"I hope you're doing well."

This is what Hengci wishes he had said to him.

Not...

"I can get us a room."

But then he meant that as well.

Most importantly though, what he wishes he could have said is ...

"I've missed you."

"And I've waited to see you again, for so long."

He recalls his words to the woman from earlier. "Maybe I am doomed to wait forever?"

He feels despondent because never has it more clearly dawned on him than at this moment, that perhaps those words are the truth.

The night continues on, and even gets busier and he does his very best to dull his awareness of Xu Wen's presence in the room. He finds however that this causes his yearning to rage even harder.

Time and time again, his gaze goes to that table, and despite the endless trickle of people hell-bent on obstructing his view, he is able to catch a smile, a nod, and the unhurried movement of Laoshi's lips as he converses.

"Who was that man you let touch your ear?" one of the waitresses, Suyin asks. "Wasn’t that stepping out of line?"

Hengci's throat tightens. "I know him."

"Oh," her eyes widen from behind her glasses. "You do? How?"

"I need to go to the restroom," he says. "Can you cover for me?"

"S-sure," she agrees, and Hengci escapes for the hills.

In there, he stands before the mirror once again with his head hung low. His body is thrumming with bitter frustration, and he doesn't know for how much longer he can contain this.

He feels jittery and unstable because the time is ticking away, and certainly, Xu Wen will soon take his leave and be on his way. Perhaps and truly, forever, this time.

He releases a deep, shuddering breath and turns the tap on. He cannot however carelessly splash water on his face as this will leave him an unkempt, dripping mess.

So he simply wets his hand, and begins to press it against his overheated skin.

The door swings open then and he startles.

It is time to return, so he shuts the tap off and heads to the dispenser for a paper towel.

He turns around... and his legs cease to function.

"L-laoshi," he calls out of habit, stunned.

Xu Wen has both hands in his pockets, and his gaze is as hard as nails.

Hengci wonders who is currently standing before him; the free-spirited teacher that always wanted him to do well, or the distant, intimidating stranger he'd been frequently wary of.

"You haven't changed your bad habit of taunting me," Xu Wen says, and although his voice is low, the sound seems to ricochets off the walls and through Hengci's soul.

Hengci's hands lower to his sides. "I have never taunted you."

They stare at each other.

"Why are you working in a bar at twenty-five?" Xu Wen asks. "Do you have another job?"

Anger lights Hengci up like a furnace. "Why is this your business?"

Xu Wen's smile is dry. "You know what they say; once a teacher always a teacher."

Hengci honestly cannot stand him, so he returns his attention to wiping his hands.

"What do you want?" he growls.

Xu Wen shrugs. "Nothing. I just came to the bathroom."

"Teachers follow their students to the bathroom too?"

Hengci's gaze lifts and glares.

Xu Wen doesn't respond, but doesn't look away either so Hengci scoffs, the memory dangling between them. "It wouldn't be the first time anyway."

The used paper towel is tossed away, and he begins to head towards the door. His hand closes around the handle, but even when he presses down he finds that he is unable to leave.

He exhales, and then asks, quietly. "How is your life without me?"

Xu Wen turns, taking in his flushed face and chestnut brown hair, arranged in layered, messy waves down his temples.

"Uneventful," he replies. "And how is yours without me?"

"Hell," Hengci doesn't bother with holding back.

Silence.

"Still in love?"

Hengci turns around, his gaze malignant.

"Unfortunately."

Xu Wen sighs. "That is unfortunate. There are better people out there you know?"

Hengci smirks. "None quite as handsome as you."

Xu Wen's smile is fond. "You're the most handsome,"

Hengci returns to him without any hesitation and holds his ground, their faces so close that he can trace the glints of light in Xu Wen's eyes.

"And you're the one that always taunts me."

He hears the sharp catch of Xu Wen's breath, and lets out a smile.

Then he lifts his hand and Xu Wen's gaze goes to it. But Hengci is undaunted, and proceeds until the hand boldly wraps around the side of Xu Wen's neck.

He cocks his head, and stares even harder into the dark, arresting pools of Xu Wen's eyes.

"Bold," Xu Wen says, and Hengci blinks.

"When haven't I been?"

Xu Wen smiles, but it is so sad that Hengci's heart aches.

"I've missed you," Xu Wen breathes, but these words are too bitter and yet too sweet for Hengci to swallow.

He searches Xu Wen's eyes, but then they shift away as Xu's Wen's hand lifts to stroke a lock of hair away from Hengci's brow.

"Tell me," he says, his voice softer than Hengci has ever heard it. "What's happening with you? Do you only work here? I really want to know."

"And what if I do?"

Xu Wen smiles again, and still, it doesn't reach his eyes. "You're still not rid of your habit of responding to my questions with questions."

Hengci shrugs, and strokes the edge of his thumb across Xu Wen's pulse. His wrist is grabbed as a result and his hand, pulled away.

"Answer me," Xu Wen groans, low and menacing, and Hengci hardens.

"I only work here."

Xu Wen seems stumped. "Why?"

"What do you mean- why? It's a job."

Xu Wen studies him. "You- do you enjoy it? At least?"

"Do you enjoy what you do? Whatever that is right now?"

Xu Wen smiles. "I'm doing alright."

"Then I'm doing alright too."

