Warning: Mentions of body dysmorphia, negative body image, bigotry, and death
Thomas chuckled, Harriet, didn't like it too much when other people got too handsy with her. He then looked back at the babies in front of him. He pursed his lips quietly.
He wanted a baby.
"I'm going to check on Milo." he heard Avery say as Thomas stared at Emery, as Avery walked away Harriet and Thomas stood there. They were quiet, Thomas didn't speak because he didn't want to start an argument.
"You want one." Harriet spoke bringing the topic up first, Thomas sighed, "Yes." He said quietly. "Thomas." Harriet softly, "I know." Thomas replied, "You're not even going to let me?" Thomas heard Harriet say. "I don't want to hear it," Thomas replied a bit more snippily than he'd like.
"I'm scared." Harriet pressed, "Harriet." Thomas looked over, he was about to complain about not wanting to fight but he saw the concerned and frightened look on Harriet's face. "Milo was in a lot of pain." She looked up at him with her eyes shaking. "I was scared..." Harriet told him, "One wrong turn, and we..." She looked back at the children.
"It doesn't have to be right now." Thomas told her, "But you want one!" Harriet spoke louder than what she wanted, he saw the surprised look on her face when she heard her voice. Harriet ran her fingers through her hair and sighed, Thomas stared, she was shaking. "Harriet." Thomas said softly, "I'm sorry." Harriet apologized walking past him.
Thomas followed after her and they ended up in the parking garage. "Harriet please let's talk." Thomas begged, "We're just going to fight Thomas." Harriet spoke not looking at him, Thomas increased his steps and grabbed her making her face him. "Then let's fight." he said sighing, "Let's argue and scream at each other, it's better than you being this scared!" He exclaimed.
Harriet stared at him with her eyes slowly turning red, one by one tears streamed down her face. "I don't want to lose you." She whispered, her voice was quiet, tiny even, so very different than what Thomas had expected. "I can't... Please..." She begged. "Harriet you're not losing me." Thomas pulled her close. "But I could!" Harriet choked out hugging Thomas tightly. She buried her face in his chest and sobbed. He heard her ramble off some vague statistics and Thomas hugged her tighter.
This hurt a lot more than fighting.
Harriet was genuinely horrified, Thomas sighed hugging her. He stroked her hair as she slowly calmed down. "Harry. Nothing says I have to carry the baby." Thomas offered, Harriet pulled back at stared at him with swollen eyes. "The fertility industry is sketchy at best." She mumbled looking exhausted. Thomas sighed and shook his head, "How much have you looked into this?" he asked wondering where she found the time.
"I have a twenty percent chance of being able to get pregnant," Harriet replied, Thomas, laughed bitterly. "You were going to carry the baby?" he asked feeling a bittersweet feeling in his heart. "What if something happens to you? Pregnancy is risky regardless of dynamic." Thomas told her. "I wouldn't be alive to be sad." Harriet replied frankly, "how selfish." Thomas scolded lightly. "Yes, I am," Harriet confessed honestly with a sigh.
Thomas stroked Harriet's head, "I love you, Harriet." He spoke, "I love you too." Harriet grumbled softly. After checking back in with Avery, Thomas and Harriet went home. He rescheduled the meeting with the investors and he thought about Harriet's reaction.
She was scared of becoming her father, grabbing her phone off the charger Thomas decided on a plan. Altogether it took a couple of days to put together and Harriet was quiet during that time. She seemed like she was still embarrassed about what had happened. Though there was nothing to be embarrassed about. There had been so many times Thomas had been vulnerable with Harriet. It was sort of nice to see that side of her as well.
Thomas had sent Harriet out to pick up groceries when the doorbell rang at the penthouse. He walked over and answered, two men stood there. "Hello, are you Thomas West?" The older alpha man asked softly, "Yes, you're Stephen and Marcus right?" Thomas asked, "Yes." The men spoke.
While the voices had been familiar this had been the first time the men had seen each other. Thomas allowed them in and took their coats. "I'm still getting dinner on but I wanted to speak with you two," Thomas spoke as he headed back to the kitchen. "Of course." Thomas heard Stephen reply.
"You mentioned it was important and about our Harriet, what would that be?" Marcus questioned as Thomas came back in after turning down the food on low. He wanted to be able to speak without worry of burning the food. "As you know Harriet and I have been together for a while." Thomas spoke, "But she's been having difficulties with a certain issue-." Thomas started to say but Stephen spoke up.
"Yes, we're aware you two have been together for quite some time." Stephen spoke strictly, "It's been difficult to see Harriet with an omega that has your appearance." He remarked, Thomas paused hearing this. "Stephen there's a much more polite way of saying that." Marcus scolded, "What he means is we hoped Harriet would've ended up with an omega much more suited for her." Marcus spoke kindly.
Thomas's lips were drawn firmly, he and Harriet were supposed to have visited the two men during the holidays but she had suddenly changed her mind. Thomas didn't press it back then instead he enjoyed the holiday with his parents. But... Now it had made sense. Harriet had spoken previously well of her fathers but she had stopped mentioning them rather recently.
As if she had cut them off.
Thomas felt so stupid for thinking these two men would've instantly accepted him. Even Harriet had a difficult time being accepted by his parents. He had wished Harriet had told him, but then again, Thomas had never asked either. But he was hurt, he thought they didn't keep secrets.
He was about to speak but another voice spoke up.
"There's only one omega in this world suited for me. That's Thomas." Harriet's voice spoke chillingly, and the two older men froze. Thomas turned and saw Harriet holding bags looking furious. Harriet sat the bags on the counter and looked at the men.
