September, 2017

Wednesday morning I went to the library again, secretly hoping again maybe he'd show up. Even if I had disappeared... maybe he'd walk by to check on me?

But he wasn't there when I arrived.

I sat in our usual seat, setting up my station again, and continued as normal. Because maybe the routine would see him magic his way back into my life.

While I filled in my research, I couldn't help but glance up every five to ten minutes, hoping I hadn't missed him.

But he never showed that morning.

And he didn't show Thursday either.

Or Friday.

· · ───── ∘☽༓☾∘ ───── · ·

As I stacked books onto the shelves and set up displays on Saturday, I began to brainstorm my options.

Maybe I can get a phone repair shop to restore my files...

Maybe I can use Google maps to find his place?

I don't remember exactly where he lives or what streets we had walked down. But I know it's in Hammersmith... and there was a park.

"Olivia!" my manager snapped as a book slipped from my hand onto the ground.

"Yes?" I asked, slightly frazzled myself.

"Focus. Where is your head at today?"

"Sorry," I mumbled, picking up the book and trying harder to concentrate on my task at hand.

But it was to no avail.

The moment my eyes caught the sight of a customer holding a copy of Bram Stoker's Dracular, my brain went straight back where it had left off.

· · ───── ∘☽༓☾∘ ───── · ·

On my break on Sunday, I opened Google maps to check the reality of the current plan I was concocting.
Because, before I went off on a wild goose chase to find his place through trial and error, I had to check the feasibility of my idea.

Yet as I stared at the various lines marking roads, the greyed out sections marking buildings, and the plethora of green patches between them all, I couldn't stop the frown from blemishing my face.

I knew Hammersmith was a large district... but I didn't think it was that big that there's be at least a dozen parks.

It would take me at least a whole day to find his house... and that's assuming I even recognised anywhere.

By the end of my shift on Sunday, I realised the first, most logical step here was to see if I could recover my phone data. Otherwise I'd be searching for a needle in a haystack.

· · ───── ∘☽༓☾∘ ───── · ·

On Monday morning, I headed straight over to a phone repair shop near my flat, deciding to skip the library altogether.

The lady at the desk gave me a warm smile as I entered the shop, quick to ask me if there's anything she could help me with.

Small and shabby, I was quick to glance this way and that as I took in the various phones on display. But despite how dingy it was, I couldn't help but ask myself, What other option is there?

Wander around aimlessly in Hammersmith?

Just ask!

Placing my mangled phone on the counter, I ever so hesitantly mumbled, "Is there a way to get phone numbers off here?"

As her head turned down to take in my phone, I watched the fake smile ever so quickly drop from her face. If she was trying to hide her horrified reaction, she was failing big time. "This thing is messed up. What happened to it?" she whistled as she poked and prodded the remnants as though it might bite.

"I... dropped it. And then it got run over by a double decker..."

"Looks like several double deckers, if I'm being honest." Then she heaved an exasperated sigh. "Look, I'd love to sell you one of our services, but we'd all be wasting our time here. However, if you're really desperate, I can ask one of the tech guys out the back for a second opinion?"

I nodded eagerly. "Please. I'm running out of options... I really need the number on there."

But every single repairer in that place took one look at my phone and shook their head, saying it was impossible.

"We have replacement phones?" the lady ended up saying as the last guy retreated out the back.

"I already got one..."

"Ah, I see... We can recycle the parts for you though if you'd like?"

Reluctantly, I pushed my old phone over the counter, relinquishing my hope in the idea of recovering his phone number.

If it wasn't fixable, there was no point hoarding it.

Dejected, I wandered the streets aimlessly, pondering my options. But really... there was only one solution now.

I had to go to every park in Hammersmith until I recognised the surroundings. I just hoped my memory was good enough because, that day, I was certainly too distracted in the morning by his proximity. And the evening... well, I had other, more magical concerns on my mind.

· · ───── ∘☽༓☾∘ ───── · ·

When I reached Highgate station and checked my transport map to memorise key stops and tubes, I grimaced. The Picaddily and Victoria lines were down, meaning my journey was going to take at least 50 minutes to get there.

Just my luck.

Sighing, I picked the first option and boarded the Northern Line to King's Cross station.

The first train was only a 14 minute journey, so I didn't bother to sit down. When the train pulled to a stop, I eagerly left and sped through the station to the other platform.

But as I walked through King's Cross, noticing one of the signs that directed to the Harry Potter exhibition, I couldn't help but smirk.

Platform 9 and ¾... If the stories of myth and magic were real... Ben said they went to a magical school... Was it Hogwarts?

I still had so many questions to ask him... if I got the opportunity again, I was sure I wouldn't waste it.

Boarding the Hammersmith and City Line, I was still another 26 minute journey away. Thankfully this time, I managed to grab a seat, resting my head against the window as I began to ponder strategy and what I would even say if I found him.

Would he even be home? Would he even want to see me when it had been a whole week... Or would it have been enough time to decide I wasn't worth the effort...

The train finally pulled up at Hammersmith, and I was quick to exit, navigating my way through the station and onto the street.

As the cold wind blew around the edges of my jacket, I shuddered. It was much colder than I had anticipated when selecting my clothes this morning.

Only to make matters worse, as I stood there, glancing this way and that as I tried to decide which way I should go first—all the while rubbing my arms to warm up—a light drizzle began.

With a sigh, I ducked into the nearest shop, grabbing an umbrella and a drink for my walk.

This was definitely going to take a while, I realised.

Pulling out my phone, I checked the map again.

Staring at it and sifting through my thoughts from the way over, I knew I had two options: wander up and down each street with a park, weaving my way through the district until I reached the end, or head straight for the biggest park to see if I recognised it.

I decided to go with the latter.

The trek through the streets to Ravenscourt Park only took me ten minutes. But when I arrived and I took in its scenery, while it looked remotely familiar, I still wasn't sure where I was.

Is all this effort even worth it? I pondered. Perhaps life is trying to send me a sign. Maybe... maybe Ben and I were only ever meant to meet briefly.

But I shook the thoughts away, reluctant to give up when I had just begun. Refocusing on my mission, I centred my thoughts again.

Did we turn up the street before? After? Was it this park?

I started to walk up the middle of the park, glancing out at the nearby roads and avenues as I walked its length, pleading for a familiar landmark or house that I might recognise. But as I paced and lapped the surrounding streets and park, the sinking feeling deepened as the cold crept further under my jacket.

An hour had passed and I had gotten nowhere.

Meaning I was left to resort to my other plan... going to every park in Hammersmith.

But what if I still didn't recognise anywhere? What if it was the same thing all over again? I immediately began to worry.

It was a stupid plan. Utterly stupid. And I should have backed up his damn number.

As I walked back through the park, legs tired and aching, eventually I stopped at a nearby bench. Legs buckling, I slumped into it, letting the wooden structure carry some of my burdens for the time being.

Burying my head in my hands, I heaved a shaky sigh.

What am I going to do? I thought

Maybe I should just give up.

Maybe it's just not meant to be...

But as I sulked about my problems, a voice echoing behind me sent tingles through my whole body, causing my head to snap up as he asked, "Olivia?"