“You like it?” Wesley smiled, rubbing my lower back.

“Like it? This house is amazing! Why don’t you live here?”

“Ah. That’s part of what I wanted to talk to you about,” he sighed and sat on the bed and I sat next to him, “my house in Fern Praire is rented. I was only living there to be near my dad. This is my actual home. I still pay for it. I moved everything in my life to be near him. Now that,” he cleared his throat, “now that he’s gone… I think it might be a good idea to move back here.”

“Oh,” my heart fell and I nodded, “right that makes sense. I…”

“Shh,” he cradled my face and kissed me softly, “let me finish before you start jumping to conclusions.”

“Okay,” I stared into his eyes, covering one of his hands with my own.

“I want to stay with you. Keep dating. I’ll still work at the hospital in Vancouver. So here’s what I want to do and you’re free to make changes to it. It’ll be a lot to ask of you but hear me out. I don’t want to lose you. I think the best way to make this work right now will be for me to vacate my rental house on Monday and sell all of the furniture I don’t need. None of it’s worth much anyway. I’ll just get rid of it. I don’t want to pull Aurora from your class. She loves learning from you and she seems happier being with a large group of kids. So. Would you be against us staying with you during the week? I’m not working for the next 6 anyway. Then on weekends, I can come up here with Rory, and give you a break if you need it. Or you can come with me. I don’t need space from you but I don’t want to overwhelm you. When I go back to work… well I’ll think of something when we get closer. I… I don’t really want Aurora to lose you as her teacher when she’s finally adjusting. I know… I know that’s fast. I’m probably being crazy right now but I don’t want to lose you. I-”

Leaning forward, I kissed him deeply, running my hand down his arm and softly squeezing his shoulder, “shh. My goodness. Your thoughts are racing,” laughing, I pressed my forehead to his, “yes. Stay with me. That’s fine. We’ll come with you on the weekends. When you go back to work, Rory can stay with Arlo and me during the week, and then we can all head up here on weekends. Or they can stay with Holly and Jerry at my house so we can go on our dates. It won’t be that different from what we were already planning silly. The only change is that your home is an hour away from me now. I don’t really like that… but I’m willing to do the work if you are.”

“What I really want is a little too crazy,” he laughed, “so I’ll take what I can get.”

“What is it you really want?” I climbed into his lap, wrapping my arms around his neck.

“It’s not something we can make work right now,” he sighed, his arms slipping around my waist, “the school year just started. We aren’t in an actual… we pretty much are in a relationship now that I think about it but it’s just not something we can do.”

“You’re being vague. I don’t like it,” I pouted.

“I want you to live with me,” he whispered softly, “share a home. But that’s not something we can make work right now.”

“Hm,” I tilted my head to look at the ceiling, “alright. Idea. It’s going to be kind of a long-distance relationship until the school year ends. I have no idea exactly how much time we’ll have together. But… stay with me for the next 6 weeks. Then go back to work. Come home to my house when you get off. I’ll take care of Rory. I know we won’t see each other much, but that’ll be okay. On Fridays, we can figure out how we want to spend the weekends. If things are really good a month before my school year ends, I’ll resign from my position and find a school here. I’m qualified to teach any elementary grade after all. We’re only an hour from my mama and brother. That’s nothing. If you want me, if you want this life, then we just have to both be willing to put in the work. That’s all. I know we’ll barely see each other, maybe an hour a day except on weekends, but I can live with that. We can do video calls and texts. Let’s take the next 6 weeks to really get to know each other and see if combining our families is going to work for us.”

He kissed me deeply, pulling me flush to him and I smiled, clutching the back of his neck.

“You’re… I wish I hadn’t been scared. I thought you’d be so different,” he laughed against my lips, “thank you. That… all sounds fantastic baby. God,” he kissed me again, his breathing heavy, “I am so lucky to have met you.”

“Wait,” I shook my head, “you’ve constantly asked if I’m okay with the fact that we do have a pretty clear age difference. How do you feel about being with someone 6 years younger than you?”

“It doesn’t bother me. You’ve shown me who you are. That’s all that matters to me. You could be 10 years younger or older. I wouldn’t care. It’s you. That’s all. Just having you around… I… I don’t know how I’d have gotten through the last few days without you. Losing my dad… I would have felt totally alone in this world.”

“You’re not just… filling that void with me right?”

