It’d been a long, fraught couple of days; so much had happened that even Anders’ easy going nature was having a hard time rolling with the punches as they just kept coming. Tired though he was, he couldn’t bring himself to close his eyes just yet, and instead cast them skyward to pick out what stars he could between the branches of the trees overhead while the silence stretched, tense and uncomfortable between him and his mate.

The quiet didn’t last long, certainly not as long as Anders had expected, before Nysid sighed through his nose and said, “Portistown is the easiest target within conceivable reach of the border worth raiding for the supplies. Like you pointed out, it doesn’t have much strategic value compared to other cities we could have hit, which meant there was very little chance there would be a squadron stationed nearby to protect it.” Anders rolled onto his side so he could see the other man, but the prince wasn’t looking at him, preferring to stare into the fire as he finished eating. “It would have worked if the weather hadn’t changed the way it had; we hit a bad headwind partway. It’s the only reason your Red Legion was able to intercept us in time.”

Cautiously optimistic at his mate’s change of heart about the subject, Anders propped his head up on a hand, frowning thoughtfully as he considered what he’d been told. “Supplies? What kind of supplies?” the captain asked, confused. He couldn’t think of anything of particular value that passed through the port that couldn’t be just as easily found elsewhere, not in any real quantity worth mustering the kind of attack Rodshyom had, anyways.

Nysid chewed his bottom lip absently and scowled at the fire as though it had somehow offended him personally, and Anders found himself overcome with the urge to trace his thumb over the man’s lips and give him something better to do with them. He packed the thought firmly away just as soon as it occurred. Much as it stung he knew any such attention would be totally unwelcome, no matter how much he found himself longing otherwise.

For a few moments, it seemed like Nysid might not clarify as he weighed the pros and cons of revealing more information, but eventually he admitted, “We weren’t after valuables, we were after food. Rodshyom has been experiencing severe droughts the last two years; we’re in the middle of a famine that’s only getting worse. Our people are desperate, and thus, so are our actions.”

The prince’s words were bitter as he finally met Anders’ gaze, prompting the captain to sit up, surprised by the unexpected revelation. He had been so quick to write fish and produce off as not being particularly valuable, but to a starving nation they were much needed supplies to keep their people fed and pacified before riots could begin to break out. There was a tension in Nysid’s shoulders as he dropped his head fractionally so his long, dark hair fell forward to hide his face from view in a way that left Anders desperate to reach out and brush it back again.

He didn’t of course, but asked, “Why just take? Why not reach out and ask for aid?” It wasn’t a question he’d have been as quick to ask any other enemy rider, but Nysid wasn’t just a rider, or even a captain: he was a prince. Surely he would know the reason behind his kingdom’s actions, even if he wasn’t the one making the final decisions? “I know our countries have been mostly hands off with one another for a long time now, but we weren’t your enemy.”

“I wanted to reach out,” Nysid insisted vehemently, head snapping up as he pushed a hand irritably through his hair to sweep it back from his dark face, eyes bright with frustration. “It was the first thing I suggested to my uncle when it became clear we were facing a food shortage and I wasn’t the only one! Even if we didn’t go to Marilderland for aid, his advisers and I all implored him to at least reach out to Omdyn or Darakir. They’re less prosperous, but we’ve maintained closer ties to them, surely they could─”

Nysid cut himself off abruptly, clearly feeling he was falling into an old, well-tread argument he’d been having with himself over and over again on a loop in his head for some time now; Anders’ heart give a twinge of sympathy as he listened.

The prince forced himself to take a breath, then drew one leg up to his chest so he could rest his chin on it, still looking irritated but a little less on edge when Anders asked, “Your uncle is the regent, isn’t he?” As a captain, Anders was expected to maintain a basic operating knowledge of the political structures of the other countries on the Eastern continent, but anything more than that was beyond his pay grade, as his second lieutenant was fond of saying.

Nysid cut him a sidelong look across the fire, but nodded. “My parents died before any of my siblings were old enough to inherit the throne and so my father’s brother took over for the time being.” His expression darkened as he stared into the middle distance, fingers of one hand absently fiddling with a lock of his dark hair before he continued again. “I’d never really cared much, until recently. I’ve never wanted to inherit the throne, and he was doing a good enough job…”

“Until the famine.”

