Alex looked at the little thumbs-up emoji for a full minute before putting it down and starting his car. He took a deep breath in through his nose. Gabriel Cooper’s lingering scent washed over him, faintly sweet, wholesome, light, round, fresh... and just a touch floral? He took another deep inhale.

What was that note? Vanilla? No.

He inhaled again and could see little yellow flowers in his mind.

Sweet clover?

Yes, that’s what it was. Gabriel’s scent reminded him of the field full of sweet clover where he used to play while Anastasia was having her riding lessons. 

He picked up his phone and looked at the text conversation again for another long moment. Then he turned off the car. He shouldn’t drive when he was barely coherent.

Gabriel’s scent had been pure pleasure when Gabriel was next to him, when Alex could see him, when he could hear his breaths and the sound of his voice. In his absence, Alex realized, the scent came at a cost. It was a heady reassurance that Gabriel existed somewhere, but it was a painful reminder of the absence of its source.

This is insane. I’m insane.

He got out of the car and closed the door quickly, not wanting to let too much fresh air in. The scent inside the car had to last him for a while. How soon could he reasonably arrange to see Gabriel again to get a fresh hit? Was tomorrow too soon? Should he zero out his coffee-debt so quickly? What if he needed to see him even more later? 

The cup of coffee he owed Gabriel was his prized possession right now. Accepting it had been a strategic coup, even if it had jangled his nerves to let Gabriel pay for his drink.  

He looked up at the apartment building. There were lights on in several windows. Probably one of them was Gabriel’s. He pulled the phone out of his pocket and looked at it yet again.

“...I made it in.” 

He shoved it back in his pocket. He’d walk around the block a couple of times. Make sure the neighborhood was safe. That way he’d be nearby if Gabriel needed anything

Do you hear yourself?

Alex started walking. He wasn’t going to be a stalker hanging around someone’s apartment building wondering which window was his. He wasn’t going to be a respectful, trustworthy professional who helped someone reclaim their freedom, and then, four years later, after one glance, started trying to figure out how to take that freedom back. He wasn’t going to be that guy.

He walked faster. 

As he gained distance, the fresh air took the edge off his craving for Gabriel. Now it was just a hot ache behind his sternum and not a searing brand. He circled the block and saw nothing alarming. 

He expanded his range. He scanned each alley and cross street he passed. No one was hanging around. There were no signs of trouble. He saw a police car parked outside an apartment building near Gabriel’s, in a reserved spot. Was something wrong?

He put his hand on the hood. Cool to the touch. It had been parked for a while then.

Officer probably lives here. Nice and close. That’s excellent.  

Alex turned a corner and ate up the sidewalk with long strides. He was three blocks away from Gabriel’s building now, describing a larger and larger circle, but the circle still had Gabriel at its center. He continued scanning for unnamed, nonspecific dangers, feeling ridiculously out of his element.

He had no idea how to do what he was doing. He had no idea how not to do what he was doing. 

Alex knew only two things: that the new bedrock for his entire life was the fact that Gabriel Cooper was his mate, and that if there was a shred of decency in him, he could not do anything about it.

Alex tugged at the neck of his sweater. The evening was cool, but he was sweating from nerves and exertion. He hoped he had hidden this maniac surge of protective energy from Gabriel. Self-control was one of Alex’s core values.

He’d had a lot of practice projecting calm, neutral energy when he was feeling anything but calm or neutral. It was an essential skill when you worked with traumatized people under emotional circumstances, but tonight had tested his skill from the second he had scented Gabriel Cooper.  

Had he been wrecked even before then? Was it already over when the lights came up and Alex saw Gabriel at the other end of the meeting room? When he had started walking towards him even before he could  think up a good, HIPAA-friendly way to speak with him? 

He had known Gabriel Cooper would be at the meeting. He had known Gabriel might not remember him or might find the memory of him to be painful. Alex had decided earlier that afternoon that it would be better to wait to be approached by him. 

In defiance of the rational and considerate approach he had decided on, however, Alex had approached Gabriel the instant he could.