“No,” he shook his head and pushed my curls behind my ear, “I’ll always be missing a part of my heart now that my father’s gone. But I’m stable enough not to try and fill it. That part of my heart is his. It’s our memories, his love, and his caring for me and Rory. That’s all. It’s a spot in my heart that belongs to him and only him. No one else. So don’t worry, I’m not trying to suddenly shove you into a spot. I have plenty of room in my heart for you and Arlo that doesn’t mean replacing my dad.”

“Okay,” I smiled, cupping his cheek and kissing him softly, “should we go back to the kids?”

“Probably,” he laughed, “we’ve been in here for a while.”

We headed down to the second floor and found Aurora and Arlo playing with a giant hot wheel track, giggling.

"Hey you two," Wesley smiled, "Are you having fun?"

"Yes!" Arlo yelled as Aurora nodded quickly.

"Oh good. Eli and I are going to head downstairs to the den. I'll order dinner in a little bit. I know it's been a crazy day, but it'll slow down. Do you want to make smores in the fire pit when the moon comes up?"

Aurora nodded as Arlo wiggled happily.

"Do you have what you need for that?" I smiled at Wesley.

"Hm. Let's go find out," Wesley pulled me from the room and down the stairs laughing as we went.

We ended up in the kitchen and I hopped up on the counter, watching him look through a highly organized pantry, grabbing what we'd need to make smores.

"Your house is… far more organized than I expected," I laughed.

"I know the rental was destroyed. I was… I have no excuse for it. I get so busy between work and Rory that I forget to clean sometimes. I'm generally a clean person but…"

"I'm not judging, baby. I've been there. I'm not always the cleanest. I was just surprised when I saw it. It's nice to know that you can be messy."

He came over to me and slid between my thighs, resting his hands on my hips, "baby?"

"Hm?"

"When the kids go to bed, will you sit on the deck with me and watch the stars? There's very little light out here at night. It's beautiful."

"You're so romantic," I kissed his cheek, "I absolutely will."

"Is that romantic? I just really like stars. I used to lay on a blanket with my dad when I was little and watch the stars. I haven't done it in years. I want to make fun memories with you. That's all."

You do?

I've never had that before.

"Oh," I smiled and he kissed me softly.

"What should we order for dinner?"

"Whatever you want. Just get me whatever you get. I'm sure I'll like it."

"You got it, baby."

Wesley ordered our dinner, sushi for us, and teriyaki chicken for the kids and after eating and washing up, we threw on jackets, grabbed blankets, and headed out to the side yard where he had a massive cement seating area.

There were soft pink outdoor couches surrounding a fire pit table that was full of blue glass.

“Why is it full of glass exactly?” I smiled, watching Wesley light the firepit.

“It makes the heat a little warmer coming from the top. That’s all,” he smiled.

We started making smores, the kids smiling the entire time as we talked about what we saw around us.

“Hey, Wes?” Arlo smiled up at him.

“Yeah, kiddo?”

“Why are you so nice to me and daddy?"

“Oh,” Wesley laughed, hugging Arlo, “because I care about you. I don’t think I’m being sweet. I’m just adding you and your daddy to things I would already be doing with Aurora.”

“Ah,” I cut in, “I meant to tell you, Arlo. Aurora and Wesley are going to be staying with us from now on. During the week when Wesley is working, Aurora will be with us. Going to school, sleeping at the house, and all that. Then on the weekends we’ll either come here, go to the house in Portland, or you two will stay with Uncle Jerry and Auntie Holly. Does that sound okay?”

“Really?” Arlo yelled, a huge smile forming on his face and Aurora wiggle happily.

“Mhm. We thought it would be for the best. I know it might seem a bit quick but we want to see if we can make it work. But remember, no matter what happens with me and Wes, you and Rory will always be friends. You’ll always have each other okay?”

“Okay,” Arlo smiled and leaned against Wesley’s arm, cuddling up to him.

Wesley smiled, wrapping an arm around Arlo and Aurora pulled on my sleeve.

“Yeah, sweetie?” I smiled at her and she pointed at herself before pointing to my lap, “oh you want to sit in my lap?”

She nodded and I pulled the blanket back so she could climb onto me, wrapping her arms around me before laying her head on my chest. I pulled the blanket around us, and held her close, leaning my head against Wesley’s other arm.

We sat in silence, watching the fire and the stars come out, the kids both quickly falling asleep as we sat there.

“Oh,” I whispered when Aurora started to snore, “I think it’s about time we take them up.”

“Yeah,” Wesley carefully picked up Arlo, holding him close to his chest.