“Until the famine,” Nysid agreed. A hopeless sort of look flickered across his handsome features as, in a quieter tone, he pressed on, “When I found him so intent on ignoring reason, I looked to my siblings for their support and I… I realized they were all gone─ all but my youngest sister who isn’t even of age yet.”

Puzzled, Anders pushed himself into a seated position again, brow furrowed as he asked, “What do you mean, gone? Were they taken? Or─”

The prince shook his head, then dropped it back to rest on his knee again. “No, nothing like that. It just hit me all of a sudden how isolated I’d become. My siblings had all been sent off to different corners of the kingdom, myself included. It’s traditional for the royal family to have a member in service, so I was sent off to the dragons when I was a fifteen and remained there until I bonded with Ephinea. Even then I didn’t get to go home much.” Nysid scrubbed his face with a hand, shoulders slumping all of a sudden as the tension finally left them and he admitted, “Uncle sent my siblings off one at a time and I didn’t think anything of it until it was too late. Now I’m on the front lines, leading us into a stupid, unnecessary conflict that’s going to drag us into a war─”

It was a lot to hear all at once and it was clear to Anders the subject had been weighing on his mate for a long time and only just now finally managed to escape him, like poison being bled from a wound. “Nysid,” he began, then hesitated, uncertain of what to say, how much the man even wanted from him…

Once again, despite sleeping deeply, Nysid didn’t feel particularly rested when Anders woke him for his watch. It must have been written on his face when he forced himself up and off their makeshift bed as Anders offered to give him a little more time, something that shouldn’t have irritated him as much as it did. Once he was more awake and seated by the fire, feeding it  wood from the pile Anders must have replenished at sometime in the night, Nysid regretted the short answer he’d given the other man in response to his kindness.

And he was kind; that much the prince was ready to admit to himself in the pale light of pre-dawn as he braided his hair back from his face in preparation for the day. ’Kind and far too easy to talk to’, Nysid thought to himself as he found his gaze drawn inexorably back towards the sleeping form of the man who was apparently his mate. He’d practically blurted out his entire history to him the night before; not something the prince was in the habit of doing, though he had to (reluctantly) admit that it’d felt good to get even that much off his chest. The troubles back home weren’t something he had anyone but Ephinea to talk to about usually, so suddenly finding a sympathetic ear in Anders had been a trap he’d stumbled right into. His partner was wonderfully patient and wise, but sometimes more immediate human concerns could be a bit beyond her ability to truly empathize with. To a dragon’s mind, when a place became uninhabitable, they simply moved on to new hunting grounds, so the concerns of running a kingdom were not ones she was particularly familiar with.

Vaguely irritated at himself for the show of weakness, and annoyed at Anders for being so very personable, Nysid tied off his braid, filled the other rider’s helmet at the stream, and placed it by the fire to boil so they could refill the waterskin before they broke camp. The helmet didn’t make for a very efficient pot, thanks to the t-shaped cutout in the front, but Nysid had to admit they were lucky to have even that much. He was lucky to have found Anders, period, after leaving him in the marsh.

It had been a shock to look down into those brown eyes, sword raised on high, ready to be plunged down into his enemy’s heart, and feel not anger or hate, or even fear, but a sense of recognition. An elation of finding something once lost, a fervent desire to cast aside his sword and draw the man beneath him close and never let go. In that moment, Anders’ life had seemed as dear to him as Ephinea’s. Dearer than his own, and the feeling had shocked him to his core, overwhelming his senses and convincing him that fleeing that alien sensation was the only right answer.

Nysid felt it again now as his gaze lingered on Anders’ sleeping figure. The man lay curled up on his side, head pillowed on his arm, appearing completely at ease and totally trusting that his companion was watching over him. Anders’ golden hair stuck up at odd angles and made the prince’s fingers itch to neaten it, then trail absently over his cheek and down along his stubbled jaw… Nysid dragged his eyes back to the fire, frowning at the sense of affection blossoming behind his breastbone for the other man. He’d rejected it whole-heartedly back in the marsh, but here, alone with his thoughts after spending the day with Anders, growing to understand what kind of person he was, the feeling seemed less alien. Like his brain hadn’t quite been able to reconcile itself to the way his heart, his soul, felt before, but now-

It occurred to him suddenly that Ephinea might not even known her mate’s name yet thanks to the way he’d insisted they leave them behind when they’d first met, and the prince buried his face in his hands as he was overcome with guilt.