I held onto Ray, hoping so desperately for my words to be true, but he just stood there without saying a word. My heart beat faster and I felt my eyes watering. It'd been so long since I had seen Ryu...but I held onto this stupid thing called hope for so long. I kept drawing just so I could see him again, even if it was for one last time. I was stupid enough to believe that he'd fine me...that maybe he'd hold me in his arms just like he did when we were younger. 

I missed having someone I could rely on...someone who made me smile...someone who made me feel like I mattered. Tears dripped down my cheeks as I realized how pathetic I was being. I was a man now...and I'm holding onto a yakuza like he's my lottery ticket. As if, just because of his bouts of kindness, that he's the same person.

"I...I'm sorry," I croaked, trying not to sob out loud, "I...I just...I loved someone when I was younger. His name was Ryu."

I felt Ray's exhale as I held onto him, feeling my hands shake. "He got in trouble sticking up for me...and I tried so hard to find him...but I couldn't track him down. So, I just hoped that if he saw my signature, that if he remembered N&R, that maybe we would find our way to each other again."

I sniffed, hiding my embarrassment in Ray's back, "I...saw your eyes change and it just reminded me of him. He...he's the only person who made me feel like I mattered...and after being with you...my mind blurred. So, I...I'm sorry Ray for being like this. I...I just miss him."

I knew I should let him go but I still clung to his back. I couldn't stop the tears from coming...and I didn't have the courage to face him.

"Ryu," he finally said as my eyes opened in shock, "that's who you said you missed that night. When you had a nightmare."

Well, if I wasn't embarrassed before, I was blushing amidst my tears now.

"I...I—" I started.

Ray cut me off. "His last name, what was it?"

"Taichi...Ryu Taichi."

Ray moved towards me as my arms parted. His figure was blurry amidst my wet eyes, but I felt his hand on my cheek as he brushed away the tears from my eyelids.

"Taichi was my mother's maiden name. That's why Ryu was never found."

I felt my breath catch. Was he...was he telling me that—

"When I was younger, I introduced myself as Taichi. My mother was one of two wives of my father and he cared for her the least."

Ray looked towards the ground, "So, in spite of that, I vowed to never use my birthname, Tacoma. That's why I was always punished, why he looked down on me, and why I was forced into this marriage. I wasn't one of his beloved sons."

So...so that means that he's Yahiko's half-brother?!

"I found out my mother died when I was in juvie My initial sentence was eighteen months but because of my bad table manners, it'd been extended to 36 months. About a year in my father visited me and gave me a choice. Either stay in juvie or take the name Tacoma and become a member of the VG."

Ray looked at me then, his green eyes drowning in sorrow, "I took his offer. A year was enough for me to realize that the world I tried to run from had swallowed me hole."

"Demons," he chuckled, "I'm still trying to confront mine."

Those words...I remembered telling Ryu that years ago. Only...only one person could—

I held my hand out to his face on instinct. I watched his expression change as I stared into his longing eyes.

"You...so, you really are Ryu?"

"I don't have red hair at the moment, I dye it, but—"

I jumped into his chest, hugging him tight: this time it was tears of joy.

"You found me, you really found me! I knew you would!"

Ray, or Ryu, put his hands around me: holding me tight. "Yes, but I'm sorry Niko. The reason I was trying not to say anything...the reason why I hired you was for your own safety."

I pulled away from him, looking up into his eyes as concern and questions swirling in my mind.

"Remember when I mentioned Kizuna's father, the one who was ill. Instead of passing away peacefully, he was killed...and the person who ended his life was your father."

At his words my mind blanked...and the monsters claws took hold of my reality.