Tim actually did it. He made a name for himself in the hero business.

Honestly, from the expression on their faces, his fellow henchmen were just as shocked as him. Of course, he wasn’t all that famous. Not a top-tier hero yet. But it was something, and it was definitely enough to make a good nemesis for Penny.  

It was also pretty neat to be talked about in the news for once. Even if it was just a short little segment that lasted about a minute. Tim would have commented on it if Penny hadn’t been sitting right next to him as they all gathered around the lounge’s T.V. All of them were staring intently at the screen, but Penny seemed particularly entranced. 

There was a gleam in her eyes, her lips curling up into a smile. For once, she actually looked like a villain, plotting her next attack. In short, she was definitely feeling better.

“Oh, he's perfect!” Penny said once the newscaster had switched to the heartwarming story of a child's reunion with her pet chinchilla. “The people love him.”

The people hardly knew Tim.

“He’s just good enough to get us some points, but still not too strong.”

Tim didn't really know what he was doing most of the time.

“Though his outfit’s kinda lame.”

Wow. Rude, Penny. Fucking rude.

“Still, I’m pretty sure I can beat him,” Penny actually sounded confident of that, Tim noted. He was only vaguely offended because that was kind of the point of the whole plan. 

It still didn’t do much to reassure Tim of his role on the next step of said plan. Mostly because, as much as Penny failed at being evil, she could actually be a challenge for a poor, regular guy like Tim. He sincerely hoped Lina had an idea of how to help Tim not get killed. As he had been for much of his life, Tim was sorely disappointed. 

Still, he had to give Lina points for keeping the plan simple.

Granted, wait on the roof and then make a dramatic entrance might have been a bit too simple. At least Tim had room to be creative. Even if he still had no idea what the hell he was going to do as he watched from a skylight as Penny and the others barged into the dark warehouse below. 

Sure, Lina had told him to make his entrance impressive, but it was hard to make that happen when all you had was some rope, an open skylight, and enough stupidity to be confused as brave. Tim figured he should at least give it a shot. 

And so, Tim gathered what little courage he had in preparation. His only hope was that Penny would appreciate the trouble he’d gone through if he ended up dying. A memorial or something would be nice.

While Tim was distracted with thoughts of how his friends would honor him after he kicked the bucket, he failed to notice the rather imposing figure dressed in brown and gray standing behind him, watching Tim intently and not without some curiosity. They stood there silently, barely having made a sound when they’d approached. That was pretty much why Tim nearly had a heart attack when said figure spoke.

“What are you doing?” 

Tim would forever deny having jumped. He would, however, admit to almost having fallen through the skylight if not for the hand that pulled him back. Once his poor heart had regained its usual rhythm, Tim turned and met the gaze of one of the most respected and idolized heroes around. Then he nearly had another heart attack.

It was not a good night for Tim’s poor heart. 

“Aren’t you the new guy?” Sparrow asked Tim again, her masked face appearing blatantly confused. 

“Oh, er, yes? I mean, yes, yes I am,” Tim said, and fought back the incredibly strong urge to facepalm when, for some reason, he made a terrible attempt at sounding heroic. He was pretty sure he just ended up sounding like a bulldog with a chest congestion. 

“Right, well nice to meet you,” Sparrow said, still looking at Tim like he was a weirdo. Which was actually a pretty accurate assessment. “What’s going on down there?” 

Without paying any further attention to Tim, Sparrow walked over to the skylight and peered down at where Penny and her lackeys were going about their villainous business. Tim almost wanted to cry at how much of a shitshow things were turning into. For a while, Tim’s internal screaming was enough to drown out whatever else Sparrow was saying. Or most of it, at least.

“I can handle this, if you’re okay with it.”

“No! I mean, no, that’s okay. It’s just some small-time crooks. I can totally handle it.” Tim inwardly cringed out how spectacularly he failed at playing it cool. 

For a second, Sparrow just stared at him. Tim couldn’t blame her. He’d question his sanity too. 

“And, how are you getting down there?” It was a sensible question. Tim desperately wished he had an equally sensible answer.

Maybe then he wouldn’t have found himself clinging to a young woman who could easily crush him under a single booted heel as they dropped to the warehouse floor. Tim consoled himself by reminding himself that at the very least he hadn’t screamed. 

He was also impressed when Penny and his friends didn’t scream either. If Tim hadn’t still been trying to calm the wild beating of his heart, he might have felt proud. At least until he realized that the only reason they hadn’t screamed was because they were frozen in fear. 

When he really got a good look at them he almost laughed. Vic and Ricky had stopped while attempting to carry away a large crate while Alex was checking the contents of another crate. Lina and Sam were standing by Penny—who was watching over everyone clad in her usual black, and gray and hot pink—and each and every one of them were wide eyed and a couple of shades paler than usual. 

