I got up early, unable to go back to sleep when I remembered what happened last night. Even though Elizabeth’s voice was silent in my mind, I couldn’t keep her out of my own thoughts.
Those random thoughts that I heard, frazzled and flustered, as I was falling asleep, had made me feel so calm, so at peace, that I just had to wonder if that was the reason I had such a wonderful dream.
She had been there, at my side, as we walked, hand in hand. I couldn’t recall the words that were said, just her bright smile and the way it lit up everything around us. It was the kind of expression that used the whole face – puffed up cheeks, squinty eyes, big grin… it was the kind of smile that made you smile for no reason other than the way it put you completely at ease with every single thing in your life.
I was smiling just remembering it.
And, as I got ready for the day, the sun barely bringing light to the world, it seemed quiet. Too quiet.
It almost seemed a shame I couldn’t hear her thoughts while she dreamt too. Though, I supposed, that was a pretty big jump in lack of privacy.
Unless, there was something else to it.
Does it fade?
The sudden dread hit me, stopping me in my tracks.
Wait.
Dread?
What was I thinking?! No. Not dread. You shouldn’t dread such a thing, I tried to tell myself, even as I saw the reflection of my face as I held up my phone. I didn’t turn the screen on, but just kind of stared.
Shock?
Worry?
Fear?
I wasn’t sure how I felt about that look on my face. How would I even begin to describe that expression?
I ran a hand over my face and gazed at the notifications to distract myself. Sending a quick message back to my dads, I put the phone right back where it was and left, the door shutting with a light click behind me.
Now, it was time to work. I could think things over later.
It didn’t take long before I found the room Adam had shown me on the tour. The plans would be set up in here. I reached for the knob just as he emerged at the end of the hallway.
“Fallyn! Good morning.”
I nodded.
“Good morning.”
“We got a long day ahead of us.”
I gave him a smile.
“Let’s get to work.”
He clapped me on the shoulder with a huge grin.
“Let’s do it.”
He was right.
As we went over the plan for the day, I had a feeling we were going to be working at least until the sun was setting. Things needed to be prepped and hauled up, among other things. But I welcomed a small distraction like this, especially when I didn’t know what to do about the other problem…
Where I could hear her thoughts.
But growing wings and flying up past her window… I got a glimpse of her room again. And it wasn’t just that.
Elizabeth happened to be sleeping, sprawled out across the whole bed. Starfish style. I almost couldn’t contain a bit of laughter that bubbled up in me at the sight. It wasn’t to make fun. It was a happy kind of laugh, just feeling a rush of joy at something. In this case, it was the starfish version of Elizabeth – too cute to handle.
Eventually, one of the times I passed her window, she was no longer in the room, and something became incredibly clear to me about those thoughts of hers.
They had not faded.
Not at all.
I happened to know she was working in the kitchen today.
And that she was still freaking out over last night.
And that she thought about me a lot.
And she was reading something…
Of course, it was just little comments here and there that told me these things, but I appreciated the small glimpse into her life. I had to wonder though, how was it that I could hear her so often, when she hadn’t heard me at all? And as a result, I became incredibly conscious about my own thoughts.
I wasn’t quite sure what to do. This thing with Elizabeth… we hadn’t discussed it, and we never really specified anything about where this was headed.
There wasn’t a chance for me to talk with her throughout the whole day. Adam and I were late for dinner and lunch, so we ate alone. Together. And when I was finishing up, walking down the hallway, she was likely already in bed, her thoughts completely silent in my mind.
Feeling a little bit unsatisfied, I headed to bed, flopping down on the mattress after washing up.
I was getting too used to her voice, too fast.
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