He’d had no idea his evening would end like this. His feelings about seeing Gabriel again had been normal and appropriate. Friendly interest. Professional admiration. He’d heard Gabriel’s name at that previous meeting. He’d sat through some discussion of his resumé. Gabriel Cooper, master’s from Loyola, the dates lined up, law degree from Berkeley… He’d figured it had to be the same person. Alex remembered him as a case that had been tough, that had stuck with him. He remembered that the patient had been likable, and the outcome had been excellent. He remembered that they’d sent a referral to an office in California at some point so he could complete his suppressant therapy there.

Alex had been genuinely happy to learn how well Gabriel had been doing for the past four years. He’d felt… impressed by his accomplishments, but he wasn’t on the hiring committee, so that didn’t matter. He’d been excited that the Foundation was in the final stages of getting the legal fund off the ground, excited about what that meant for his patients and other Omegas. He’d even mentioned hearing Gabriel’s name to Teneisha the next day and she’d been equally thrilled to hear that he was doing well. They’d agreed they were both pulling for him to get the job. There was nothing wrong in any of that, he was fairly certain. He’d had zero ulterior motive.

And yet… All of Alex's wholesome, well-intentioned goodwill and professional respect for Gabriel Cooper had evaporated the instant he saw him again. No, not evaporated, exactly. It had been supplemented. By a much stronger and less noble set of feelings.

The lights had come up, he’d glanced over at his mother, and standing next to her was the Omega of his fantasies. Gabriel Cooper was simply breathtaking. Alex had, literally, stopped breathing for a long moments as he’d tried to process how attractive his colleague and former patient was. Had he ever reacted to another person that way? Started instantly moving towards them as if the attraction was a physical force and not a matter of taste? He had not reacted to Gabriel that way four years ago, he knew that for a fact.

What had changed? Being able to scent him? The change in their circumstances? How was this possible? Well, he knew how it was possible, but how in the hell had it happened to him?

Gabriel must be about twenty-eight now. He looked to be around five-nine in his heeled boots. Barefoot, he was probably exactly average for an Omegan man, but he was long-limbed, giving the impression of greater height. His shoulders were squared, but not wide, and the broad neck of the tunic he wore exposed the tops of his clavicles. Alex smothered the urge to stare at the arcing lines of bone until someone called the police. 

Clavicles. They were just clavicles. When had clavicles become so absorbing?

Below, the clavicles, the thin dark fabric of Gabriel’s top draped over his flat torso, clinging to his narrow waist and the slight flare of his hips flatteringly. His slim trousers stretched around thighs that were firm and perfectly full and incredibly difficult not to look at. At least thighs, though, were widely known to draw stares, unlike clavicles. Few thighs drew stares the way Alex wanted to stare at those thighs, though.

What in the hell was going on with him?

He’d pushed his eyes back up to Gabriel’s face. Staring at faces was less completely disrespectful, at least. The faces of recent college grads often retained some of the softness of adolescence, a softness they tried to camouflage with their first decent suits. In the past four years, Gabriel’s face had lost all remaining traces of early youth.

The fine bones of his face stood out more now–the lift of his cheekbones, the long, straight bridge of his nose, the angle of his jaw, and the touch of upturn in his chin. His skin was creamy, smooth, and touched with the beginnings of a blush.

Gabriel looked like he didn’t particularly enjoy being the center of attention, which was unfortunate for a person so capable of drawing every eye in a room. Looking around, Alex saw that he wasn’t the only one who appreciated Gabriel’s looks, a fact that made him clench his back teeth.

Those board members need to control themselves.

Then Gabriel looked over and met Alex’s eyes. Alex couldn’t look away. More pink climbed into Gabriel's cheeks.

You’re probably embarrassing him. He thinks of you as his former doctor if he thinks of you at all. If he even remembers you.

To diffuse the tension, Alex had raised his hand in a goofy wave that he would probably regret for the rest of his life, but Gabriel waved back with a smile before he turned to someone else to shake a hand that was being shoved at him.

Alex started walking.  

At six feet away, Alex could see that Gabriel’s lashes were thick and long and dark. That his auburn eyebrows were slightly arched. That his large, wide eyes were Alex’s favorite shade of green. That perfect late spring green. Not Robert Frost’s overrated brand-new gold-green, but the green of two or three weeks later, the final intermediate shade before leaves settled into a deep summer green. 

