*Please note that Leith is being misgendered because the others don't know. All the other reasons aren't valid to misgender someone.*
9-The infamous ex
Kenton's pov
Gosh, why are things so confusing those days? Ever since I made the mistake of kissing Liam...Ugh! Leith at that party, I just kept having those weird feelings.
Before that party, I saw them as an intriguing person that I wanted to get to know but now I don't know. I don't even want to think about it. It's driving me mad. Even if I really know what those feelings are, I just can't help but deny those feelings. I don't know why.
There's something special about Leith. Yeah, I'm going to use their preferred name, now...Regardless, I just can't put it into words. It's not Leith's long hair that they put on a braid or a ponytail. It's not those rare moments I see them smile. Just...I don't know what to think anymore.
I've never felt like this. Usually, when I like someone, I just go at it and everything works out but it's just the same when it comes to Leith.
I'm usually quite confident in that department, always been but I don't know what's wrong with me, I've become jello.
I can't ask my friends about that. They'll just tell me to kiss them or that it's not serious or whatever. I mean, they aren't wrong, it's always me who made the first move especially when I was the one that liked them. It's not like me to behave like I am right now. Sometimes I just tell myself I should kiss Leith because, after all, they like me back.
Oh gosh, it feels weird knowing they like me back. I still remember their brave confession.
Regardless, last week, I kissed Leith. Yeah, I did and I won't lie here, I liked it. Not because it was a kiss, no, it felt different and special because it was Leith. It's so hard to explain.
I thought it was only because I was drunk that made the kiss feel so good, so special but now that I kissed Leith again, I know definitely it wasn't because I was drunk.
Even if I kissed Leith, I still couldn't act like myself last week when they came to talk to me.
Hell, they are normally the one that are more shy not me for god's sake!
Through, when they mentioned that party, I just, I couldn't help myself. I felt the intense urge to kiss them. I was so confused about whatever I was feeling, I just wanted to confirm whatever I was feeling you know?
And I'm glad I did. Gosh, it must have been one of the best kisses I have ever had no jokes. I don't know if I'm imagining it but it didn't feel like all the times I kissed my exes and my flings, it just felt right.
The issue now is that they haven't talked to me since then. I think I scared them off with the kiss.
Yeah, after I kissed them, they left all shy. Just the sight makes me smile.
Though I haven't tried reaching out to Leith because I want to give them some space and time to think, still, I still desperately need to verify what it is I'm feeling. I'm just beyond confused. I'm a mess right now.
I badly want to know why kissing Leith is so different, why they are so intriguing. What's different about them? Why kissing others is no longer interesting, why I just long to be with Leith, why I was thinking about Leith when I was partying two days ago instead of just having fun? Why Leith is such a magnet to me and most importantly why I don't feel like my usual self nowadays.
This is unlike what I've ever felt for my past flings and exes. This is a whole new level.
Regardless, it's been a week now since that happened. That's not a good thing, like at all. I just...I want to text them but I'm afraid of what they'll tell me. This is so unlike me to not confront the situation.
Anyway, we don't know each other quite well. I don't know if we can consider ourselves friends. I would like for us to be friends but that's just not how things work.
It's freaking December already, that's nuts! I really don't know if they'll talk to me again. I gotta admit that I haven't been the nicest recently and that may very well help them decide to not be associated with me anymore in any way.
I know it's odd that I'm spending so much time thinking about such a small matter instead of my social status but I just do.
It's surprising my friends haven't noticed a thing yet. I'm sure the guys noticed but for some reason, they haven't been saying a word about it, how odd.
Nonetheless, not only am I confused about what's happening, I still can't figure out the non-binary business.
I've been trying to look on the net about it but only to be told that I might even be pansexual. What the hell does that mean?! I didn't think Leith's was that different from the others. I knew they weren't like the others but still...
Even if I can't really understand what this all is. I try to force myself to think about them as Leith, not Liam. I want to make an effort. I don't want to be like the other guys...
Apparently, web pages kept saying I shouldn't call them by their birth name. How strange...So Leith was right. There are indeed other pronouns like they/them and are used in a singular tense. I never really thought that her, she, he and him were even pronouns in the first place. This is entirely new to me.
It's not my fault that what I'm being taught is catholic and not those kinds of things. I would've never thought there was such a thing as other sexualities and even other gender identities! It may be puzzling to me but you know what? I don't regret knowing that. It's kind of refreshing to know I have more knowledge than the others.
