if these déjà vus are like pieces of a puzzle that we have to collectively reflect on before we see the big picture?”
“Then I guess we’ll have to wait for the rest of the pieces to reveal themselves in due course,” she murmured. “I just don’t think I have enough patience to see it through.”
“By the way, why does it seem like it’s very important for you to figure this thing out?” he asked her as they entered the gates of the police station.
“Is it not important to you, Officer Kim?”
Tae Pyung pulled over as soon as they arrived at the drop-off area, but made no movement to alight the vehicle yet. He gave ample consideration to Eon Jin’s question for a short while, his eyes narrow and brows knit together as he got momentarily lost in his thoughts.
“It is important to me,” Tae Pyung affirmed. “Of course, I want to know why all of these things are happening and what it means to me. Yet with you” — he turned to look at her — “why do I have a feeling that there’s so much more at stake other than satisfying your curiosity or being able to fully understand the underlying message here?”
She wanted to tell him that his déjà vus were the keys to unlocking her memories from her time as a mortal because she was not able to recall anything beyond that night the god punished her. And that the bigger picture he was talking about was for her to discover who she really was outside the mistress persona.
Instead, Eon Jin pursed her lips while she kept her eyes focused on the view outside, observing the people who were going to and fro, walking in front and past her car. She was supposed to deny it, but then remembered her end of the bargain, the promise she made just almost an hour ago.
“Indeed, there is, Officer Kim.”
As if on cue, Eon Jin’s phone that was perched on top of the side table rang, pulling her back to reality.
“What can I do for you, Officer Kim?” she asked Tae Pyung as soon as she swiped to answer.
Good evening, CEO Son , he said a little too cheerfully although in a hushed tone.
“What’s with that voice?”
We’re in a stakeout, remember? he reminded her.
“Ah, yes,” she said. “Where are you right now?”
Downtown, at a street near Kang Myeong Suk’s hideout.
“Is Kang Myeong Suk the cousin of the dead man at the river?” she asked, although she already knew the answer.
I shouldn’t be telling you this , he hesitated. But yes, he is.
Eon Jin took a swig of the remaining wine in her glass.
Anyway, I just wanted to ask if I left my jacket in your car.
“Not that I’m aware of,” she replied while trying to remember if she had noticed it in the backseat when she parked her car a few hours ago.
Hmmm... I wonder if I’d left it somewhere , he mumbled. She was able to make out from the sounds that he was probably searching for it wherever he was at that moment.
“I’ll go check tomorrow morning,” she sighed as she stood up to go back to the kitchen and get some more wine. “Seriously, though. Did you deliberately leave it in my car?”
Why would I? he contended. It’s too cold for me to leave it behind.
Eon Jin hissed at him as she poured herself another glass.
“Are you out on your own?” she asked after taking a sip, keeping her tone transactional.
Nope. I’m actually camping out here with Kyung Won. He’s part of my team, he said.
Eon Jin heard someone say ‘hello there’ in the background, which was followed by an ‘ouch’.
“Hey, Officer Kim,” she reprimanded him, holding back a chuckle. “Did you just hit the person you’re with? That was not very nice of you.”
But I did not hit him , Tae Pyung grumbled.
“Hey. Be good to Kyung Won,” she ordered him. “At least he’s there to make sure you don’t do anything stupid.”
Eon Jin went back to sit on her chaise lounge and placed the goblet on the coffee table beside it, stretching her limbs as she slowly reclined.
Anyhow, why are you still up? Tae Pyung asked.
“I’m having some wine,” she told him.
On a weeknight?
“Why not?”
Don’t drink too much.
“I’ll drink my fill,” she shrugged, then downed the glass in three seconds.
While we’re at it... Would you like to grab a drink some time? he asked in a casual manner. Who knows? Another piece of the puzzle might show up.
Eon Jin paused to think, her eyes staring at the empty goblet in her hand.
What do you say? he followed up when she did not answer. Does a night of soju and barbecue sound good? We can also go to a karaoke bar, if you like.
Eon Jin let out a hearty laugh despite herself, realizing that the alcohol was probably starting to take over.
Okay. I’ll take that as a ‘yes’ , he told her, his tone teasing.
“Suit yourself, Officer Kim,” she conceded. “I would probably forget about this whole conversation in the morning anyway.”
She swung her legs to the side of the chair, ready to rise to her feet, only to be startled when she saw Hyo Jin standing by the table beside her. In that very moment, another foreboding flashed in her mind. It was so grim that it actually made her flinch.
What is it, Son Eon Jin? Tae Pyung asked when he heard her gasp.
“It’s nothing,” she assured him, although her voice was saying otherwise. “Let me take a rain check on that soju night plan of yours.”
She hung up almost immediately to turn to the woman in black standing next to her.
“You know that I could use some heads up, Hyo Jin,” she sternly told the grim reaper. “I don’t like to do things on short notice.”
“Likewise, my dear mistress,” Hyo Jin told her, somewhat taken aback by her foul mood.
Eon Jin ran her palm down her face, then settled to cover her mouth as she tried to get a grip after that gruesome vision.
“If I knew that this case would be coming up, I would have postponed wine night until tomorrow,” she told Hyo Jin as she stood up and grabbed her coat that sprawled on the couch, then took hurried strides towards the door. Hyo Jin followed suit and quickly fell into step with her.
By the time the elevator reached the basement, Eon Jin had already changed using her magic, trading the elegance of her nightwear for a grandiose white chiffon cape-overlay jumpsuit with matching white stilettos and a blood red, wide brimmed hat.
“Pray tell, Eon Jin, what did you see in that vision that soured your temper this much?” Hyo Jin asked as soon as they hit the freeway.
“Let’s just say that this case is going to be pretty messy. You probably need to ask for backup so we can wrap things up before sunrise,” she told Hyo Jin as her foot stepped hard on the gas.
Photo by Ilyuza Mingazova on Unsplash
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