“Why didn’t you tell me?” Shafir felt his spine stiffen, and he went into his naturally defensive mode. This was always the routine for them. Shafir would do something wrong, Eliqinor would get questioned, and whether he lied or told the truth wouldn’t matter because it's not like anyone would believe him, anyway. Even his own superior, Eliqinor, wouldn’t believe him. Not that it really mattered, since they knew each other for so long. Eliqinor probably thought he had Shafir’s character pinned extremely well. He could go fuck himself. 

“No point in explaining it. You wouldn’t believe me, anyway.” Eliqinor walked up to Shafir and there was a look of confusion clear on his face. Why did he seem so confused by that statement? It was the truth, and that was why he never bothered explaining. Shafir was a hopeless case. Eliqinor was an ass and fucking stupid. They were like two pieces of the perfect distrust to create a whole pie of miscommunication. 

Shafir shrugged his shoulders and walked the small distance to that stupid shack that Eliqinor had deemed as their little office. It was sturdily built, but that didn’t mean it would be something a noble captain of the knights would have as an office. He grabbed the handle of the door and yanked it open. Perhaps a small shack was perfect for him. Delegated to work in a cramped space, having been the former honorary knight of the empress. He really was nothing more than an over-glorified foot servant, but he guessed not that bad. He had a roof over his head to work and he wasn’t having to listen to the rumors anymore. 

“You know you can’t just start picking fights with people. It makes us look bad-”

“No, you mean it makes you look bad.” Shafir pointed out and stalked to the couch where he sprawled out. Eliqinor made his way behind his large desk and sat down. He went about organizing the papers on top of it. “Besides, I’m the Vice-Captain. If I want to fight some little scamp who tried to talk back to me, who are you to stop me?” There it was again, the twitch in Eliqinor’s eye. This was too easy sometimes. 

“No one said you can’t. The only rule is you are supposed to talk to me about these things.” Eliqinor’s hands rubbed his face once, twice, three times before he brought his fingers to his temples to massage them. Good! He deserved a headache! Even more so, it made Shafir happy to know that he caused Eliqinor’s headache. “You promised to do that when I appointed you.” 

“I did.” Shafir sat up now in his usual defensive state. He could stand up, walk out, and end the situation. It was simple and it would be easy, but he could never bring himself to do it. If he did, there was always a possibility that Eliqinor might hold him down on that couch and force him to explain. He could keep him in that tiny office and interrogate him further about the matter. There was a possibility that Shafir would crack under that pressure and act on his urges to-

“You! I swear I’m going to die because of you!” 

“Oh! I see how it is. So you can’t trust me, can you?” Shafir stood up and stared down at Eliqinor at his desk. Shafir felt pissed and disappointed. His face was reddened with anger and his hands were clenched at his side. “You think I’m going to stab you in the back while we are alone, don’t you?!” Why was he so angry? It was just an offhand comment. Surely Eliqinor meant nothing by it, but it still made Shafir’s blood boil. 

“The fuck Shafir! You know that’s not what I mean-”

“Oh, don’t worry. I know what you mean. Oh so great, Eliqinor, loved by all. You know what?” Shafir bent down and put his hands on the desk. He was only an inch away from Eliqinor’s face before he began speaking again. “Fuck you. Fuck your high and mighty attitude.” With that, Shafir spun around and picked up his things. He wanted out of there now. If Eliqinor didn’t stop him, it would be better yet. He stalked out of the office and slammed the door closed. Thankfully, he got out of there with as little of a scolding as possible. He was even going home early, so that was a plus. He could get more sleep. 

Though… Something bothered him. Why didn’t Eliqinor force him to stay? If he forced him against the wall and said something, he might have stuck around. Shafir wasn’t sure what he wanted anymore, and it made him feel like an idiot. Did he want Eliqinor to stop him? Or did he want him to let him do as he pleased?

Shafir wandered for a while after he left that tiny office space. If he could get his anger out, then maybe he could feel better. He didn’t want to go home in a bad mood. If he went to sleep angry, he would have those terrible nightmares, and… Shafir’s wrist itched, and against his better judgment, he pulled his gauntlet and glove off. His first instinct was to scratch at that stupid mark that stained him black. All it did was ruin everything, but no matter how much he dug at it, it wouldn’t disappear. 

“Fuck everyone.” Shafir could feel his displeasure finally bubbling up and spilling over as he looked at his marked wrist. How was this his fault? He didn’t ask for this. Why was it his fucking problem? 

First, he had to deal with a junior knight, one of their men, mind you, talking shit about their captain. The ones who signed their paychecks and made sure they had money to take care of their families. That had Shafir feeling a rage stronger than any ocean wave washed over him and he lunged at the guy. He didn't feel bad because the guy had it coming. Perhaps he could have handled it better... No. He did the right thing. That guy better had learned his lesson from this. 

The second most problem was the guy screamed for help and then that's when Eliqinor showed up. All high and mighty, like the golden boy he was. Constantly showing up at the worst moments. If Eliqinor heard the things he was saying about him, Shafir was sure he would've reacted the same way. Too bad Eliqinor wouldn't listen to him and always gave the others the benefit of the doubt. That would soon devolve into a fight, and he was always the first one to go off.