“You’re married?”

Rae’s voice was sudden and unexpected from above his head. Ortíz looked up, twisting the wide silver ring band on his left hand. “Yes.”

Her stomach fell. She realized then that she’d come to hold moral expectations of the detective since meeting him. Her mouth opened and she struggled to get out the question, “How long?” 

   Ortíz had a faraway expression on his face, lips tilting slightly in a sad smile. “I only had her for three years before she passed.” The department chief snorted from across the room, reminding her of his presence. “They dated on and off for almost ten years before that, constantly at each other's throats. I always expected to receive a homicide call from them one day. I never bet on your survival, Ortíz.”

The other man chuckled. Rae felt her insides turn, this time for a different reason. He could never be hers, not when his wife had left such a hole in his life. She froze as she caught her train of thought. How deeply had she fallen for him already? Before she killed the new emotions in her fragile heart, Ortíz unclasped the silver chain around his neck and slipped the band from his finger. The ring clinked against his medallion as it slipped through the chain. 

“Never thought I’d see the day,” the chief observed solemnly. He addressed Rae, “He never took off that ring. Went so far as to convince all of us to talk about his wife as if she was still around to scare away anyone that came on too strong. Such a heartbreaker.” 

  Ortíz scowled playfully. “Shut it, Travis. Why are you so talkative today?” 

The chief grinned. “There’s someone you don’t want to scare away now, innit?” He glanced knowingly at Rae. Ortíz hummed in agreement, eyes shining under the bright desk lamp. Rae bit her lip, trying not to smile and swiftly changed the conversation. 

“I need to go. I have a client tonight.” Ortíz nodded to his superior and excused himself, standing to pocket his keys. “I’ll drive you back.” 

   Rae stood frozen and openly stared at him in shock. His brows furrowed in question. “You don’t mind ?” she asked incredulously. “Not at all…? Why, is it really far away? I have the time.” 

   She shook her head. “Just back to Cherry’s place.” He nodded and held out his hand to her like it was the most natural thing in the world. When she gave it to him, he intertwined their fingers and started off for the car. Still processing the fact that the man she was quickly developing feelings for - yet barely knew - was very accepting of her occupation as a sexworker. Her mind went into overdrive, conflicting thoughts bouncing against her skull. 

Was he really so understanding or did he not feel for her what she felt for him? Did he not feel jealousy because he didn’t like her or because he felt he didn’t have the right to since they weren’t in an official relationship? Was he only driving her back because he had brought her or did he feel a sense of obligation to her safety as her hire? She rubbed her temples as she willed the inner voices to shut the hell up.

“What’s bothering you?” Ortíz asked, quickly sparing her a glance as he drove. She shook her head and told him it was nothing. He frowned. “You can tell me anything, Rae. I care about you and if something is wrong, I’ll do what I can to help.” Her heart fluttered at his words as she stared at his concerned profile. “How are you so honest?”

Ortíz grinned. “Lots of my Má’s ass-whoopings. And practicing to make a habit out of it. Saying what I feel leaves little room for confusion and misunderstandings that make life unnecessarily harder.” He reached over and took her hand, resting their intertwined fingers on his warm knee. “Talk to me.” Rae glanced over at the road, stalling. “Don’t you need that hand?” “I’ll take it back if I do,” he replied promptly and kept silent, waiting for her. 

She squeezed his fingers, knowing that if she simply said she didn’t want to talk he’d drop it, but she was encouraged by his confession and wanted to meet him halfway. “Ortíz… you’re okay with my job? I know we haven’t really discussed what this-” she lifted their hands in emphasis, “-is, but I know both of us feel something and I want to know how you feel about me seeing other people.” 

   He faced her as they stopped at a red light. “The only problem I have with your occupation is how dangerous it is… but I know you can handle yourself.” His free hand grazed the gauze around his neck before returning to the steering wheel. “As long as I know that this-” he gently lifted and shook their joined hands like she’d done moments ago, “-is something that you want and are willing to invest in, there is nothing that can make me walk away from you.” 

    Rae swallowed hard, still feeling a strange mix of guilt and hesitance. “You won’t be jealous?” 

A rueful smile played on Ortíz’s lips. “This is a good chance to tell you that my wife was polyamorous. By the way, tell me if you feel uncomfortable with me talking about her. 

    “No! No, I’m okay,” Rae blurted. “I want to know more about her. She was obviously someone very important to you and a big part of who you are.” 

“Yeah, she is,” he replied softly. He cleared his throat. “As I was saying, there was a lot I unlearned to be with her and much I learned to maintain a healthy relationship. I can’t promise you that I’ll never feel jealousy, but I swear to you that if I ever do I’ll tell you straight away and work through it to not feel that way anymore.”

Rae brought the back of his hand to her lips and pressed soft kisses against his knuckles. “You always have the best responses.” He turned into the underground parking lot and parked, turning to kiss her gently. “I mean everything I say. I’ll never lie to you, amor.” 

      “Mm,” she hummed, a teasing smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. “What about you? Did you have other partners when you were with your wife?” Ortíz laughed. “No, it was only ever her for me. I don’t have the capacity to love so many at once.”

“You sure have the stamina to,” Rae winked slyly. The detective rolled his eyes. “Get out of my car.” His voice was rough but playful. She grinned mischievously, knowing her affect on him. She hadn’t let go of his hand yet and when she thought about doing so, she felt a pang of loneliness. She didn’t want to send him off. She decided to be selfish, prodding to find his boundaries. “Will you wait for me in our room? Stay the night?” 