At four feet, Alex could make out a dent in the center of Gabriel's plump bottom lip. He realized his heart was racing, and he rubbed his chest absently. He stalked closer.

When Gabriel was just out of arm’s reach, his scent reached Alex. It was partially obscured by the scent of the Omega that he was in conversation with, but Alex could still find it and pull it inside him. It was fresh, sweet, and delicious. Mouthwatering.

Alex felt his pulse in his fingertips and a flush rising in his cheeks. He felt his pulse in his cock, too, and, the way it had started to thicken.

Just as he stepped into conversational range with Gabriel, Alex realized that he was leaking pheromones. That was what snapped him back into his senses. It was a mortifying lapse, especially under the circumstances. Gabriel, of all people, had reason not to appreciate being smothered in Alphan pheromones.

He realized he should leave, probably. Go home, take a cold shower. Reason with himself and make a plan. Try to talk to Gabriel some other time.

Instead, he saw the cake being wheeled in, and seized it as a pretext for getting even closer.

Alex’s mother gave him a long, curious look as he skipped the informal line that was forming and solicited a slice of cake. She’d handed him a slice without comment, but her look told him he was behaving strangely, which was true.

If she had handed Alex a live grenade instead of cake, he probably wouldn’t have noticed.

He was so close to Gabriel at that point that the Omega’s scent was unmasked and undiluted. Pure. Alex wanted more of it. He wanted to breathe it until he could label it and learn it. He needed to be able to pull it up in his memory later. His brain scrambled for some kind of action he could take to get even closer. Moving to stand next to him, he clamped down on his instincts and tried to smile down at Gabriel in a casual, friendly way.

Gabriel smiled back and brushed the bridge of his nose with a finger. Alex saw that the nail was painted with sexy dark pewter nail polish, and then realized why Gabriel was touching his nose. Alex winced internally at his clumsiness.

Damn it. I’m still leaking scent. 

He usually had perfect scent control. He’d spent years training himself.

What could he say to smooth things over? How could he introduce himself? He couldn’t say anything about how they’d met…

Then, Gabriel had done the thing that turned the tide of the battle Alex was fighting. He swept away the obstacles between them. He greeted Alex warmly, remembered him, gave him a hand to grasp. He unselfconsciously identified himself as a former patient, eliminating the need for discretion. He even remembered Stoffel’s name.

He was so gracious despite Alex’s barely coherent responses, responses that Alex mercifully couldn’t even remember now that three, no, closer to four hours had passed.

Gabriel had crackled with life and humor and cleverness. Alex could have spent eternity watching him moan over his first bite of cake. Then he’d gone even farther and asked Alex for the exact thing Alex desperately needed—more time together.

Alex’s ridiculous effort to deny what was happening to him had ended there. He was a man with a very particular set of skills, skills that told him exactly what was going on inside his body. He had just met the Omega who was biochemically, anatomically, and, he’d grown increasingly sure as they conversed, intellectually perfect for him. Now he just had to figure out how to live with that fact.

And he just had to hide it, while still taking every opportunity to see Gabriel that he possibly could. How would he pull that off? Was it somehow not already written all over his face? On the walk over to the coffee shop, Gabriel’s charm and playfulness leveled him. He’d felt repeated urges to pull Gabriel into his arms. Repeated urges to kiss him. Even though Alex was a stranger to him, effectively.

His instincts were bizarre and disorienting.

As the night had stretched on, Alex had tried to recalibrate himself. His thoughts went in circles.

You’re my fated mate. The more you say, the more I look at you, hear your voice and scent you, the more I’m sure of it. The more I want you. But I can’t do a damned thing about it. So… let’s aim for friendly professionalism. I’m going to try not to frighten you or ruin the warm but professional relationship that you are, very generously, building with me.

He looked away from Gabriel for a moment to clear his head and saw a guy sitting five feet away who seemed equally fascinated with Gabriel Cooper’s clavicles. Some stupid kid in a Rolling Stones concert tee who probably hadn’t been born when the concert had taken place. He damn near snarled.

… And I’m trying not to kill that twenty-something Alpha at the next table who is considering asking for your number. That is because I’m having massive surges of cortisol, adrenaline, and testosterone that I can’t act on. Punching him is something a caveman or a mate would do, and to you, I’m neither.