Annette ran their polished fingers across the thick spines of the many volumes lining the tall shelves in Mad Hat’s office, then they perused the crinkled papers scattered across his large wooden desk.
“Quite the history buff…” Annette muttered. “Hmm, here we go…” They picked up a large book opened halfway.
THE RED KING’S DREAM
A world beyond ours of which you cannot conceive,
Filled with all manner of wonders you cannot believe.
To be of both worlds, a union you must achieve,
With the face of the Queen, a King’s crown you’ll receive.
The one true son will take the throne,
Though he cannot walk the path alone.
An orphaned boy who is all grown,
Will find the one with whom his fate is sewn.
“Another world? Is that where this Dinah is from?” Annette mused. “And the Prince wants to rule them both, I assume. He must think he’s the orphan.” They leafed through the rest of the book, examining the notes scribbled in the margins. “How increasingly curious. I think I need to have a talk with this Dinah.”
Beatrice awoke to the sounds of birds chirping, the sight of a forest around her, the feel of aches in her muscles, and the smell of breakfast being made.
“Morning, Pumpkin. Hungry?”
She rolled over to see Mad Hat sitting next to a fresh fire holding a skillet and a large spoon.
“Starving! I haven’t eaten since…” she trailed off sadly.
“How would you like your eggs this morning?”
“Unfertilized,” she said through a yawn.
“Excuse me?”
“Like they don’t have any baby bird fetuses in them.”
He laughed. “Just what kind of eggs do you have where you’re from?”
“What kind of eggs do you have here?”
“Scrambled. I also found some fresh oysters.”
“Oysters for breakfast?”
He nodded as he sprinkled in some seasoning, then, without warning he gave a violent sneeze. “Sorry,” he apologized hastily with a flinch.
“Bless you.”
“What?”
Thinking he didn’t hear, she enunciated better. “I said ‘Bless you’!”
“Why?”
“‘Cause you sneezed. What do you say after a sneeze?”
“I say sorry and beg my nanny not to beat me.”
“Oh, well you must have had a wonderful childhood.”
“Not really,” he conceded, missing her sarcasm yet again. “She thought I only did it to bother her.”
“What about your parents?”
“I lost them both when I was young. We should get moving soon. The Prince probably has all his men and their horses looking for you, and he’s probably wondering where I got to.”
“Mmm, this is delicious,” Beatrice remarked of her breakfast as the impromptu chef began packing up all of their stuff back into his hat.
A little while later they were picking their way through the dense woods again, sunlight trickling down through the treetops. Beatrice pushed aside a thin branch, carefully choosing her steps after the previous day’s mishap.
“So you guys don’t have movies here?” She had been attempting to fill the silence with idle chitchat.
“I still don’t fully understand the concept of them.”
“Well, if you did you wouldn’t have to wish you were Tom Sawyer or anybody.”
“Who?”
“Just one of the billions of characters you can vicariously have adventures through. I mean I guess that was a book first - bad example. Then again maybe I should just be telling you to read more. But you did have all those books in your office…”
“And this Tom guy lives in your world? He has adventures for you?”
“He’s not real. But yeah, his adventures are for the reader’s benefit.”
“What do you mean he’s not real? He’s done stuff hasn’t he? How can someone who’s not real go places and do things?”
“You guys don’t have fictional stories either? What about that whole library back at the club?”“They are all about real things.”
“Well, that’s boring...”
“If something’s real that means it’s boring?”
“No, I just meant... it’s good to have an imagination, you know. Although, I guess half of history is made up.”
“Stop.”
“Sorry,” she said automatically.
“No, I mean stop walking.”
Beatrice, who was still looking carefully down at her feet and the uneven ground, now looked up. A giant hedge (no hog in sight) towered before them, spreading out in either direction as far as she could see.“It’s the Labyrinth,” Mad Hat breathed.
“Like David Bowie dancing around with creepy puppets, Labyrinth?”
“I don’t understand the reference.”
“Yeah, yeah... You know I’ve never heard of one of these things that was actually good for you. They all have a Minotaur, sphinx, giant spider or, well, a glittery rock star and some trolls - goblins? …anyway, whatever - hidden in them.”“We’re going to have to go through it.”
“Of course you’d say that.”
“It would take days to walk around it.”
“It looks like it would take days to walk through it.”
“Perhaps,” Mad Hat conceded, “but we can’t go over or under it either.”
“Well, I heard that if you keep one hand against a wall and just follow it around you’ll eventually come out the other side.”
“Alright, let’s try it.”
“It’ll probably take quite a bit longer that way,” Beatrice warned, although it was her idea.“And even longer if we get lost in it.”
“Ok, let’s do this then, and hope we don’t run into anything too weird.” Beatrice paused. “Who am I kidding,” she sighed deeply. “Things will definitely get weird.”
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