“Can you tell me why you’re staring at him so much, Chen?” Jun ate his cookies with his knees crossed. Then, he placed his elbow on the table to support his weight.

When I turned around, I noticed Alex, who was sitting a few tables away from us, having a good time with his companions. I snorted, sipping my favorite orange juice from a tilted bottle. 

“There’s something about him that I despise.”

With a perplexed expression on his face, Jun lifted his eyebrow instinctively. 

When I swiveled my head, I heard a cracking sound in my neck and shoulder blades, so I stood up feeling satisfied.

“Can you tell me where you’re going?” 

Jun sat up straight in his seat and combed his angular fringe hairdo, as though he wanted me to notice his new look.

“Why would I? Am I your girlfriend?” I scoffed. “Come on, Jun. I may have a bit extensive sexual lifestyle, but honestly, I am slightly homophobic. So, stop it.”

That loud baritone had him shaking his head and grinning, “You know our band members need to baaam.” He punched his fist against the palm of his other hand while puckering his lips and making that strange sound, especially when he was flicking his fingers. 

Well, that’s Jun’s bad habit which only gets worse whenever he gets anxious.

“I know.” I exhaled an annoyed sigh while reaching inside my denim pockets and turning my head to face Alex. “They have made a blunder with the wrong individual.”

To his surprise, Jun jumped to his feet and slapped his palms against my shoulder blades. 

“Are you serious, man?” 

This time, he sounded unsure and a little scared. With a shake of his head, he expressed his dissatisfaction with the situation.

I laughed, dismissing his assumption. 

“Jun, of course not, I didn’t mean it that way. We are rivals, but–” I paused before that conversation went nowhere, I decided to stop talking about them. With my palm up and a big smile that reached both ears, I looked at Jun’s eyes and guffawed, “Anyway, I’m just kidding.” 

I touched Jun’s shoulder while moving away from him and waving goodbye.

***

Ah, finally. I am alone. At last, I can finally enjoy being by myself. The silence has helped me recharge amid a taxing existence, particularly as I approach graduation in a few months. What else could I do with my time if not waste it at this dull school?

Music. There’s nothing else. But, no matter how much I want to scrawl fresh words, I can’t seem to get them out of my head. Seriously, I was in desperate need of motivation. 

For my upcoming compositions, I needed a personified force—a real person—just like a fashion designer with a muse.

Since that night, Louisa walked away without making a phone call and was probably dating another young man or perhaps a group of young men behind her husband’s busy schedule. 

As she always says, Louisa was always up for a hunk of fresh flesh. 

I don’t think she wouldn’t think of it as an option for fun.

“I love you, Chen.”

I scoffed while I walked toward the backside of the apartment complex and stood near the gate. 

“Love.” I puffed the cigarette smoke.

As I savored the minty scent of the smoke, I spat on the muddy ground and rolled my eyes. 

“How pitiful,” I grumbled as I put the stick between my teeth and leaned against the uneven brick walls behind the heaps of boxes that reached my height, watching the passing cars.

After finishing the final puff, I headed towards the bulletin boards, which were organized in an array packed with the student council’s new posters for the impending event; dusty papers were stacked throughout the area.

I took a few steps closer to them and turned my attention to the poster they were hanging without showing much interest. 

Mark, who was the student council president, touched my shoulder and greeted me with a smile. 

“Hey, Chen. It is fantastic that you’ve come.” 

My brow furrowed and I tilted my head, perplexed.

“Didn’t Jun mention the approaching joint concert to you?”

“A combined concert?” 

My stomach felt twisted, and a chilly shudder at the base of my spine jolted me awake to a strange world.

Mark handed me a copy of the poster, as though he knew my stupidity. The poster was a smaller version that looks more like a photocopy on a piece of paper. 

“Next month, DBXQ and The Painkillers will perform together. As a result, you should better get ready for the fight.”

“What the hell is going on here, Mark?” 

With my index finger pointing at him, I shook the printed fliers up and down. “Who do you think is to blame for this nonsense?” The people behind them were pointed out by the president himself.

“Of course, the fans,” Mark stroked my arm and left with his committee as soon as they concluded their work. 

With their homemade signs with our band written on them, the girls yelled and shrieked. It was insane. Their continuous loud high tones seemed to have caused my heart to race, and my stomach was twisting even more than before.

To my surprise, I spotted Alex approaching me as I walked out of the building. With his face down, he slid his hands into his baggy denim pockets and looked up to see me standing in front of him, and raised his head a little. Then, he flinched, slightly stepping back when he realized that I was already staring at him.

Alex scanned me from head to toe with his eyes. 

“Do you like me?” he asked with sarcasm while scowling.

Unable to stop my laughter, I kept saying “wow” while clapping my hands. 

“Sorry, what was that?” I swiveled my head when I slowly walked a few more steps toward him. “Did you just ask me ‘Do I like you?’ Are you serious?” 

I tried not to raise my voice too much. Otherwise, I would be getting everyone’s attention, and that was a no-go for me.

Alex looked away before he answered. He dug his hands inside his pockets and inhaled deeply and sighed. While his eyes remained at a distance, he continued, “Well, I don’t know what has been in your head lately but,” he paused and landed a fierce gaze when his eyes caught mine, “I noticed you’ve been staring at me more than frequently these days.”

I scoffed, though I suddenly felt a cold shiver in my spine. “Wow,” I squealed while I was holding myself back before my fist could land on this bastard’s face. “So what gives, huh?”

Honestly, with his provocative comment, I wanted to punch him in the face. But the yelling fans put a stop to it. Tonight, you’re in luck, bastard. Thank them for saving you from a punch. I thought while clenching my hands inside my pocket until my knuckles turned white.

“Don’t tell me you’re slowly attracted to me, Chen?”

I scoffed and laughed at the same time. “What the fuck, Alex.” I shook my head. 

“If you want peace between us, get the hell out of my sight.” 

Alex walked away without looking back, he stammered and purposefully banged his shoulder against mine.

I scoffed in response to his discreet childish act. Yet, his tall and commanding presence was enough to push others left and right to clear a path for himself. That, by the way, can be literal or metaphorical. His intimidating aura oozed out of him even from afar. 

However, it felt like Alex has always been something. 

In my eyes, he has something that draws me to him, and apparently, I don’t know what it is which sucked a lot.