We carried them upstairs and decided to put Arlo in the same bed as Aurora to reduce the risk of him getting scared sleeping in a new house. Once they were tucked in, we headed back outside, shut everything down, and cleaned up before heading to the deck off of the second story.

Wesley pulled me close as soon as we sat down and I leaned into his touch, seeking the warmth he constantly provided.

“Thank you,” he whispered, kissing the top of my head.

“You keep saying that. Baby,” I tilted my head to look up at him, “there is nothing to thank me for. I’m doing my part as your… uh… the person you’re seeing? To help take care of you and Aurora. I care for you both. That’s all.”

“I’m just not used to it. I know you aren’t either. We’ve both done everything alone for years and now having support is just strange. I’ll get used to it.”

“Life has moved so fast the last week hasn’t it?” I laughed.

“Maybe,” he shrugged, “you can’t always control how life moves though.”

“True. I just want to roll with the changes. Whatever happens, happens. I know that I like having you in my life, I like helping with Rory. I don’t want to lose that.”

“You won’t. I want to make you a promise.”

“Sure,” I smiled, turning to look at him.

“No matter what happens, I promise to keep doing what I can to make this work. We might argue, and butt heads, we haven’t had the most time to get to know each other's quirks but I don’t think there’s anything you can show me I won’t like. I swear to work with you to keep things good, to make sure we’re all happy.”

“I promise the same, but I need you to also focus on yourself right now. Don’t throw yourself into this new life while ignoring yourself. Focus on healing. I’ll be here every step of the way.”

“Oh I know,” he smiled and placed a finger under my chin, kissing me softly.

The kiss slowly deepened, his hand sliding to the nape of my neck as he held me in place, his lips never leaving mine for more than a breath, the warmth of his hands flooding through me as I pressed closer.

“Eli,” he panted, his eyes closed, “I want to slow down a little okay? It’s so easy to fall into you, to touch you, but I’m not in the best head space and I want to ensure that I’m good before I go any further with you. I already have but…”

“Hey,” I smiled, rubbing his cheek with my fingertips, “stop that. You owe me no explanations. I will never push you. We don’t have to do anything until you’re ready. I'm happy to just share these little moments with you."

"R… really? David always pushed me…"

"I'll never do that. I don't want to jump into bed either. I like the pace we're at. So don't worry. Things happen when they're supposed to. Plus I'm not the quietest. I'd rather not wake the kids."

"I'm not either," he laughed, "we'll figure it out."

"Mhm."

We sat there for a long time, Wesley pointing at constellations he noticed and I smiled, listening to him as he went, squeezing his hand and rubbing the back of it.

Wesley's phone started to ring and we looked at the screen confused when we realized it was Jeremiah.

"Jerry?" Wesley answered on speaker.

"Tell my stupid brother to take his phone off silent we've all been calling for hours!" Jeremiah yelled.

"Jeremiah, what's going on?"

"His house. Everything. It's all gone. Burnt down."

"Fucking excuse me!" I yelled, "what the hell do you mean my house is gone?"

"Mama got a call from the fire department. Your house is in her name after all and… they said it was on fire so we rushed over. It's… I'm so sorry Eli. It's gone."

"But…" a tear rolled down my cheek, "but how?"

"Electrical fire. Your heater kicked on and there was a spark. That's all it took. Thank god you guys weren't home but…"

"But… I…"

"They're done putting everything out. I've been cleared to go in and start finding what I can that's salvageable. I'll bring it all to my house. I'm so fucking sorry Eli. We'll figure it out. Mama said to take a month off. They're going to find a replacement teacher for your class. You'll still get paid don't worry. Just… you and Wes have been through a lot this week and I think it's best if you take some time away from your lives. It'll be okay. Just like I have Wesley, I've got you too little brother. Depend on me. We'll figure it out okay? I love you. I'm so glad you're safe."

"Yeah… yeah me too. Thank you, Jerry. I'll… We'll come down tomorrow. Is Wes' car okay?"

"Yeah. They were able to push it out of the driveway."

"Good. Let me know what you find."

"I will."

He hung up and I sat there in shock staring out at the trees.

"Babe?" Wesley rubbed my arm.

"I'm okay. I have no connection to material possessions. I'm so grateful we weren't in the house. But now I have to… I have…"

I started to cry and Wesley wrapped me in his arms.

"We'll figure things out starting tomorrow morning. For now… let's just go to bed."

"Okay," I sniffled.

It's all gone.

I don't know what we're going to do.

This week is ridiculous.

Why is life always hard?