Laryana still did not say anything.
While she might have agreed to help Ying Zhen, she still felt more
like an observer than anything else. She didn’t really see herself
as part of what was currently happening. He might have explained just
why he wanted to take her along, but it couldn’t change anything
about her feelings regarding this situation.
Ying Zhen realized that they had somehow reached an impasse. As a guest, it wasn’t on him to dispel the atmosphere though. After all, what was he supposed to say? He couldn’t tell them to just go on with whatever they had been doing since they were the ones who had invited to their wedding.
As such, he could only awkwardly continue the current conversation. “There aren’t in all of them but surely in some. She … is from close to Romallia.” He figured that this was the closest he could get to the truth without actually saying that she was from the underworld. And the latter was something that he absolutely couldn’t mention. Not in this place.
Even though this wasn’t real, he knew that it would influence way too much what was going on. And then, he would not be able to make sure of his regrets and move on. He simply did not have the time.
If this had merely been about him and not about saving the others, he would’ve delighted in the fact that he could say something like this. Yes, even though he might not want to admit it, part of what had irked him about Chun Hua’s wedding was the fact that he perceived it as a slight to himself. His ego had been bruised. He could admit that outright. Just the thought that she had preferred another man over him … he couldn’t deal with that too well.
Yes, maybe he had not asked her in time but if she had held any feelings toward him, surely, she would not have agreed to marry another man. Chun Hua had been an outspoken woman. He believed that if she had wanted to, she herself would have brought up the prospect of marriage to him, trying to see how he felt about the idea. Since she hadn’t, it meant that she had indeed preferred marrying this man over marrying him. It was a hard pill to swallow.
Now, coming here with a woman at his side who was not inferior to Chun Hua in any way meant saving quite a lot of face. No matter what others might have thought about his feelings for the bride before, nobody would dare to say anything with Laryana at his side, would they?
He turned to glance at her, feeling that whether it was her perceived status or her looks, she absolutely wasn’t lacking behind. No, instead, he had to say that if not for his emotional attachment to Chun Hua from the years they had spent together as friends, Laryana would be the one who would come out on top. Not that this was something he should think about.
He lightly furrowed his brows when he turned back, giving a smile. “Anyway, I hope it is alright that I brought her.”
Chun Hua faintly raised her brows, still not sure what to make of all of this. She had heard of Romallia. It was a place that was quite far away. The humans called it the capital of the world and once upon a time, when the high goods had still been reigning, it had also been a place they frequented. It was the kind of place that — even if you had never visited it — you would’ve heard of it at least once in your life.
But that didn’t mean that she knew anything else about it and she didn’t know what to say because of that. It also didn’t seem right to inquire considering that this was her wedding day. There were other guests to greet, other things to take care of. Still, she would have liked to know more.
She herself had also thought that Ying Zhen might be nourishing some feelings for her. He had never said it though so she had told herself that she must have imagined things and that there was nothing but pure friendship between them. And either way, she was happy with the man she was about to marry.
Still, her feelings were complicated. She hadn’t seen Ying Zhen in such a long time and hadn’t even had time to tell him beforehand that she would get married. As a friend, that wasn’t right. After all the time spent together before, they should have been closer than that. Ying Zhen should have known when she got engaged, he should have met her fiance long before the actual wedding date, and been invited in person by the two of them. In fact, she would have loved to see the two of them get along just as well as she and Ying Zhen always had.
But instead, she had only seen Ying Zhen again on the actual day of her wedding and those introductions had never happened. More than that, he even brought along a woman she didn’t know and while he might not have said it outright, watching the way those two looked at each other and interacted, their relationship should be close. She wouldn’t be surprised if she soon heard that Ying Zhen’s own wedding ceremony was being planned. It … made her feel awkward.
Chun Hua wasn’t so vain that she wanted to monopolize his feelings. She had found a man that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with and she would be more than happy if Ying Zhen was also able to find a woman to do the same. She had just never imagined it would be like this.
Suddenly, this man did not seem like her friend anymore but like a stranger. But maybe she should have expected that. After all, he had been gone for so long and he had undoubtedly seen many things in the war with the gods that were able to change a man. She couldn’t expect everything to go back to how it had been before. Even if it did, that would need time.
Well, today wasn’t an opportunity to catch up but there might be others soon enough. She could find out what had happened to Ying Zhen and she could also get to know this woman that seemed to mean so much to him. That opportunity wasn’t lost yet.
She sighed when she realized this, and then reached over, taking Laryana’s hand. “Well, Ying Zhen is a good friend of mine so if you’re his, then I would be happy if the two of us spent more time together in the future as well. After the wedding is over, you should come by some more.
“Since you are not from here, there will be many things to get to know. Ying Zhen often doesn’t have the time so if he needs to leave, you can always come by. I’ll show you around and make sure that you’re not getting bored here.”
Laryana stared at her in a daze, not sure what to make of this. This might only be a vision on Ying Zhen’s soul path but until the end of it, it would seem as real as if this was an actual person. And interacting with others was something that she really wasn’t used to.
In the underworld, it had only ever been her creator, Nilam, and her. Then, Lady Xingula had come to visit every now and then. Other than those three people, there had only ever been the souls of the dead who were often still too stunned from what had happened to actually interact with her.
Ying Zhen was the first person after hundreds of thousands of years she had spoken to. And now, on this soul path of his, this woman who was not actually real treated her like she would any regular person. This feeling … Laryana wasn’t sure what to make of it.
