LILITH 

Despite everything I was feeling, I loved the people of Eden.

Having been created first, I felt some sort of responsibility towards them. Adam often made the joke that as the first man and woman, they were all like our children, and perhaps they were. 

They had also been made as male and female, and several of them had become intimate enough to conceive children. Welcoming a child into Eden was an event filled with excitement for not just the parents—but for everyone.

As the creator intended, the population grew over time. There were around 100 of us living in the city. On certain days, Adam and I took everyone to a huge field of grass perched on a hill with a view of the city. It grew trees with the tastiest fruits and blossomed with lovely flowers. While I traveled from tree to tree with the ladies and the young girls, singing praises to the creator and picking fruits, Adam spent his time there with the men and young boys, playing wrestling and riding horses. 

"What do you think of this one Lilith?", Cora asked as she yanked a fruit from where it hung on a tree, "I've never tried it before"

Cora was one of the women in Eden. She had short, black hair that flowed over her forehead, and she was petite. She had recently been married and believed that spending time with me would teach her a few things about pleasing her spouse. 

If only she knew I getting tired of mine by the day.

"I love it", I said to her, "it's sweet with a slightly sour aftertaste that's also very addictive"

She regarded the fruit with a raised eyebrow. Then she bit into it. Her enormous brown eyes widened in delight a moment later, and she gave a small grimace while pressing her lips together. 

"How is it?" I chuckled. 

She swallowed rapidly and gave a fast nod, saying, "It's good. It's sour at the end, but I want to eat more." 

"I told you"

While she was still eating, she snatched more fruits from the tree with her other hand and threw them into the basket I was holding near to my chest. 

The earth's green was more vibrant than usual under the sun's golden rays, and the sky was a soft baby blue with clouds floating by. I took a big breath while scanning the field. My nose was full of the aroma of new flowers, and the wind was sweeping my hair across my face.  I pulled it back and tucked it behind my ear before my gaze settled on Adam. He was lifting a child in his arms.

I looked away immediately as my heart skipped a beat. 

I couldn't help but feel uneasy in my chest whenever I stared at Adam. My throat would tighten and my heart would start to beat rapidly when we were alone in the house. It wasn't the same as how I used to feel, and I sensed that being around him simply made it worse. 

"Cora", I turned to her, "how do you feel when you're with Cyril?"

Cyril was Cora's husband. Although there was no set marriage custom among the Edenic populace, if two people fell in love, they stayed together and prioritized procreation. Cora hadn't had a child yet but I wouldn't have been too surprised if she daydreamed about having one.

She gave me an odd look, as though I had asked a stupid question "I feel fantastic, Lilith, how else am I expected to feel?" she exclaimed, "Cyril is amazing and he feels safe to depend on"

I licked my lower lip. Adam used to make me feel comfortable relying on him, but that didn't feel so great now that he was demanding and hostile when he didn't get his way. 

"Hmm...", I hummed, "If he asks you to do something you don't want to do, would you still do it?"

She nodded without hesitation, "yes. Cyril is a man and I'm his woman. He always knows what's best"

She took the basket from me and turned to fetch another fruit while standing on the tip of her toes. I glared at the back of her head. Adam and the other males were not different from one another. It was I who was now different from the other women.

I was well aware that they all shared Cora's perspective and that I had once held it myself. I couldn't help but believe that now that I felt different, I was the issue. I mean, If I was the only woman in all of Eden who thought that occasionally she should be allowed to form her own thoughts and make her own judgments, then there had to be something wrong with me. 

I turned to look at Adam again and noticed he was now moving in my direction. The young child he was holding now sat in his arms and glared at him with a slight scowl on her face. 

"Eloise", I said and the girl's eyes turned to mine. She parted her lips and grinned as I shook my head in amusement and asked, "what did you do now?"

Adam laughed, "she started a wrestling match with the boys", he said, "got herself hurt and now she has a bruise"

Eloise's palm covered an exposed part of her thigh and I moved it away gently. The bruise was small but I knew it stung nonetheless. I ran my finger over it and she flinched but her eyes continued to twinkle. 

"It was fun!", she said.

"Doesn't matter, you're still a girl Eloise", Cora remarked as she peered over my back, "you shouldn't be out there fighting and causing trouble"

"You should listen to Cora", Adam said as he tapped Eloise's nose amusingly, "can't have you picking a fight with your husband every time he asks you to do something, now can we?"

When he said that, I saw him give me a quick glance, and I rolled my eyes at him when he turned his head away. 

"I don't want a husband," grizzled Eloise as she covered her face with her messy brown hair.

"Come here, you naughty child", Cora said as she dropped the basket and took the girl from Adam, "let's go clean up your wound and get you out of those clothes"

Adam dropped Eloise who then took Cora's hand. I watched them walk away before returning my attention to him. He was gazing at me, his hazel-green eyes analyzing my face. 

"My love", he took my hand in his, "are you having a fun day outside?"

I took another look at the field and then back at him. He exhaled in relief as I nodded, forcing a smile at him. 

I needed to get out of his sight for a while. I needed to find an answer to why I was changing, why I wasn't so satisfied with my life. There was only one place I knew would find all the answers. 

I wrapped my hands around Adam's neck and said, "I can think of a few ways I could have more fun," with a sly smile. 

"You want to go back home?", he asked with a smile as his eyes glowed. 

I nodded.

Leaving the fruit basket behind, without another word, he grasped my hand and dragged me through the field, towards the path that led down the hill.

The evening was fast approaching and when night came, I planned to put Adam to sleep and sneak out to meet him.

The creator.

If I could meet the creator, then I would know what to do.