Chapter 8: My bias’ coworker, Kudo Shigeru, and his “30” insecurity 

Unfamiliar buildings appeared in my field of vision.

“Should I message my bias and tell me that I got abducted by his friend in case something happens?” I thought as I opened the message app.

“But this is weird…” Kudo Shigeru suddenly said and I shifted my attention to him. “Tooru-san definitely said that his future daughter was a fan of our group… And you were definitely way cuter when we first met.”

He glanced at me from the rear-view mirror, making a brief moment of eye contact with me, startling me in that instant. 

“Why are you now acting colder than before?” He pouted.

“Mmmh…” I thought for a second. It was true that I didn’t feel as excited as when I first met him. 

“Probably because I got recently used to living with my bias?” I unsurely said. “Compared to living with my bias, talking to you doesn’t feel like it’s a big deal now.”

“What?! Tooru-san is really your bias?!” He shouted. “I thought for sure he said that because he didn’t want us to know that his future daughter’s favorite was one of us. But to think that he was telling the truth…”

As Kudo Shigeru was lost in his thoughts, I quickly took this opportunity to send a message to Hifumi Tooru.

“I see.. Well, if you were to live with your bias for a few months, of course you’ll feel nothing for the other members…” He quietly said and he suddenly looked like a lost puppy, making me feel bad that I made my idol sad. 

“... It’s not like I don’t like you”, I reassured him, blushing in the process. 

“Ugh! I sound like a tsundere!” I cringed from embarrassment. 

He instantly brightened up and started complimenting himself. 

“I know, right?! I’m not so bad if I do say so!” He exclaimed. “I routinely take good care of my skin and I make sure to restrict what I eat and work-out to keep in shape. I may be 30 years old this year, but a lot of people say that I still look like I'm in my mid-twenties!”

He desperately tried to convince me that he was handsome despite being 30 years old.

“Is he worried about his appearance now that he hit the 30 mark?!” I thought, surprised that he felt this way.

“Don’t worry! You may be an old man but you’re a handsome old man!” I tried to cheer him up but he only got more blue.

“Ah, yes… I’m officially an old man now… Ha ha”, he halfheartedly laughed.

“Ugh- That didn’t help him! Instead I made him feel worse!” I tried to think of another way to comfort him. “Isn’t it obvious that you're an old man to me? We’re 14 years apart, you know?”

“Ugh! I don’t think that sounded too comforting!” I beat myself up in my head for saying such an insensitive thing. 

“Then does that make Tooru-san an old man to you too?” He pouted.

“Of course! Since he’s going to be my future dad! Of course, he’s an old man!” I instantly exclaimed, hoping that Kudo Shigeru would feel better after hearing me say this. 

“... Then is Shouta an old man to you too?” He asked in tears.

I flinched. Nakatomi Shouta, the youngest member in HELIOS, was 29 years old and the only member that was still in his twenties. Kudo Shigeru asking me that question just proved to me that he was sensitive at being old. 

“Don't tell me that he jokes around just to appear more young?” I was in disbelief. “Hm? Was the talk about making mistakes when you’re young his way of saying that he wants to truly be young and not just because he wanted to complain about an adult’s responsibility?”

Kudo Shigeru kept looking at me like a lost puppy from the rear-view mirror, waiting for my answer. 

“Does he feel that insecure? Is it because of the pressure from the public? Maybe he regrets being in the entertainment industry? I hope that won’t affect HELIOS. I don’t want my favorite idol group to disband!” I selfishly started to think about my own desires until I remembered the question he asked me.

“Of course, Shou- Nakatomi-san is an old man”, I quickly said, hoping that I wasn’t lost in my thoughts for too long.

“... You sure took your time to say that”, he sulked. “Maybe you actually don’t feel that way-”

“Of course, I think he’s an old man! Any man that’s 12 years or more older than me is an old man to me!” I exclaimed, hoping that he’ll understand that I will consider a man in his twenties also as an old man.

“Umm.. I see… That doesn’t exactly make me happy but I see.. More than 12 years old, huh… I see… So that’s how you think… Mmh…” He murmured to himself. “Ok, then!”

I sighed in relief after seeing him be in a good mood again. Not even 10 minutes had passed and I felt like jumping out of the car. I desperately hoped that we would quickly arrive at Kudo Shigeru’s destination so that I could send the location to my future dad and ask him to pick me up.