Ying Zhen could see that she was lost, but he didn’t know what to do. If he had genuinely been involved with her, then he could’ve helped out. But as things stood, there was no relationship between them. Speaking for her seemed wrong but, at the same time, he also couldn’t just ignore this.
He thought for a bit, and then turned to Laryana instead of Chun Hua and gave a faint smile. “There’s no reason to hold back. As Chun Hua said, we are friends. We have been for many years. I can vouch that she is a person that is very easy to get along with.”
Laryana looked at him and seeing the smile on his lips, she was once again reminded of her master.
He was gone forever but the world continued to go on. There would be new people, new situations, every single day. She couldn’t get the old back just like Ying Zhen could not return to this past of his. All he had were these illusions while all she had were her memories.
Maybe that was enough. Maybe him coming to the underworld could change things here as well. Maybe in the future, everything would be different. She just needed to wait for that. And maybe she could also have a very small part in it.
Thinking of that, a brilliant smile lit up her face, making those three demons look at her in a daze. Laryana didn’t seem to realize. She merely turned back to Chun Hua and gently squeezed her hands in return. “Thank you. I would feel very much honored if we could do that.”
Even if it couldn’t be with this Chun Hua herself, maybe there would indeed be another person in the future that she could spend time with and would have the chance to explore a small part of the world with. It didn’t matter who it was and what they did, just that for once, she would not be alone. Yes, that was something she wished for.
Chun Hua was stunned by Laryana’s reaction but she finally smiled as well. She wasn’t sure how Ying Zhen had met this woman or how close they actually were but she seemed quite pleasant to get along with. As such, maybe they could have a good relationship in the future. She would be happy about that.
Just then, a servant came over, telling her and her husband of another important guest that had arrived. Chun Hua and her husband apologized and then bid them farewell, going to see the other guest.
Meanwhile, Laryana turned to look at Ying Zhen, wondering how he was faring now. Had this already changed something about the regrets he held?
Ying Zhen also turned to look at her but faintly shook his head. He would’ve explained but with everyone else around, that didn’t seem like a good idea. He didn’t know if it would influence the vision. But since it could be, he didn’t want to take the chance.
No, if he could, he wanted to try this once and make his peace with it. That way, he wouldn’t lose as much time. Then after, he could hurry on and make his way over to the next part of his soul path. He didn’t know for sure but he was certain that there would be more steps on this path. It just seemed like the logical thing considering how long he had lived and how many things had gone awry in his life.
Laryana didn’t urge him either and just quietly stood next to him, waiting for him to decide how to continue. It seemed as if he was waiting for something but she couldn’t imagine what that might be. Anyway, he had seen the woman he had loved and had spoken to her. Whatever he wanted to make sure of, he should have done so already, shouldn’t he? But she didn’t dare to ask.
Meanwhile, Ying Zhen tried to look unbothered, just as he likely would’ve tried to do if he had really come here back then.
He wasn’t sure if it had worked but after a few moments, another servant came over, and motioned to the side, asking them to step further away from the other guests.
Ying Zhen smiled faintly, already having expected this. Most likely, as soon as they arrived wherever nobody could hear, they would be asked to leave. He just wasn’t sure who had asked for that. When he finally found out, then he could indeed make his peace with this.
He and Laryana followed the servant over to a corner of the courtyard that was indeed deserted before the servant turned back around to them.
“Mister Ying, I apologize for being rude, but Madam Chun asks you to leave.”
Ying Zhen raised his brows, surprised that the servant would say this directly just who had sent him. But then, maybe she had figured that her name would give him pause and actually make him do as she said.
He wanted to say yes immediately, but then he reconsidered. If this was his true life and if he indeed had come here with Laryana and seen that Chun Hua was doing well, then maybe he would have left outright, not wanting to cause a ruckus on her wedding day. But his regret was Chun Hua’s death and this part of his soul path was about figuring out if there would have been a way to stay here so that he could help out in the fight that would break out later. With a seasoned soldier among them, maybe their chances would’ve been better, after all. At the very least, that was what he had always thought. So, he couldn’t leave without putting up a fight. He needed to try and stay.
Thinking of this, he tilted his head. “Miss Chun did not seem bothered with my presence, neither did her husband-to-be. What if I was not inclined to do as Madam Chun asked?”
The servant looked at him, his gaze turning guarded. “Then I’m afraid that somebody else will need to ask you to leave.”
Ying Zhen nodded, his gaze slipping to another group of servants that were hovering nearby. Clearly, Chun Hua’s mother was willing to make sure that he left by any means necessary.
He shook his head, feeling that she was being too much. But nonetheless, he nodded in the end. “If that is what the Madam wants, then I will oblige.” After all, in the past, he never would have had the face to stay after being asked to leave this directly. Not without knowing what would happen in the future.
He turned to Laryana, giving a faint smile and motioning in the direction of the back entrance. Clearly, they wouldn’t want them to leave through the main door while Chun Hua was out there greeting other guests. If she knew, she would’ve asked him to stay. And he was pretty sure that the servants and her mother would make sure that that couldn’t happen.
Stepping out of the estate, he looked up at the sky and then motioned for Laryana to follow him. “There is one more thing that I want to do here. Let’s go.”
She nodded and then hurriedly followed along. No matter what it was that he wanted to do, she would quietly accompany him, hoping that it would help him make peace with what had happened back then.
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