Tap. Tap. Tap.

My right hand moves swiftly with my pen on top of the graphic tablet monitor, displaying a drawing of a Queen sitting proudly on her throne. When I finish adding the last detail, I stop and sit upright to get a good look at the artwork. I stare at my screen for a minute or two; my finger idly tapping on my lips—a habit I have when I’m deep in thoughts.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

The sound of knocking on my desk startles me out of my thoughts. A familiar gesture that I know all too well. I take off my headphones and look up to see my Creative Director, Dolores Park, standing beside my desk. Her piercing brown eyes stare right back at me—if I hadn’t worked with her for almost a decade, I would have been intimidated by her gaze—as she leans towards my screen.

“How’s the book cover going for you? Do you think you’ll be able to finish it today?” Dolores asks, brushing a few strands of her black hair away from her eyes.

“Well, I’m done with the finishing touches.” I scoot over to the side so to not block my tablet monitor. “I was thinking if I should add more details before I place the title over it. What do you think?”

“Hmmm… I don’t think it needs more details, but it does feel a bit plain on a color background. How about you add an ornament frame at the back? Also, add extra lighting around the character’s face.”

I pause for a moment before nodding in agreement. “Yeah, I think that would work. Thank you for your feedback, Dolores.”

“No problem. Once you’re done, please put it into the share network folder and notify me through email.” Dolores checks on her watch. “It’s almost 01:00 PM. Do you want to go to the cafeteria for lunch, Soren?”

I didn't answer immediately. I just take out a cold sandwich—which I bought from the Deli this morning—from my bag and show it to her. Dolores’s brows turn a deep furrow once she sees my sandwich as she lets out a deep sigh. Now that I think about it, she has been doing it a lot lately whenever she invites me for lunch. I hope I didn’t upset her.

Dolores pinches the bridge of her nose. For a second, I notice a change in her expression—concern, maybe—before she reverts back to her usual stoic self.

“Soren, I appreciate your dedication to your work, but you should at least have a proper meal once in a while.” Dolores points at my sandwich with a disapproving look. “Also, I have seen you eating the same cold sandwich for weeks now! It’s concerning!”

I let out a dry laugh, not sure how to react. It’s true I’ve been eating the same cold cut turkey sandwich for my lunch since I didn’t have much appetite as of lately. Even if I don’t have any appetite, I will still try to eat since it’s better not to work on an empty stomach (It’s just common sense). It’s not like my favorite food is turkey sandwich or anything; I just don’t want to be bothered with the ‘What should I eat today?’ issue every single day. Dolores has never commented on my diet before. I wonder… Why now? Did she get a complaint from the team about me eating at my desk? There’s a rule about not allowing workers to eat lunch at their desk—especially food with a strong odor—to avoid making the office smell like yesterday’s leftovers; Although, they make exceptions for sandwiches, dry snacks, along with coffee and tea. I guess the meat odor from my sandwich has been bothering people in the office and that’s why Dolores is reprimanding me about it. Yeah, that must be it!

“I’m sorry for my inconsideration, Dolores,” I say, bowing my head slightly. “I’ll make sure to bring a different lunch starting from tomorrow onwards.”

Dolores looks taken aback by my answer. “Wait- That’s not what I mean—”

I stare at her, looking a bit confused which she notices.

She let out a sigh again. “... Just make sure to have your lunch in the break room.”

Dolores doesn’t wait for my answer as she has already turned her back and walked away from my desk. I watch her exit the room before turning to my tablet monitor to continue working… Why do I feel like I’m being watched right now?

I look around and notice a brown haired man—who sits a few desks away from me—staring daggers at me across the office. When our eyes meet, he promptly looks away and gets back to draw on his tablet. Other than Dolores’s sudden interest in my diet choice, I begin to realize that I have been getting the stink eye from my colleague, Kayden Richards, for quite some time now. I’m not sure why Kayden is often acting hostile towards me ever since he first joined the team around 2 years ago; We practically don’t interact with each other unless it’s about work.

In my confusion, I decided to shrug it off and just focus on my work instead.

And… Sent.

“I’m finally done…”

I stretch both my arms in the air. My body feels sore from sitting on my desk for hours without end. I glance at the clock on my monitor—03:50 PM. I guess I can clock out on time today. I do have another project lined up after this, but I could just start working on it tomorrow since the deadline is still far away from now. I guess I can use that time to sketch out some ideas first.