Ortíz swallowed slowly, staring at her intently. ‘Our room’. In his thoughts, he’d referred to the place they had their first time together in the same way, but hearing her say it aloud and knowing that she thought of it the same way did funny things to him. “Yes, I’d love to.”

   Rae beamed and kissed his hand once more before letting go. He followed her to the elevator and undid his cuffs and tie, physically relaxing after his long day. Rae watched him intently and he resisted the urge to reach for her. If he started something now, he wouldn’t be able to finish it. 

   She opened their room and began to shift through the closet, bringing out the pair of black sweatpants he’d left behind and one of her oversized hoodies. “I washed your sweats and you can borrow this hoodie.” He thanked her and stepped out of his shoes before heading to the shower. “Wanna join?” he called out, completely expecting to be rejected but was pleasantly surprised when Rae’s hands pulled his arms free of his button-down from behind. Her cool hands returned and trailed down his shoulders, down his spine, and around his waist.  

    He sighed, loving the feel of her pressed against him and leaned into her. They stood like that for a short while until Rae’s hands began working on his belt. Within seconds, he was completely bare and he stepped into the warm spray of the shower. He turned to watch Rae undress, taking in her long legs, lean torso, and brown eyes which were now on him as she stepped out of her clothing. She walked into the tub and drew the curtain behind her, reaching for his extended hand. He pulled her close, detaching the showerhead to run water over her long hair. She smiled up at him and grabbed his ass. He jumped, startled, and sprayed water down her back. 

   “It’s slippery. I need something to hang onto so I don’t fall.” 

Ortíz grinned wolfishly. “Sure, you’re hanging on tight enough?” 

     “Mm, seems sturdy to me.”

Ortíz hummed, satisfied with her answer and returned his attention to her hair. Surrendering to her hold on him, he didn’t move away as he reached for the shampoo. Rae melted into him as he worked magic on her scalp and she wrapped her arms tightly around his waist when she felt her knees turn to jelly. 

He turned her around after finishing her hair and scrubbed her back, his touch firm and earnest. After completely washing her down, his lips on her skin felt so deliciously warm that her heart swelled. He kissed her nape, her shoulders, and finally her mouth when she turned into him. She pulled away and Ortíz expected to get an eyeful of her as she went, but to his surprise, she began working on him. Rae moved him under the spray and studied his expression.

 “It’s okay for you to expect more,” she insisted softly. 

    Droplets of water fell from the tip of his nose and long lashes as he looked down at her. He only smiled wistfully because he knew that he could never get over how lucky he was to have a second love and he didn’t have the courage to ask for more. Rae studied his expression, somehow reading the guard he’d put up and bit her lip. Ortíz’s hand slid to the back of her neck, which he gripped gently. “You didn’t say anything wrong, amor. Give me time to learn how you want to be loved.” 

Rae smirked and held onto his bicep. “My love language is acts of service.” Ortíz chuckled and kissed her softly. “Mine too.” Her dark brow went up smugly. “I noticed.” Her expression softened then, allowing him to see a vulnerability behind her eyes. His heart felt full at her next words. “Let me take care of you too.” 

He hummed in appreciation, releasing her so she could continue whatever she wanted to do.  Rae soaped up the washcloth once more and took Ortiz’s hand. He watched her intently as she passed the cloth between each of his fingers, to his knuckles, moving upwards in a careful motion. He saw the same caution of her movements in her eyes as they quickly flicked up to his. Ortiz didn’t move, didn’t speak. Hell, he didn’t even know if he was still breathing. Trails of goosebumps were left by her warm touch and the graze of her nails. 

      Rae traced her fingertips over Ortiz’s scars, attention dropping from to the healed bullet wound at his right shoulder down to the one at his left hip. A jagged line of puckered skin rose from above the scar at his hip to just below his rib. Smaller scars littered the rest of his torso, varying in width and shape as well as color, signaling to their age. She wondered at the story behind every one of them, but chose not to form the questions aloud, taking this time to simply explore. A mole at his collarbone, at his shoulder and behind his left ear. Black ink on his left side curved into a series of Mesoamerican rectangular spirals spanning from his upper rib to the curve of his thigh. She remembered their first night together and how the spirals seemed to move with him, mesmerizing in her blissed state. 

    Ortíz’s breath hitched as she turned him around so his back faced her. He shivered at the washcloth at his nape trailing between his shoulders and placed his palms on the wall to steady himself. Rae was just as thorough as he had been. Her teeth grazed his thigh before they were replaced by that damn washcloth. He groaned and prayed she finished soon before he lost the little control he had left. A sigh of relief left his lips as she unhooked the showerhead and sprayed him down. A dark brow rose on Rae’s face as she caught sight of his face after turning him back around. “Looking a bit flushed there, babe.” His ragged sigh turned into a laugh. “I guess this is a taste of my own medicine?” 

   She smiled brightly and leaned close only to return the showerhead to its hook. She didn’t move away though, waiting. He slid an arm around her middle and lowered his mouth onto hers. He kissed her softly and she followed his lead, accepting whatever he gave. When he pulled away, he whispered against her lips, “Thank you.” “You’re welcome,” she whispered back with a sly smile. It quickly faded and a regretful expression replaced it. “I have to go now. I’m sorry I can’t wash your hair.” 

      He pressed his lips against hers once more and said, “That’s okay. You can owe me one.” Rae grinned at the glint in his eyes that promised he’d collect when the time came. “Okay,” she murmured, reluctantly letting go of him and stepping away from his warmth. She cast one last glance behind her before pulling the shower curtain aside and leaving.