"Get out." She spat, "Harriet we've come all this way-." Stephen tried to speak, "Get out!" Harriet shouted, "Harriet don't speak to your father-!" Marcus raised his voice, "I will not allow you to speak to Thomas this way!" Harriet shouted, "GET OUT!" Thomas took a step back startled. The men got up and grabbed her things. "When you're ready to stop playing house with that man call us." Stephen spat looking just as angry.
"You will not be hearing from me for the rest of your lives then," Harriet replied quietly as the men left. She walked over and locked the door, Thomas stood there as Harriet paused and took a breath. "Harriet." Thomas spoke up, "I'm not angry at you Thomas." Harriet didn't look at him, she was standing at the door still. "Why didn't you say anything?" Thomas asked feeling his heartache. She sounded hurt and angry but she had said it wasn't directed at him.
She was hurt by her fathers.
Thomas had invited them and they had only hurt Harriet. The exact opposite of what he was hoping for this night. He had hoped to have a nice conversation with Harriet and her fathers. He had hoped for Harriet to see that it was okay. But...
"What was I supposed to say, Thomas?" Harriet turned to him looking upset, "I can't give you a child and my fathers are bigots. I feel like a complete failure..." Harriet said softly, Thomas froze for just a moment, within that brief moment he realized what he had done to his Harriet.
He had been so terribly selfish. The thought had occurred to him just then. Harriet had been struggling so desperately. All he had been concerned about was having a child with her. Sure he had justified this by trying to help Harriet with her fears of losing him but... Honestly, this had been an ambush to corner her with her parents.
"you're not a failure." Thomas held the towel in his hands, "I've been so terrible to you lately. I'm so sorry." he apologized, "What the hell are you talking about Thomas?" Harriet asked exasperated. "This was basically an ambush Harriet!" Thomas exclaimed, "You mean like what I did when your father and mother almost broke up?" Harriet retorted, "That doesn't make it better!" Thomas exclaimed.
They were silent.
"I'm sorry... I was wrong..." Thomas apologized, "I just..." He trailed off, "You want to have a child." Harriet spoke, "With you. Not just any child." Thomas looked away, "I don't know, maybe it's because it would make me feel like..." He struggled to find words for his feelings. He wasn't even sure about them himself.
"I've... I've always wanted that sort of connection with you," he spoke softly, Harriet let out a breath and walked over to him, the two of them hugged each other. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you." Harriet apologized. "I'm sorry I tried to ambush you." Thomas chuckled feeling ridiculous, those schemes his mother came up with made a bit more sense now. It wasn't that he was trying to be cruel. He just really wanted what he wanted.
But this wasn't a work project, this couldn't be forced. He'd hurt Harriet otherwise if he tried to force it. That was something he never wanted to do, he'd rather spend the rest of his life childless than ever hurt his Harriet.
Dinner was eaten quietly, neither of them was mad. They were just tired, when they washed the dishes together Thomas spoke. "Harriet." He said softly, "I won't bring this up again." he told her, Harriet looked over at him startled. "Thomas..." She started to say but Thomas spoke, "I'd rather grow old and childless with you than to ever see you hurt the way you have been over this." Thomas said softly. "But it hurts you." Harriet sighed. "It doesn't matter." Thomas replied softly, "it does to me." Harriet replied.
The two of them chuckled bitterly.
"Look at us, we're fighting for the opposite of what we want." Thomas said exasperated, "I don't think we fight as much as we think we do." Harriet remarked. "I suppose not." Thomas replied, "I've never seen you that angry before." He observed remembering the way Harriet had screamed at her fathers. "They had said some really hurtful things about you previously. It pissed me off." Harriet deadpanned.
"They knew I didn't want to see them and they still came all this way just to insult you." She sighed looking up at the ceiling. "I thought they were better than what they are. I guess I was still just a little girl looking at her fathers' best sides without seeing who they were." She spoke sounding exhausted. "So they really don't like me based on the way I look?" Thomas asked.
"That's partly the reason, they also seem to think you're actually an alpha and you've somehow lied to me." Harriet replied, "They don't seem to understand that I don't care about that." She added. "But the biggest reason is they had someone in mind." She looked at Thomas when she said this.
"Previously I had been open to the idea of matchmaking which had caused this issue in the first place. But after we got together I guess it ruined whatever plans they had." Harriet sighed rolling her eyes. "What were those?" Thomas asked, "They never liked me moving to Stone Valley across the country. I guess they thought, well honestly I had said if there was the right person I would move back home. But I had only said that to placate them." Harriet explained.
Thomas had been rinsing off dishes as Harriet put them into the dishwasher after being handed them as they spoke. Thomas looked over at Harriet who looked back at him. "Now I wonder why you'd want to stay here?" He asked a bit playfully, Harriet smiled. "It's a mystery." She replied before taking a breath.
"Thomas..." Harriet spoke, "Yes?" He asked softly, "We should go to counseling." She suggested, Thomas's lips twitched. "Yeah." He replied agreeing with her. Today proved that the subject of children was a sore subject in their partnership. Harriet seemed pleased and then closed the dishwasher after the last dish was put in. "We should also get married." She announced.
Thomas had been wiping his hands with a towel and dropped it on the floor. "What?" He asked feeling his cheeks suddenly burning. Harriet turned around and looked at him. "I want to get married." She declared, "When are you going to ask me?" She pressed looking dead serious. "Why... Why am I the one asking?" Thomas stuttered, "I want to take your last name." Harriet replied as if it was obvious.
"That's not how it works! You can ask!" Thomas exclaimed, "Oh." Harriet replied, "Will you marry me then?" Harriet asked, "Harriet!" Thomas shouted flustered.
"Please don't joke about this!"
"I'm completely serious."
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