“Thank you.” Theo read through the scroll. For the most part, it was a typical land permit, but once again, thanks to the generous sum provided, it came with the title of Baron attached. Being a dungeon, Theo was never going to use it, but he had to admit feeling somewhat tickled by the fact. “Is a baron important?” he asked.

It’s the lowest of all seven noble titles, sir, Spok explained.

“Perfect!” An insignificant title meant that Theo wouldn’t be expected to do much, if anything. “People in this world sure are generous. Frame this as well and put it in the study. What else do I need to get?”

You’ll need a building permit and a family certificate containing your full family tree. The building permit might be slightly tricky, given that the standard practice is that you get it before starting to build, but there might be a way around that. The family tree might be somewhat more difficult. For that, you need actual relatives.

“Can’t you get a forgery or something?”

While it’s theoretically possible, neither you nor I have the connections to do that. Dungeons were never supposed to have parents or deal with local bureaucracies. The easiest solution would be toؙ—

“We’ll worry about that in the morning,” Theo interrupted, indicating it was time for a nap. And while the dungeon was all too happy by the fact, the hap turned out to be quite short.

A few hours after the Dungeon and his minion had gone to sleep, an annoying sound of scratching and tinkering came from the door. It wasn’t that the sound was loud, but it was just rhythmic enough to stir the dungeon into a state of being semi-awake.

“Cmyk,” Theo grumbled. “Quick fiddling with your keys and get back to sleep!”

Sir, Spok said. The minion is in its room. Also, none of your doors have keys.

“Huh?” Theo went from being semi awake to fully awake. Crackling a window open, he peeked outside. Two black clothed figures were standing at his door. “Someone’s tinkering with the door!” he whispered.

Theo had no idea who those people were. They definitely didn’t seem to be adventurers, let alone heroes.

I believe you are being robbed, sir.

“Thieves? Here?” The thought sounded shocking. “Why the heck will they be robbing an empty house?”

The “house” isn’t empty, sir. Your minion is living here.

“Oh… right.”

Not to mention that you have been spending a lot of gold the last few days. It’s natural that the local thieves would learn about it.

The door suddenly opened. This was confusing since neither Theo, nor the spirit guide had opened it. In theory, there wasn’t supposed to be any force capable of opening a dungeon entrance. The structure to which Theo had transformed to, was flowing with magic from the lowest basement to the roof. Virtually, every wall and staircase were full of magic supposed to stop, kill, and repel any adventurer foolish enough to set foot inside. And yet, the two intruders not only had forced the door open with ease, but had stepped inside as if nothing had happened.

“I wasn’t planning on using my key-herp on this,” one of the figures whispered. “This better be worth it.”

“Will you relax!” the other hissed. “The guy’s loaded! He spent more gold in the taverns that they’ve seen in a year.”

I knew it! Theo thought. It’s all Cmyk’s fault!

“Besides, who else will buy the barony spot? The lot of land has been so overpriced that it’s been empty for decades.”

Theo didn’t react to this. If he had, it would have been to explain that he found the place absolutely worth it, not to mention that the land came with a title attached, and who were they to judge how he spent his money, anyway?!

The thieves quietly closed the door, then went on into the guest hall.

“See?” the second thief asked, triumphant. “I told you he’s loaded! Who else would buy all this stuff?”

“It’ll be difficult selling the furniture. Although Anky might pay a pretty penny for the leg of that armchair. His cerberus keeps chewing on it, so he’s always on the lookout for replacements.”

Theo felt his walls tremble with anger. Were they actually discussing hacking up part of his furniture? And just after Spok had made it, too? The chair itself wasn’t the issue—Theo was able to create dozens more at any time. It was the shamelessness of the thieves that made him want to crush them where they stood.

It won’t be a good idea to kill them, sir, Spok said. While beneficial in the short run, it’ll create too much commotion. You wouldn’t want to be outed as a dungeon in a city such as this. Not until you have the energy to move somewhere else.

“What do you suggest?” Theo whispered in the attic. “I leave them to take whatever they want?”

That might be the best option, sir.

Theo moved every piece of furniture in the master bedroom to the ceiling. If he were human, he’d be biting his tongue and clenching his fists. Here, he had to make do with whatever was available. All that power and he couldn’t use it to chase out a couple of thieves.

“What if I use the aura of fear?”

And make the inhabitants of the entire town run off somewhere? I fear that might be noticed…

“What about—"

The question remained unfinished. That was unfortunate, since it was a really good idea. Theo would have asked to learn how to cast a sleeping aura and put both intruders to sleep, then gently throw them out and then lock the door and block it with something heavy. The problem would have been resolved, and no one would have known a thing. Instead, Cmyk had walked into the entrance lobby.