Read AI generated stories that actually slap +shitposts :: Screenplay (what is going on?)

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FADE IN:

INT. HOME - DAY

SPONGECHAD, yellow and muscular man in his iconic outfit, sits with his buddies at a Krusty Krab table eating a Krusty Krab burger.

PATRICIA, SPONGECHAD's pink and curvy girlfriend smells the air like a bloodhound.

PATRICIA

Something smells funky…

SPONGECHAD

It is nothing.

------------- (had to thoroughly make sure inferkit picks up on the fact its a screenplay)

All of a sudden, for no reason, all of the water around SPONGECHAD literally sprays down on his face. SPONGECHAD walks inside and tries to mop it off. When he can't do it, he throws down the mop and goes out and pours water all over his body to try to cool it off.

CUT TO:

INT. RATHSMITH

A rat walks over and sits at RATSOFT'S machine. RATSOFT smiles to himself as the rat turns a key.

RATSOFT

Just like I said, it's just a desk toy.

The rat takes a bite of a piece of old toast and then all of a sudden the whole chair explodes into a million pieces, showering the rat with crumbs, which he immediately eats. When he finishes the toast, the rat puts down the cup he was drinking from and runs out of the room, over to the remnants of the chair. A look of disappointment crosses the rat's face as he realizes it didn't work. He goes back and stares at the chair for a while, then as he pulls his tiny paws over his ears and squeals, he falls to the ground, dead.

PATRICIA

(into communicator)

Bart, where are you? I can't find him anywhere.

BART

(into communicator)

I'm at the Krusty Krab. The water is gushing everywhere. I couldn't get it to stop. I'm so sorry, baby.

(slams down the phone)

Geesh, how many times do I have to go through this?

CUT TO:

INT. KRAFTY KRAB

PETER, late middle aged man in a striped shirt, sits at his desk eating a Krusty Krab burger. His phone rings and he answers it.

PETER

(off mike)

Go away! I'm eating a Krusty Krab burger!

(calls up to someone on the phone)

Hey, Becky, could you call me a cab? I'm at the Krusty Krab and I'm not getting out of this building!

He then puts down the phone and finishes his burger.

CUT TO:

EXT. KRAFTY KRAB

As PERCY, the truck driver arrives with SPONGE and DIVA in the back of his truck, all three of them are fully clothed. POKE is also along for the ride, also fully clothed, as are STARKS, GOLIATH, and CLAUDE.

STARKS

(into communicator)

I just finished installing all those bizarre parts on our latest Super Hero vehicle. We're calling her The Diamond Spewer, at least that's what the toy instructions said. We've got to test her out on a big demonstration, but now that the water's on it, I'm a little afraid to.

GOLIATH

You're kidding.

GOLIATH'S giant mouth opens up to the size of a plane hangar.

GOLIATH

(yawns)

It's not like I haven't used water as a weapon before.

GOLIATH and GOLIATH'S head both swim into a storage tank, which sprays them with a steady stream of water.

GOLIATH

Look out!

GOLIATH'S head begins to shrink, but he still wants to fight, so he grabs hold of the tip of STARKS' chin and forces him under.

GOLIATH

(gasping)

Where's my goggles?!

CUT TO:

INT. SPONGE'S ROOM

PAUL, young boy, who just wants to be a good friend to SPONGE, stands by his bed and looks down at SPONGE who is sleeping. GOLIATH'S mouth opens again, this time not as wide as it had been, but still showing the mouth of a mouth.

GOLIATH

I feel sorry for you, Sponge.

PAUL

(off mike)

Wait, I didn't hear you.

GOLIATH

I'm right here, Sponge. Do you think I'm stupid enough to hurt you?

PAUL

(loud on mike)

Well, maybe not.

GOLIATH

I'm not a whale or a shark.