There was only a moment of silence before all hell broke loose. Penny, surprisingly, was the first to act. Somehow, she managed to push through the awe she must have felt at having The Sparrow in front of her, and attacked. Or at least, she tried to. 

The thing about Penny—and something Tim really should have remembered before then—was that she actually had some pretty cool abilities. Mostly, she was somewhat telekinetic thanks to her mother, who was famous for having such complete control over her abilities that she could thread a needle from across the room with as much ease as she could crush a bus with little more than a thought. Penny didn’t have such astounding control.

That was why Tim wasn’t surprised when she managed to throw a single bottle of what was probably very expensive wine at him and Sparrow—and missed them by about six feet. Tim could have cried.

Everyone seemed to snap out of it at the sound of the bottle shattering on the concrete floor, its contents spilling and looking very much like blood beneath the light of the skylight. Sparrow took a step forward. Everyone began moving all at once while Tim had no fucking clue about what to do. 

Penny, bless her heart, was still trying to fight back through her panic, and through Lina clinging to her and telling her to save them while some sound that was suspiciously similar to sobbing could be heard from somewhere in the background. Somehow, miraculously, Penny managed to lift a heavy looking crate and directed it straight at Sparrow. 

Who punched right through it.

Oh, right, super strength, Tim thought as he watched the scene with morbid fascination.

The crate shattered along with its contents, scattering in seconds. Tim wasn’t even surprised when one of the many pieces that broke off, a particularly big one, shot straight to where Penny was. And promptly hit her right in the middle of the forehead. Penny was out in seconds.

Not for the first time that night, Tim felt like crying.

Judging by the looks on his friends’ faces, so did they. Lina, wonderful, clever, well prepared Lina, didn’t waste time as Sparrow was only a couple steps away. She stuck her hand into her pocket and tossed a couple smoke bombs at the hero, providing them with some cover. Tim could barely make out Sam tossing Penny over her shoulder and making a run for it along with the others before the smoke covered them completely. 

They’re not gonna make it, Tim thought, knowing they’d have to make it to their getaway vehicles and drive away before Sparrow caught them. That wasn’t very likely to happen. 

Taking advantage of the cover Lina had provided, Tim pulled out a couple of his own little tricks. He said a quick prayer, took aim, and tossed them straight at Sparrow’s feet just before he lost sight of her. Tim couldn’t see if it had worked through the smoke, and, for a moment, Tim was afraid they were screwed. 

He hurried over to where he thought Sparrow could be, and nearly ran right into her. Tim tried not to look too relieved when he saw her feet covered in the special adhesive one of the henchmen from R&D—it was Lenny, bless his nerdy little heart—had developed the previous year. From experience, Tim knew it to be as tough as concrete and stretchy enough that breaking it was a damn pain in the ass. Even Sparrow would have some trouble with it. 

“I’m fine, go after them!” Tim didn’t need to be told twice.

He ran to the exit and almost laughed at the sight of Sam shoving an unconscious Penny into the back of the van before getting in herself. Tim watched them speed away, busting through the chain link fence around the property, and disappearing down the road. 

When Tim got home that night, the first thing he did was laugh. Lina looked at him like he was crazy and honestly, Tim wouldn’t be surprised if the last bit of his frail sanity had vanished that night. Still, she waited patiently for him to calm down before questioning him.

“What the hell was Sparrow doing there?” Tim should have known that’d be her first question.

“I don’t know, she just showed up when I was about to go in. She’s actually pretty nice,” Tim said, adding the last bit as an afterthought. 

“Holy fuck, we almost got killed.” Lina dropped onto the couch, head in her hands and seemingly contemplating her mortality. Tim sat next to her, removing his mask and tossing it onto the coffee table.

“How’re Penny and the others?” he asked, wondering if they were still freaking out. 

“Well, we almost had a heart attack, but other than that we’re fine. Though Penny has a pretty impressive lump on her head right now.” 

“She did get hit pretty hard,” Tim said with a nod. 

They were quiet for a moment, both going over the crazy night they’d just had. It was all a bit surreal, to be honest. That was probably why Tim snorted and found himself laughing once more.

“I can’t believe we took down Sparrow,” he said between laughs. “Us!”

Despite it all, Lina couldn’t hold back her own laughter.

“I can’t believe Penny threw a wine bottle at Sparrow. And she missed!” Lina said, snickering. “Penny’s face was priceless.”

“You should have seen Sparrow’s face after I threw some adhesive pellets.” That was enough to send Lina into a whole new wave of laughter. 

As they sat there, laughing about their close call, Tim couldn’t help but think that maybe their plan wasn’t so stupid after all. Maybe things would work out for once.

Tim was an idiot.