I pick up my mug to take a sip of my coffee, but I realize it has already gone cold and I have only drunk half of it. How wasteful. I mean… I can still drink it, but cold coffee is just gross. Better make a new one. I stand up from my desk, mug in hand, and walk out from the office to go to the break room which is placed at the end of the hallway.

“I really can’t stand Soren, you know—”

I’m about to enter when I hear my name coming from the break room. It completely stops me on my tracks. I take a stand beside the entrance and lean my back against the wall. I know it’s wrong to eavesdrop, but… I can’t help but feel curious. Who is in there talking about me? And, why? Also, that voice sounds oddly familiar…

"Who does he think he is to reject your lunch invitation like that?! Arrogant much?!”

“Keep your voice down, Kayden.”

Kayden and… Dolores?

Because of this revelation, I miss my chance to enter the break room as I stand frozen in my place. Their conversation continues.

“But— Aren’t you upset, Dolores?! You have been really generous to invite him, but he just straight up rejected your offer without even batting an eye!” Kayden sounds irritated. He slams his own mug on the pantry, spilling some of his coffee.

Dolores sighs loudly and crosses her arms. “First, control your anger and clean up that mess; Second, I'm not entitled to think Soren will accept my invitation.” She pauses, staring at the wall. Her usual stern voice suddenly turns soft. “As his superior, I just can’t help but worry about him.”

Kayden raises one of his eyebrows, confused. “Why?”

“Well… I don’t expect you to understand,” Dolores hesitates. “I just have this feeling that if I don’t do something… Soren might suddenly vanish into thin air once I take my eyes off him.”

Kayden blinks. “Huh?... Are you trying to tell me you’re afraid Soren might quit his job if you don’t treat him to lunch once?! Seriously??”

Dolores pinches the bridge of her nose in frustration. “Urgh… I know it’s useless to talk to you about this,” she mutters under her breath.

After cleaning the spills, Kayden drinks the rest of his coffee before pouring himself a new one. “Honestly, I don’t understand why you care so much about him. His skill is definitely up there, but his personality is just the worst! He’s unfriendly; He never talks or socializes with anyone unless it’s about work; Don't even get me started with the way he looks at us as if we're lower than him! It makes my blood boil just thinking about it!"

Now, it's Dolores's turn to look confused. "Are you sure we're talking about the same person here? Because none of your description sounds like Soren at all, especially the last part. He might be a bit stand-offish at times, but he's not the jerk that you make him out to be."

“Who else is there?! Unless there is another guy also named Soren Chuang in our department that I’m not aware of; Then, yes, I’m talking about the Soren Chuang we both know!” Kayden grabs his mug as he walks away from the pantry. “Either way, I’m done talking about him. I’m going back to my desk; I need to finish a project before—WOAHH!!!”

Kayden screams as soon as he steps out from the break room and sees me standing there. He looks genuinely surprised and flustered; For a while, Kayden doesn’t know where to look and stammers on his words. It’s obvious to him that I have heard their conversation, although he doesn’t know from which part.

Weirdly enough, I remain calm and collected. I think I’m supposed to feel something—angry, upset, or sad—after finding out how my colleague thinks about me, yet I can't help but understand why he would have such huge animosity towards me.

I won't lie… I also feel the same way towards myself.

After a minute of awkward silence (which feels like hours), Kayden somehow is able to gain his composure and stare back at me. “D-Don’t you know it’s rude to eavesdrop?” Kayden says, trying to sound snarky.

"I apologize. It wasn't my intention to eavesdrop. I just want to get a new cup of coffee," I say while showing him my mug. I don't wait for him to answer as I walk past him to enter the break room and come face-to-face with Dolores. She looks shocked as well to see me there.

"Soren…" she stops, clearly not sure what to say next. I can see guilt written on her face—or, maybe it's just my imagination.

"It's fine, Dolores. Don't worry." I flash Dolores a small smile, as if reassuring her that their conversation doesn't bother me at all.

I throw away the rest of my cold coffee down the sink before pouring myself a new one. I bow slightly to Dolores as I walk out from the room to find that Kayden is still standing there. He awkwardly glances at me, as if he wants to say something, but I choose to ignore him and keep walking until I get back to my desk. After taking a seat, I promptly grab my sketchbook and pencil on my table, flipping a new blank page and start sketching a few new ideas for my next project.

“I just have this feeling that if I don’t do something… Soren might suddenly vanish into thin air once I take my eyes off him.”

Dolores's words suddenly echo in my mind. I put down my pencil and lean back on my chair, suddenly feeling exhausted. I guess no matter where I go, I will only bring trouble for other people.

I need to be more mindful next time if I don’t want to get hurt anymore.