Cicada Squirrel, a voice said. Carnivorous and extremely lethal creatures that spend seven years hibernating in underground burrows. Once the period is over, they emerge for three weeks which they spend gathering food and multiplying. Many towns and villages have been completely wiped out due to the cicada squirrel’s life cycle, resulting in them in being classified as a—

“Hold on! Who are you?” Theodor shouted. Having examined every inch of himself, he knew that there weren’t supposed to be any creatures other than skeletal digger, and definitely none that could talk.”

I’m your spirit guide, the voice said. After a person chooses to become a dungeon for the first time, a spirit guide is created in order to help them adjust to their new self.

“Just great…” Theo sighed. He knew all this was too good to be true.

Upon creation, I was specifically instructed to disturb you as rarely as possible, and only in cases of extreme danger or alarm, the voice added.

“At least there’s a silver lining. Not that I was alarmed,” Theo insisted. “I was just annoyed that the place I was reincarnated to wasn’t as quiet as advertised.”

The cicada squirrels are only active for three weeks every seven years, the voice explained. A large colony of them has made Thornwood their home, which ensures that no settlements would appear in the area, ensuring calm and tranquility in the remaining time.

“Every seven years?” Theo groaned. As he did, several of the large creatures entered into the main hall and started sniffing about.

There is no reason for alarm, the voice said, as Theo moved about the furniture in a clumsy attempt to shoe the creatures out. While cicada squirrels are quite carnivorous, they have no interest in material possessions or the non-living. At most, they are going to explore a bit in search of food, then leave when they find there isn’t any.

“Just swell.” This was not a good start to Theo's life as a dungeon. Still, he had to admit there was a bright side. At least it was guaranteed that there wouldn’t be any pesky villagers about. “Lazy bones, stop lying on the ground and build a fence to keep the squirrels out.”

The skeleton remains didn’t react.

“Look, I know you’re faking it, so get back up and—"

Your minion doesn’t have the required strength to function outside of the dungeon, the voice explained. As a digger minion, its only purpose is to dig resources for you to increase your power. In order for a minion to perform tasks a distance away, you’ll need to bestow a name upon it.

“A name?” Theo had some vague memory of how to do that, not that he had considered doing so. So far, he was perfectly content in referring to the minion as “you.” However, if a name was going to improve matters, it was an annoyance worth taking.

Skeletal Digger is now known as Cmyk!

A shimmering message appeared in Theo’s consciousness. Instant’s, the skeletal remains were surrounded by a green glow. Moving towards one another in aethereal fashion—occasionally dragging a squirrel or two that had lodged their teeth too firmly into the bone—so as to create a new skeleton. This skeleton, however, was different: larger, stronger, and glowier than before, with a bone sword attached to the back of his spine.

CMYK – Skeletal Minion

Level: 1

Strength: 3

Speed: 3

Mind: 9

Energy (Health): 21

Free Attribute Points: 7

Named minions can perform actions independently, although they still need access to the dungeon’s energy in order to survive, the spirit guide said. Depending on the skills and attribute points you assign them, they can become useful scouts, or the first line of defense.

Theodor wasn’t impressed in the least. From what he could see, his minion was quite slow and weak, but smart enough to be lazy.

“Cmyk, get the squirrels out of here, then make a fence.”

The skeleton looked at the door of the dungeon, then at the squirrels gnawing at his tibias. The prospect of working wasn’t at all appreciated. However, since a minion couldn’t ignore the orders of its master, the skeleton got on with it… in the slowest possible fashion. Still, even slow work was work, so Theo did his best to ignore the sudden burst of chaos and attempted to get back to sleep. Unfortunately, as it turned out, that was easier said than done.

It took over an hour for Cmyk to throw out all the squirrels from the main hall, which he did one by one, opening and closing the door each time in the process. Only well after evening was a certain degree of calm achieved. With the squirrels off to sleep, and Cmyk done working on the makeshift fence, Theo could close his eyes again and snooze off.

At the crack of dawn, the annoying rattling and scratching on the door resumed. The cicada squirrels had the intelligence of goldfish and the demeanor of cats. Apparently, they were incapable of retaining that the dungeon provided no food of any sort and kept on insisting to get inside. The fence did little to deter them, as did Theo’s skeletal minion.

Every hour, several of them would claw at the door in an attempt to enter, and when Theo—annoyed at the constant noise—opened the door, they would swarm in and start sniffing over everything.

Initially, Theo attempted to resolve the situation by having his minion build bigger fences. Each morning, the fences would end up completely destroyed and the same scurry of squirrels would be at the door. The only reason the door remained unscathed was because Theo’s regenerative ability constantly restored it to its original state.

Three days later, Theo had had enough.

“How do I stop these things?!” he shouted in desperation.

He simply was incapable of enduring this for another eighteen days, if the spirit guide was to be believed. Cmyk too shared his concern, even going so far as patting the walls of the dungeon twice in a sort of moral support.

“Guide, there must be something I could do!”

Cicada squirrels are impossible to eradicate, the guide’s voice said. The inhabitants of this continent amassed heroes and armies to achieve such a feat.

“I don’t want to eradicate them. I just want them to repel them. Isn’t there some spell or poison I could use?”

You don’t have the energy to do anything of the sort. At present, you don’t even have enough resources for another digger minion.

“Just swell.” So much for a free lunch. If Theo ever got to see the lady of light again, he’d have a few harsh words. “Is there anything I can do?”