Beatrice Dupont was wandering a strange wasteland with a relative stranger. It was starting to sink in that she really didn’t know how she’d ever get home.

 

“Just how big is your world?” she wondered.

 

“You’ve seen most of it by now,” Mad Hat answered.

 

“Really? It’s a lot smaller than I thought then.”

 

“How big is your world?”

 

“Oh, it’s much larger... but I suppose it can seem just as small sometimes...”

 

“How do you mean?”

 

“In my world, space is infinite, but it can still feel like you’re the only person in it.”

 

“How does that happen?” he asked.

 

Beatrice shrugged. “Even with all those other people, you can still feel very alone.”

 

“But you’re not alone,” Mat Hat pointed out.

 

“You can feel... separated then...” she trailed off.

 

“HALT!” shouted someone ahead of them.

 

A band of people stood blocking their path. They looked menacing, holding shovels and baseball bats, though their clothes were brightly colored, if not a little worn.

 

“We mean no harm, we’re just passing through,” Mat Hat mediated, raising his hands passively.

 

“Then what are you doing with those grenades?” one of the people demanded.

 

“These are just eggs,” Beatrice explained. “We’ll probably end up eating them; I’m getting hungry again.”

 

The people gasped. “Do you mean to destroy yourselves?”

 

“No, we mean to cure our hunger.”

 

“Who are you who can consume grenades with no ill effect?”

 

“We are no ones of consequence, if you let us get on our way,” offered Mat Hat.

 

“We shall allow you to pass, but only after you have helped us solve a problem, Oh Great Grenade Eaters.”

 

“What’s your problem?” Beatrice asked.

 

“We attempted to procure a set of wasps to use as part of the war effort, but instead all we ended up with was a silly deck of cards,” they explained.

 

“What do you want us to do about it?”

 

“If you could find a way to turn these cards into wasps we would be forever grateful.”

 

“Cards into wasps? I’ve never heard such nonsense,” Beatrice scoffed.

 

“I can do that,” chimed in Mad Hat. “CARD, WARD, WARP, WASP. There.” And just like that, the deck of cards turned into a cloud of buzzing wasps.

 

Beatrice stared in amazement, mouth slightly hanging open.

 

“Now, if you don’t mind, we’ll be on our way.” Mad Hat tipped his cap and guided his companion away.

 

The gang conceded. “Many thanks to you and yours!” They called after the Egg Eaters before move on.

 

“Can you change anything in your world like that?” Beatrice asked, still amazed.

 

“Don’t be silly,” Mat Hat replied.

 

“Oh, I’m the silly one?” Beatrice abruptly stopped. “People here think eggs are grenades, mirrors are used as teleportation devices to other planes of existence, abnormally sized animals are running around all over, some with the capabilities of speech, and I’m being ridiculous?”

 

“Yes, you are,” confirmed Mad Hat as he tried to get her moving again. “Just because the things in my world aren’t the same as in yours doesn’t mean your world is any better or more real.”

 

“Your world isn’t real. None of this is real!” she exploded, standing her ground. “This is just some messed up hallucination I’m having. I must’ve gotten roofied and am tripping hardcore, or I got knocked on the head and have a concussion and am stuck in a medically induced coma…” She gestered wildly around. “All of this is just a bunch on nonsense and I’m sick of it!”

 

“It’s always about you isn’t it?” Mad Hat crossed his strong arms.

 

“What?”

 

“You keep going on about how this is your dream, your hallucination…” He motioned with his head. “About how things in your world are, and if something here don’t make sense, you think it can’t possibly exist at all.” He scoffed. “Well, I’m sorry to burst your bubble, Sunshine, but you’re not in your world. You’re here and you’re going to need to start accepting things for what they are. You’re not the only thing in this universe, and you certainly don’t know everything about it.”

 

“Well, excuse me for trying to rationalize what’s happening to me. You’re right, I don’t understand anything that’s going on and it’s kinda thrown me through a loop, so I do feel a little entitled to be upset right now. And yeah, currently all I’m concerned about is getting me back home.”

 

He rolled his eyes. “What’s so great that you’re in such a rush to go back anyway?”

 

“Honestly? Not much. My life kinda sucks right now, but at least things make sense to me there. Maybe you wanted an adventure, but I was perfectly content living my hum-drum life.”

 

“Were you?”

 

She glared. “What about you? If your world is so awesome then how come you were just itching to do something different? You were so bored you basically set out on a suicide mission.”

 

“To help you. I risked my neck because I needed to help you.”

 

“I never asked for your help. You insisted. Now I insist that you knock it off.”

 

“Just what do you think you’re going to do? Wander around until the Prince finally catches you and hope he has a change of hearts?”

 

“Maybe! It’s not your concern anymore. Thanks for saving my life and have a nice one.” Beatrice thrust the carton of eggs into his arms and stomped off.

 

“Good luck, Princess! You’re gonna need it!” Mad Hat called after her, then cursed under his breath.