The thing is that I have yet to call Leith by that name. Am I a jerk for not respecting that?
"Kenton!"
"Huh, yeah?"
"Are you even listening?"
"Uh yes?" Jack sighs.
"It's fine if you don't want to listen to us but at least tell us what it is that's on your mind."
"Nah, it's nothing serious."
"Hm, it seemed serious to me."
"Oh come on, not you too Kate."
"Come on Kenton tell us! We are dying to get some juicy info!"
"Is all you guys care about is people love life?"
"Ohhh, so this is about love after all?" Kate says smirking.
"Well, yeah,"
"Wow, you're even admitting that Sam. How bold of you."
"What? What can I say? Your love life is way more interesting than ours." All the others on the table agree.
"Then you guys should get a love life yourself. Sam if you get with your so-called crush, I'm sure you'll stop wanting to know mine! Jack, if you stop doing this whole secretive persona, there's more chance that they'll want to be with you." Jack for some reason looks at Kate and then looks down probably guilty.
"Oliver, Oliver, honestly there's nothing I can say about you. Actually, no you're such an airhead that it's not even funny anymore but you know what! There's still so much girls falling for that!" Oliver glares at Kenton.
"Kate, quite bold of you to agree that my love life is more interesting than yours. Where's your next boy toy?" For some reason, Jack looks at Kate intensely but I shrug it off.
"Actually about that..." Hah, Cat got her tongue, eh?
"Meghan, if you could find a little bit more courage, I'm sure you could get yourself any guy but more specifically, one of the guys on the table. Come on when are you and Oliver gonna finally admit there's some chemistry between you two?" They both turn red. Aha touché.
"See, it's not my fault that you guys aren't making any effort in getting a more interesting love life. You guys can't even see that tons of people have the hoots for you guys."
"You're so cruel Kenton." They all say.
"What can say? It's the truth."
I know that Kate is itching to bite back but she doesn't instead she looks somewhere but rather at someone.
"Hey, what you loo..."
"Hey guys!"
We all turn towards the girl speaking. A brown-haired girl styled in a ponytail with heavy makeup on, classic brown eyes and a model body. Oh, I instantly know who that is and that doesn't make me the least happy to see her back.
"Ellie?" Jack says in disbelief.
"Yeah! It's me! Did you guys miss me?"
"Yeah," She then looks precisely at me.
"Sure I guess..."
"Where have you been all this time?" Jack asks.
"Ah, about that." She sits down next to me.
Ugh, how great. Why didn't Sam sit next to me?
"As you all know, there's been some kind of tension between me and Kenton but that's not the reason why I was gone for a while."
"Then where you've been?"
"Oh, sorry is it me or are you more interested in knowing where I've been than Kenton, Jack?" She smiles at him but I know I know all damn well what that smile means.
Ha, she's irritated at Jack because she's jealous. Oh, Ellie, you haven't changed a bit since you left.
"Oh excuse me, aren't I allowed to know why you left and toyed with Kenton's feelings?" Her eyes go wide for a second but it leaves as soon as it appears.
"What? There's no such thing as that, right Kenton?"
"Mm sure" That seemed to satisfy her enough to get her to let it go.
"Well, to answer your question I left on vacation for a few weeks in South Korea."
"Why is that?"
"Well, my dad had some business to do there but that's all, I'm back now. What did I miss?" She says with her usual fake smile.
I'm sure all my friends realized how suspicious this sounds except Sam. I know Sam may have changed his mind a bit because of Leith but he used to like her. No, not that kind of way. He liked it when I dated her, and said we were the perfect couple, too bad it isn't the case anymore.
"Well, you missed a lot. Kenton got himself..."
I put my hand on Sam's mouth. I think that made him realize that he shouldn't tell her that. Good. Thank god I blocked him in time.
"Oh sorry, I didn't hear that last bit?" She forces a smile.
"Ah, it's nothing we'll tell you what happened later."
"Ah, ok I was starting to be skeptical about what was going on."
Seems like she still hasn't broken her act yet, I wonder how long I'll take her to break. It's uncomfortable how she keeps looking at me. I thought I made it obvious it was over between us. Seems like I was wrong.
At this point, I would rather be with Leith even if things are awkward between us than be with her. Oh gosh, she's touching my thigh beneath the table.
"So, any parties coming this weekend?" She pretends as if nothing is going on.
"It's kinda early for parties but there's probably gonna be one on Friday as usual," Oliver says.