Xu Wen stares, and then his gaze lowers... to Hengci's lips. Hengci watches... and dares him, the most familiar with that inner battle that Xu Wen has always fought with himself before giving in to kiss him. The first time, this battle had taken months. The second time, weeks, and then days, because of course Xu Wen had to be battered down by his conscience, subdue it and then be tortured by the wanton need all over again.

Today, however, he turns around and walks away.

"How long is it going to take this time around?" Hengci calls after him, and the door swings shut.

"Coward," he spits, barely able to catch his breath.

He wants to hit someone... or something, but settles simply for returning to the sink.

This time, he drenches his entire face with water.

>>>>>>><<<<<<<

Hengci returns to the bar with shaky legs.

His bangs are damp and clumped, and his mood immensely dark.

"Wu Shen is here," Yin Qi informs him. "He's in Laoban's office. I'm sure he threatened to fire him otherwise he'd never have bothered coming in this late into a shift."

Hengci is even more aggravated.

He shuts his eyes as he tries to reign in the discord of emotions clamoring within him, and Yin Qi goes quiet.

"A-are you alright?" the cautious inquiry comes. "You’ve been on edge tonight. Did anything bad happen?"

Hengci opens his eyes, and glares across the room.

He'd never truly held back from staring outrightly at Xu Wen. At first, he'd just been curious about him, but then gradually, he'd become entertained. This eventually grew into an absorbing fascination, and then morphed into a torrid attraction that finally had him looking away. It burned his guts to ashes, and left his eyes shifty and lowered whenever this seemingly simple, but yet mysterious teacher came into his vicinity.

Xu Wen on the other hand, didn't seem to have ever bothered to look at him, but yet he'd been able to see him, more than anyone else ever had.

Hengci wonders if this is the case now as his eyes bore into the man that although quiet in the midst of his excited and fairly drunk company, appears politely engaged. Hengci wonders what is currently going through his mind, and if he is aware that he is being watched.

He doubts that even if he is aware, he would care very much. Perhaps he would be amused by Hengci, and even sympathetic, but never affected enough to be as responsive as Hengci has always wanted him to be.

With Xu Wen, he has almost always felt like an indulgence- something to care of... to soothe... and to be thrilled by from time to time, but then never taken too seriously.

Just like a pet.

Back then, Hengci had yielded because Xu Wen was his teacher.

But now...

He doesn't see why it should continue to be the case.

Hengci admits that he is ensnared, and he wants to be set free. Truly set free. but he doesn’t know how and it fills him with frustration.

He straightens, and begins to walk away from the counter.

"Excuse me-" a patron calls out, but he ignores it.

"Hengci," he hears Yin Qi's surprised call.

"Get Wu Shen," he replies. "I'm taking a break."

"What?"

He weaves his way through those standing and chatting, and soon arrives at the table with the party on six.

Their chatter immediately falters at the sudden intrusion, but to Hengci, nothing and no one else might have as well existed because his focus is entirely on the startled man before him.

"I want to talk to you," he says.

Xu Wen looks at him, and then glances at his friends.

"I'll come over before I leave."

"No," Hengci refuses. "I want to talk to you now."

One of Xu Wen's friends mouths something to him, and Xu Wen responds with a wide but tight smile. "I do," he replies. "It's fine."

"Hengci," his attention returns. "Later, please."

"I'll just ask you right here then."

Xu Wen's smile slowly disappears. He glares at Hengci, and then turns to his friends. "Excuse me," he says, and rises to his feet. Hengci follows, and soon they are huddled in a dim, obscure corner in the hotel's lobby.

A tall plant shields them, but it still isn't too difficult for passersby to clearly make out the suited man, leaning against the wall with his arms folded, and the bartender, with his sleeves, rolled up his elbows and both hands hidden in the pockets of his pants.

"What is this?" Xu Wen asks, his voice distant and cold.

Hengci is equally defensive and withdrawn.

"I want to get over you."

Xu Wen looks confused. "Is that why you called me away?"

Hengci swallows as he realizes that this is inane behavior.

"Leave," he tells Xu Wen. "Right now. I can't stand the fact that you're here."

"I didn't come here because of you."

"But you're here ... now," Hengci is barely able to stop himself from yelling. "You're fucking here and... this is … this is my space. This is my part of the world. So leave."

Xu Wen watches him for a few seconds, and then he sighs.

"You're still so immature," he says, and Hengci is incensed.

"Watch your mouth. I'm not your student anymore."

"So why are you acting like you still are? We haven't seen each other in seven years. We're basically strangers now. So you have no right to barge in the way you just did."

He is right. Completely... but yet Hengci doesn’t know how to accept this.

'Get a divorce,' he wants to say. 'You never wanted her anyway. This is all my fucking fault.'

His head lowers. "We won't see each other again after tonight will we?"

It takes a long time before Xu Wen responds. "Who knows? Maybe in another seven years."

His throat closes up but he still manages to say what he truly wants to. "I hope you're happy. I want you to be happy. I truly do."

He takes a step back. "I'm sorry. I was out of line."

He turns around to leave...

But then a hand bunches around the back of his waistcoat.

His heart jumps into his throat.

"I'm not happy," he hears the quiet words.

Hengci is startled, but all he can do is stare ahead, eyes wide and damp.

"But I want to be. I desperately want to be."