My wounds are mending by the time we leave 

But my dress is still in tatters

Back bloody and bare 

I’ve already lost face to my new home as I walk the stone halls 

Bare bodies are nothing to be ashamed of

The way you show the bareness can be 

And it is for me 

Then again

at least it something else for them to focus on

I have a small section of hair covering my eyes this time

I see those who stare look away quickly

Whisper aloud and under their breath 

Those who hesitate to take another step

So long as I’m there 

I welcome the seclusion of this new room

They had been going for white and brown as the colors

but to me it’s an orangey-yellow with fuchsia and-  

The door snicks shut 

There’s is no bath waiting for me 

So I wait

–

I smell someone new before they walk in

Fresh snow and pine 

He doesn’t ask but he does come in slowly

A steaming bowl and towel in his hand 

Three maid servants carrying in a large bath 

Mint tickles my nose 

Teasing the tip of my

Tongue unconsciously tries to taste it and 

His eyes

Are unlike any I’ve seen before 

Following my movements 

And I follow theirs

How the lightest of blue geometric shapes 

fall down 

Not circling

Not rotating 

Nor bouncing off the walls

But down 

Like rain

His walk towards me shows 

Marks of three colors on his body

Black brown on his temple and sides of his torso

A lighter brown cover the skin of his eyes, nose, arms

White for the rest

This wolf walks to me with no expression 

A white hand reaches out 

Who are you?

-I am Elu, blood of Aali.- 

Then why do you remind me of Mehrdad?

-We are half brothers.-  

My heart tells me he’s probably similar to him 

But my curiosity…

It pauses at his scent

The crisp smell of first snow 

And wooden musk that’s always comforted me 

The air around the wolf is cool

Not bitter

Or biting like Mehrdad 

I hesitantly place my hand in his 

I am Aniseh, blood of Fatimah.

-

Elu takes what’s left of my clothing and strips it away 

He only glances over my body assessing

For more injuries if I didn’t know better 

He washes of my back with soft sure movements 

Soothing rivets and the calming chill nearly put me to sleep

Nearly

He hasn’t said anything 

Not since he led me to the tub

Nor since he began to wash my hair 

The coolness of his fingers a balm to my sore head 

-Aniseh.-

Yes, Elu?

He sigh sends a warmth down my neck

spreading through me like honey

My legs wish to press themselves together

but then he'd know right?

-Aniseh, I’d like apologize for my brother and cousin today. There was no need for them to do that you.-

A scoff escapes me before I can seal my lips 

While my mouth is open truth decides to jump out

They were making sure I and everyone else knew my place. I am nothing more to him than an inconvenience and a means to an end. Although, I do not need to be reminded. The fact with never evade my conciousness.

Elu appears to be kind 

Helping me stand 

Drying me off 

Dressing me in this tribe’s-

No

This pack’s proper ceremonial attire 

Pearls and quartz wrapped around my neck as

Waistbeads of blue roll against my waist

A embroidered skirt with figures on it 

He adorns me with a glass arm cuff of red and oranges 

And a jade bracelet on the wrist of my other arm

I’m given the wooden comb to arrange my hair

Bangs again

This time feeding into braids so they were secure

His eyes never leave me 

Not for a second 

As he leads me to the ceremony 

I see vines and flowers growing in number 

And people 

They part the way for me 

as I’m led to the dais where

captured moonlight shines down on the altar

Zubair says nothing

The Elders tie a thread between the two of us 

Chanting

Going on about unions 

And heirs

And blessings 

But my body is stuck on the suffocating mossy scent 

The river that threaten to pull me under by the second 

The current is running full force to me

Yet I am stuck

I’m stuck for all eternity 

The vows the mud gluing me to the floor

The thread beckons me to slip further 

When the elder pauses 

Time stands still

A collective inhale as the panther turns to me 

The Light has come

And so has the time to turn to Old 

Our ancestors would seal their bond before the moon

Or so I am told 

Before our tribe I shall seal our fate 

Before the moon I shall take my mate 

Wai-

His chest is against my back

Muscles bunching as he forces me to the floor 

The stone is cool on my cheek

A welcome contrast to the burning

heat of the blood 

Seeping from my

weeping skin as he once again claws into 

me 

a spectacle before all

The ragged edges of the floor cuts my cheek

The blood accumulating beside me is all that I focus on

It’s so peculiar 

Shimmering under the rays 

They called me the Red Child when I was younger

Soaked in blood at my birth 

The only time my eyes had color 

To be associated with color

With a curse of old

It’s no surprise 

My arms had been red when I held onto my sister and nana’s body

When the Light finally begun to set and I made my way to seek safety 

I was born again then too

A Red Orphan 

A now as the liquid climbs down my shoulder and neck 

Slithering its way onto my chin

Reaching for my lips

I’m born again 

The acidic taste fills me 

His teeth pierce my nape

Now I’m a full muset

A Red Woman