Running away is never the solution, but running back home is the only thing I can think of at the moment, even though my whole body longs to stay there, with her. I've been close enough to her to never forget her, her scent is everywhere, even if I walk away it doesn't fade.
I want to scream, to hit something, to cry, our Goddess moon looks for our happiness, but with me she's always been cruel, now that I found her I can't be with her, she's nothing like I imagined, nothing I've ever heard that could happen, it's not possible? It can't be.
Just a few meters from my home, I see my mother talking with Jasmine, steven and rossy with her son in her arms. They feel my presence and turn to look at me, I must look terrible so their expressions only show concern. I want to get closer but my instinct just wants to go back to her.
-Son, what's wrong? -She asks me through our connection.
-I have to go, I'm going to visit Evie for a few days, can you take care of the herd in the meantime? -I answer in kind.
-Come on, let's talk.
-Take care of them.
Without more to say I run, I run as fast as I can, far away from her, where I can't feel her presence.
-Yes, don't worry, we do what we can -I hear my sister talking to someone- She doesn't talk much, she just stays thinking in silence or disappears almost all day long... I'm worried, I've never seen him like that, he's like... disturbed, I don't know.
I was looking for my nephew, when I heard his conversation, with who I guess is our mother.
I arrived a couple of days ago, they opened the doors of their house to me, but I don't really want to talk to anyone, I know they are worried, but no one should know my secret, they would only take me away from her? I wish I didn't know... I think so.
-I'm worried about you too," Noah is surprised from behind.
-I didn't feel you coming.
-You've been distracted lately.
He averts his gaze in another direction.
-Come on, let's talk.
I follow him out of the house, into the woods, just walk, Noah's never been one to ask a lot of questions. Until now I guess.
-At first I thought something bad had happened to you, that you were in danger, but then I thought "He'd never run away from a fight."
-I just need to think.
-And being in the library most of the day and night.
-You've been spying on me?
If my best friend and brother-in-law came in the middle of the night, with a look of terror on his face that I've never seen in my many years of life, wouldn't you do the same?
-I have some things to research and your library is one of the largest and oldest.
-Tell me what you're looking for and I'll help you.
-No, you can't.
-Why not?
I keep silent and just keep walking.
-Hey," he stops me with his hand on my shoulder, "it's not common that you can't tell me something important, we've always supported each other, haven't we?
-Now you can't.
-Why not? We're friends," he asks already more angry.
-First you're the king.
This was a staring war, how could I tell him? He's the king, he must enforce the law, he can't just ignore them because of our friendship, it's not fair. I would never put him in that position.
-We're friends, we've always supported each other.
-Now you're king, you have a responsibility.
-But...
-No one's in danger, I promise, not me, not our family, don't worry and don't ask any more questions.
I transformed and ran away.
I know that my words hurt her, but it's for her sake, mine and above all hers.