Guilt coursed through him and paved its way through his veins. Wherever they touched burned, he welcomed the sensation. It had been so long since he had felt anything; pain, happiness, sadness, even love. These emotions were like a distant feeling to him, and it had been like that since he had to leave her.
His heart, had it still been beating, would have stopped at the mere thought of harming her. Yet, he had done that, and this wasn't the first occasion it had happened. Every time they met something tragic would come upon them, or those around them, and it would be her who ended up getting the brunt of it all.
He saw how she would endure it all, and she would never move aside so he would be the one who had to receive all the pain.
She would say, "as long as you're not hurt, then it's fine. It doesn't matter how beaten I am; it only matters to me you don't get hurt."
It would dishearten him each time she deflected the awful things that happened to her, and that she cherished others more than she did herself. Although, when it came to her, he could be the same. That's why it pained him just to look at her like that.
"Junhee!" Donghun's furious voice made its way to his ears, and he recoiled at the tone.
Donghun seldom ever got mad, and when he did, it was like an explosion, and whatever got in his path would be wiped out.
"I understand that you want to protect her, but what you just did isn't the way to do it." Donghun now stood by his side, his hands on his hips and his eyes shot daggers behind his glasses. "If you push her away and act like you don't care about her, what do you think will happen because of that? It won't always be this way with her father and the other elders. Later, when it's all over, what will you do if she despises you for the terrible things you did or said to her? I know you don't want that... You love her too much."
Junhee listened to his oldest friend's scoldings and knew that he was correct.
Driving her away, getting angry with her, and acting like he didn't care, would only cause her to hate him.
He didn't want that.
He would never want that.
He had loved her for the longest time. Lying to himself was something he couldn't do and lying to her tormented him even more.
He stood up and foraged through his desk drawer. Getting out a slip of paper and putting it in his friend's hand, he instructed:
"Go to this address and ask for sir Mingi. He's an agent that works for me and has ways to get inside the Elder vamps HQ. Ask him what he knows and report back to me. I need to know everything and anything that will help to protect Nari. Understood?"
"Yes!" Donghun nodded his head, and without staying for another second, he left the room.
"There's something else I need to take care of..."
☽
Music played from a box on the mantelpiece. It was fashioned to look like a mini carousel, and it spun a soft melody around the room. It whirled about the girl, whose face was stained with tears, and her bow lips were in a pout.
Her eyes glistened when she heard a familiar voice behind her, but she would never show him how happy she was to hear it after so long.
He had hurt her.
"That was a gift... For you." His tone was as gentle as the melody still playing, and he went nearer to where she sat. "I... I would give it to you on your birthday, you know the time we were supposed to meet, but I never got the chance to. After... Well, you know what took place."
Sadness washed anew in her chest as memories engulfed her mind: ones that she would do anything to forget, but they were always there. It was like they were stuck on replay, and they wouldn't stop showing the parts she loathed the most.
"Why am I here, Jun? I woke up, and I was in a place I don't know. I... I... Can't recall anything from the night before I woke up here." She rose to her feet and stood before him. Her small hands pounded against his chest as she let out her grievances. "You said you'd always be there for me, you said you would do nothing to hurt me. So what was that earlier? You're the only person I know here, the only person I care for, and you pushed me away. Why? Was everything you said to me, a lie? Does our love mean nothing to you?"
He stood there and allowed her the time she needed to unleash everything. All of her suffering, all of her problems, and all of what she felt.
Then he grasped her hands in his, and he brought them up to his lips.
"I'm sorry, Na. I didn't mean the things I said or did out there." He steered her back over to her armchair and sat her down, then he knelt before her. "Only Donghun knows of our relationship, and for now I want to keep it that way. It's not that I can't count on Chan, Kwan, or Sehyoon, but it's too risky for them to know. Nobody outside of this castle must learn about us, or that you're here. Even though that is the case, I promise I will be more gentle with you. Do you forgive me?"
Nari pondered over his words and then nodded her head. "Just this once, but what you did shouldn't take place again, otherwise this is over. Got it?"
"Yes!"
"You remember right, Junhee?" She peered down at him with hope in her eyes. "It's just you and I..."
"For eternity." He finished her sentence and gathered her up in his arms.
Someone banging the door against the wall interrupted them, and the person exclaimed, "Junhee! There's trouble! It's Donghun... He's been injured."
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