“Alright, the camera’s rolling,” the cameraman. “Name, and job please?”
“I’m Katie, a depression rep” she yawned. “Atypical depression. And sorry if I’m not all here… I’ve just been tired lately.”
“It’s alright. I just have a couple questions for the camera and you can go along.”
“Ok.”
“So do you enjoy your job?”
“Enjoy my job? I don’t really know.”
“Well can you explain what you do?”
“I’m the depression voice for this girl in The Living.”
“Alright, and what’s that like?”
“What’s it like? Well… it’s like… it’s ok.”
“Can you give any details?”
“It’s like… I guess I sympathize with her, even if she doesn’t really know me,” she shrugged. “I get the struggles I have to put her through, you know? And those nights when I’m in her dreams and telling her to give up… that’s just how I feel, you know? And some nights we just talk together, no tormenting. I… I don’t log those nights into my paperwork.”
“Interesting… We haven’t really gotten that kind of response before from a rep.”
“I figured,” Katie hazily nodded. “The status quo around The Afterlife is that you basically can’t enjoy your job. But well… I like my host and job. It’s hard to explain really…”
“Any other comments you would like to make?”
“I just wish we had more mental health days,” she sighed. “I don’t like the heartbroken look in my boss’ eyes when she tells me she has to dock my pay because I couldn’t go to work.”
* * * * *
“Is this a good position?” the cameraman asked, readjusting the camera again.
“Here, let me just…” The man jumped off the stool and adjusted the camera into virtually the same position before going back. “There, now it’s ok.”
“Alright, what’s your name and job?”
“I’m Tony, an OCD rep. I believe in, um… an order to things.”
“Alright then, can you tell me about the living conditions in The Afterlife?”
“Well, when you get here you’re given a house to live in. Usually you end up having to room with someone. You gotta request specifically to get one by yourself, and you need to have a good reason too.”
“Do you share a house?”
“Yeah, I do. I can’t recommend you ever meet Jean though. She’s got… a temper. A monster in the morning. And she never puts things back where she found them and drives me crazy. I mean, sometimes she moves things around just to screw with me!”
“Why don’t you live on your own then?”
“I submitted a form and it got lost in the system. Try to go and ask about it, the bosses will just turn you away too! Seems to be how it goes for a lotta things around here.”
“Hm? What do you mean?”
“Nothing,” Tony rolled his eyes. “Well, no, it’s not nothing. I don’t even know who my boss is!”
“You… don’t know your boss?”
“No! I didn’t learn until afterwards that everyone else met their boss immediately when they got sorted and chosen, but when I got picked I just got a handshake and an explanation from Mr. DuCarmont!”
“Do you think that he’s the OCD boss then?”
“Nope. No way. He’s the boss of the entire Afterlife, not a specific disorder. And when I looked into it, he just turned me away!”
“Interesting…”
“Anyway, I gotta go. Mark my words though, some kinda conspiracy’s going on in this industry, and I’m gonna find it out!”
* * * * *
“Do you have a good angle on me?” the woman asked.
“Um, I-”
“You better! I only have so many bad angles, and if you manage to catch one then we’re doing this interview all over again.”
“I think you look beautiful,” the cameraman nodded; mostly so she’d stop pestering him on the camera angle. “So can we have your name and job?”
“Jennifer, but you can call me Jen. I’m a Narcissistic Personality Disorder rep. The best one actually, not to brag or anything. I can grab the papers to prove it-”
“No, no I believe you. Can I ask if your disorder started before or after you became a NPD rep?”
“What disorder?” Jen asked, souring her expression. “There’s nothing wrong with me.”
“Oh- Um, well can-”
“There isn’t anything wrong with me,” she repeated.
“I believe you,” the cameraman said, holding his hands up. “What does the downtime of a rep like you look like?”
“Oh, my time looks phenomenal. I’ve got a girlfriend who loves me, I mean who wouldn’t? I like going to the movies, they’ve got an amazing Starbucks around here, even if the baristas talk back way too much. At least they can make a half decent mocha. Oh, and the clothing stores are just magical here compared to the ones in The Living. I mean, I don’t-”
“I don’t want to interrupt, but I need to move on with my questions,” the man said awkwardly.
“Oh, so you just want me to shut up?! Is that it?!”
“Maybe we can end the interview here-”
“Interview this!” Jen said, picking up the camera.
“No, no, I had to save up for that-”
* * * * *
“Alright, name and job please?”
“Granger, a schizophrenia rep.”
The man sat on the stool, staring into the corners of the room. He was slender and dressed in mostly black leather, with some makeup too. His blonde hair was surprisingly well kept though. The cameraman couldn’t ignore just how much his eyes were darting around. He looked back and saw nothing.
“Is there something-”
“Don’t bother,” Granger interrupted dully. “I can see them but you can’t.”
“See… what?”
“The creatures. The ones that nobody else sees but me.”
“Oh. That sounds…”
“Crazy? I’ve considered I may be. I keep an eye out just in case though.”
“Alright then,” the cameraman coughed. “Let’s just um… get on with the interview then. Do you reps ever get offered treatment for your disorders?”
“Some of us,” he answered, settling his eyes into a corner of the room. “Eating disorders, depressions, self harm, those ones. Others like sleep or psychotic ones don’t get much treatment.”
“So how about you? Do you have any treatment? Or do you want any?”
“I don’t have any and no, I don’t want any. It would just take away from my gift.”
“Your… gift?”
“I told you, seeing things that nobody else can. I’ve got fascinating eyes.”
The cameraman focused the lens a bit more on Granger, who looked directly at the camera. His eye’s irises were a swirling mix of bright pinks, greens, and blues. The cameraman couldn’t help but stare.
“Do you wish that-”
“Stand back!” Granger shouted, jumping to his feet and taking the stool in his hands. “That one’s real!”
“Wait!” the man exclaimed, looking at the empty corner. “There’s nothing-”
“I said back!” he bellowed, throwing the chair at the corner and watching it shatter into splinters.
* * * * *
“Alright, name and job please?”
“…”
The cameraman had tried for minutes to try and get the young man to talk, but he’d said not a word. He was dressed in a set of Pokemon Eevee pajamas and didn’t look enthused to be there. It was a wonder he gave a thumbs up when the cameraman asked.
“It says here your name’s Soli and you’re a rep for the sleep disorders of night terrors and sleepwalking?”
“…”
“So… Can you tell me about your work experience in The Afterlife?”
“…” he stared, voiceless.
“Are you willing to talk about your boss?”
“…”
“What are your opinions of the boss Lucas DuCarmont then?”
“…”
“Is there anything you will say for the camera?”
Soli looked around and opened his mouth.
“Bailey’s dreams are the loudest.”
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