"Good, are any of you planning to make a party?"
"Nope," Jack says.
"Can't" Oliver says.
"Yeah, no," Sam says.
"My place is not suitable for it," Kate says.
"It's not gonna be at my place either."
Why are we talking about parties already? I don't feel like going there, so boring...
"Oh come on, why don't we ever do parties at your house Kenton?" She smiles in such a creepy way...
"My folks would kill me if ever I do parties at my house. What about you, why can't you do it at your house?" Gosh, I want to do anything but talk about this right now.
"Oh, my house wouldn't be the best place for parties." Such a lie.
"Oh well ok."
They all continue talking while I'm stuck with Elliana's hand on my thigh. Can class come any faster than this?
—————
It's been a few days and Elliana keeps doing what she does best, trying to get my attention. I can sense that she's getting frustrated because I'm not giving her what she wants.
I told Sam about the whole situation regarding her and to my luck he believed me. It's clear as day that my friends are trying to cross the memo that she's not welcome anymore. I need a new plan.
I desperately want to talk to Leith again. I can't stand Leith avoiding me. It's been almost two weeks already! I think they had enough time to think even if it might not be enough but I can't if she's around. My friends have noticed that I haven't been hanging around Leith anymore but they choose to ignore it which I'm glad they did. I don't want to deal with their pestering.
Come on Kenton Miller think...You might not be the brightest but I'm sure you can find a solution. Hmm now I give up I'll ask the guys for some help.
—————-
"Hey Jack, I desperately need your help."
"Yeah, about what? Is it about Liam?"
"What no? It's about Elliana. You've noticed how she's been acting the last week." He scowls.
"Yeah, I can't stand her too."
"Well, I need a plan to get rid of her. I knew she would come back eventually but I kinda hoped that she would stay in South Korea."
"Dude, don't tell me you plan to kill her or something?"
"Bro! No! I'm not that crazy!"
"So she told you?" He gets back to the point.
"Yeah, she did the nerve."
"I never understood why you dated her but now that's in the past. So, what do you want to do?"
"I don't know, that's why I'm asking you."
"Well, she's obsessed with you but a girl like her needs..." He laughs.
"Shh don't be so loud, why are you laughing anyways?"
"Yeah sorry. We need to make her interested in another guy." Ignored again, ok but gosh, Jack is a genius!
"That's such a great idea. You've always been the brightest of all of us."
"I know and that's why you come to me with your stupid problems."
"They're not stupid problems."
"Sure they aren't." He rolls his eyes.
"Got an idea which guy we could go for?"
"Hm let me think...she likes guys with dark hair, fit, a guy that can give her status and obviously he's got to be hot."
"She sounds just like all the typical girls who only care about themselves. How could've I missed those red flags?"
"I don't know love makes us blind." I huff.
"You're one to talk."
"Yeah, yeah Miller. You said it yourself I'm the brightest of all of us."
"Yeah, but that didn't mean you get to say such corny things."
"You think I'm corny?"
"Oh forget it."
"About our plan, I think I might have the best guy in mind for this."
"Oh, really who?"
"You know that guy from the basketball team?"
"Hm, you talking about Trevor?"
"Spot on!"
"So, what about him?"
"Well, I think he checks all the boxes for what Ellie wants in a guy. What's even better so that we know he's always up to a challenge so this is definitely something he'll enjoy."
"Seriously Jack I don't know what I would do without you!"
"Oh, don't be like that. I'm just doing my job that's all." He says nonchalantly.
"Still, we can both agree Oliver is too an airhead to even come back with this type of idea. Sam let's just not talk about him."
"Oh yeah, I agree."
"So who's gonna tell him?"
"Well you can tell him yourself that way he'll know for sure you're over her. Besides it's clear something is going on between you and Liam." I glare at him.
"Ok, ok I'll drop it. Chill out I'm just saying. Well, Trevor won't feel like he'll have some competition if it's you who tell him."
"Seriously, I don't know how you come up with those ideas but they are sure useful."
"Glad to be of service." He says sarcastically.
"I just hope it's gonna work."
"And for the record can I tell her to f**k off? I really want to tell her that." Jack says.
"Just, just find a way to get her out of of table."
"Got it and I'm not joking but someone is coming towards you."
"Who is it?"
"Turn around." I turn around and sure enough, there's someone and that special someone is Leith.
"Um, can we talk?" Oh no...I don't like where this is going...
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