In my place, alone, as usual, it's something I once was used to that now seems to be wearing on me. Ever since getting on this job, and even more so after getting involved personally, my usual solitude is growing into being more lonely. The usual taunts seem to as well be conflicting me more. Before it was easy to give in to them, and I usually found them logical or even helpful at times, but now they seem to try to pull me away from the person I've been growing into when I'm interacting with her. She makes me softer in areas I've usually been ridged with.

Stop, it's just a job, she's just a woman like every other, keep your head on straight.

Pushing my emotions away, I numb myself towards the mission and remind myself of my training.

Emotions will only cloud your judgment, it's better to feel nothing at all than to let outside forces distract you from what you need to do.

Picking up the phone, I dial a number I'm all too familiar with at this point as I bring an update to the voice answering on the other end.

"Tell me, did you ask her?"

Informing him about the wrench thrown in the plan, "It was a bust, but I'm still working on her." he lets out a breath that shows his frustration about his idea not working.

"Are you sure you're going to be able to persuade her? Does she seem to be trusting you at all?"

"She's been opening up some to me, but it's going to take time before she trusts me enough to tell her the truth. There is one problem, sir. I've noticed her getting close to someone else."

Well aware of the new gentleman in her life, I'm unclear if it's anything of romantic standing. I've been trying to play things from one angle, a side to me that though seems genuine, isn't truly who I am. He seems to be acting that of a different kind of character, and I'm wondering if it would have worked better for me to have originally played the same kind of personality.

‘No, you can't doubt yourself now. It's too late to change your personality, it will only make you seem disingenuous and she'll shut down toward you.’

Realizing that it's best to stay the same way towards her as I have been, I'll have to simply trust that in time I'll be able to make more headway.

Hopefully not too much time though.

Speaking up on his side of the line, "Does she seem to be latching on to him more than you? Maybe he's only a friend." he sounds hopeful that the one I mentioned isn't going to be a problem.

I’m confident that even if she does grow sweet on him instead of myself, it won't jeopardize the mission completely. Sometimes a friend can help build a better connection than that of a growing romance. She's already shared some things that don't seem like you would easily give out about yourself. Friendship is my fail-safe if my original intention doesn't work.

"He could be just a friend, and even if he isn't, we're beginning to form a bond that will give me a lead way into helping me convince her of the truth. The mission is far from a fail, sir."

Pausing as he thinks things over, "I'm trusting you on this. I need her trust before I can tell her everything. She can't know about her past yet. Does she seem to remember anything about it?"

Familiar with what he told me to pay attention to, she hasn't shown any signs of recalling anything.

"No. I've kept my attention on her, and she doesn't seem to know anything. But she's definitely hiding something."

"What makes you think that? If she's hiding something then maybe she does remember?"

His tone sounds concerned, he truly seems to care for her.

But what father wouldn't have love for his daughter?

I speak on the question he raised.

"She isn't searching out for you, but she does show signs of PTSD at times. It could be from her adopted father. I looked into why her mother took out a restraining order on him, and it turns out he was pretty abusive. It could logically be from that, but something tells me it's not just that."

It’s a habit of mine to pay attention to the little details most overlook. It's part of what makes this job well-suited for me.

Agitation settles into his voice as he speaks of the  regret I’ve heard a few other times before from him.

"I should have tried harder to convince her mother not to put her into hiding. She was so worried about Madison getting hurt that it only lead to her still getting hurt. Just keep an eye on my girl and keep working on her trust, please. She's not safe, and the last thing I want is more harm coming her way."

"Yes, sir."

Getting a call, I notice it's Madison's father. I pick it up instantly and wait for his response.

"What do you have to inform me on? Anything new?"

Not having any information he hasn't been told, I tell him as such.

"Things are about the same. Your pawn seems to be playing his role well, and neither of them knows the truth yet."

Frustration in his speech, I realize my misstep quickly.

"He's not a pawn, and I don't want to ever hear you call him as such again! I have my reasons why he's in the dark."

"I'm sorry, sir."

His words still having a firmness to them, they don't hold the anger they did prior.

"I need you to keep in mind your orders from before. I'll call you if anything needs to change, and until then, keep me informed and stay quiet about everything for now. No one can know who you truly are or it will jeopardize everything."

The call ends after that, and I'm back to the silence lingering around me. Dark thoughts try to flood me before I'm able to lock them back away into the box they usually stay in.