(Warning: Cringey Content, I will Mess With Your Feelings in This One, Talks About Violence)

[Previously: "Yeah it must be really hard for you to see down here.” San soothes. “We mean once we are able to light lanterns.”

I smile a little and then start over, “Even if you were to light a lantern I wouldn’t be able to see, I’m visually impared.” I wait for them to get it but they are quiet. “I’m blind.”

“Oh.” Kal says first, “I think I now understand why you have been so calm, up till now.”]

There’s a long drawn out second and then San breathes in happily, “This means you are safe!” Kal gets it and then starts going, “No. No. No. No!” “Guys,” I start. They start arguing rapidly in German and I have to give up. I sink down a little in the water, rubbing my neck gently. “I was seen.” I finish mostly for myself. The two freeze. The fear in San’s voice makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up. “Do you know who saw you?” “They attacked me.” San shocks me by checking me over quickly, finally noticing the bruising on my neck which should be fading rapidly in the water. I continue, “Then when they noticed I was,” I gesture to my eyes, “Like this, they said they couldn’t kill me but could use me and that they’d be back when I was healed.” 

San breathes out slowly. “Kal go back to the village, I’m going to take the blame for this one.” I hear a small scuffle when he tries to protest. “No! Kal! Listen to me!” I feel Kal trip backwards, his body brushing by mine, “Go or I will never forgive you!” 

“San.” Kal’s voice breaks a little. 

“I will be okay I promise.” San whispers. I hear Kal run away. Confused, I don't understand how this changed things so much that Kal would be willing to abandon San, especially after all that, ‘I’ll protect you,’ talk. San whimpers quietly. He lays down beside me and I ask, “What’s going to happen?” San lets out a soft sob, “I may not be banished but there are worse things, the leader knows and he will give me a harsh punishment.” Before I can ask, San starts crying and I shush up until I think of something, “What if you went back to the village, I could say I don’t know who saved me.” “The leader already has my scent probably. Since I was the one that carried you, I will get into more trouble if I try to hide it.” He starts crying again, “I’m going to lose my horns.” ‘Lose his horns?!’ I reach out in hopes to comfort him, “What if I say I forced you?” San shakes his head no. “Or you abandon me in the caves somewhere?” He shushes me and hugs me. After a long, long time I realize he’s just waiting for the inevitable. 

I wrack my brain for a way to fix this, “San, let’s leave.” I start getting up. Slowly, letting out a trembling breath, I leave the water. I close my eyes from lightheadedness but even though I lost my balance I feel amazing! “San get up.” I whisper urgently, reaching for him whilst on my knees, “I need your help!” I fumble around blindly and then I guess he moved away from me because he’s not where he was laying before. “San?” I ask quietly with fear. I don’t know why he’s not saying anything but I hope he won’t be able to stay silent if I start wandering. I take a few tentative steps, regaining my sense of touch since one of my shoes is missing. I lean down, taking the other one off. The stone is harsh against the soles of my feet but after being in the water so long it feels good to have a firm sense of ground. I reach out my hand and walk forward slowly, hoping to find a cave wall. 

“Where are you going?” San asks finally. He’s a few feet in front of me and to the right from the sound of it. 

“You told Kal you’d be fine, why did you lie to him?” I demand. I don’t get a response and start walking, wincing when I bump my shin against some rocks. “San,” I reach out my hand, “Keep your promise, run away with me, I’ll keep you safe.” If I focus I can hear him breathing, I walk towards it carefully. “San, I won’t let them hurt you, I will fight back and probably get myself killed.” I laugh a little unhinged. “If we go back to where I’m from, I know some people that will help me hide you from your tribe, they won’t care that you have horns.”

“I can never leave the caves.” I hear from behind me. I turn around.

“You don’t have to,” I say, touching his arm and moving my hand down so it’s in his. “They know the caves up there,” I point upwards, “They’ll know plenty of places to hide you.” I pull his hand and to my immense relief he takes a step forward. My heart floods with relief and the sick feeling of anxiety fades.

The sound of multiple “people” approaching draws my attention, at the same time San tenses. “Good job, Kal, you did the right thing telling me about this betrayal of the tribe.” A familiar deep and authoritative voice says. I shiver in fear. San buries his face in me hyperventilating. “Sanftesherz!” The voice booms and I feel San press himself deeper into me for a second before lifting his head, “Kal,” his voice shakes, “What is this, you promised you would keep it a secret!” His acting is so good I wonder if this was not actually the plan. 

The chief approaches and then to me says, “You should be all healed by now, considering you’re no longer in the water we will find a use for you but first, San…you’re to be banished, but first defanged and dehorned.” I hear San keen, his hands grip my own until it’s painful. ‘This could all be in their language but they’re speaking so I can understand, which means this all for my “benefit”, what should I do, what can I do?” “No.” I start and San gasps covering my mouth. The leader's chuckle is dangerously dark, “Did it just speak?” San hesitantly uncovers my mouth and I gasp, “I don’t want him to be punished for saving my life.”

“You should have been left to die.” The leader sneers.  

“You would leave your own kind’s disabled, wounded and for dead?!” There’s stunned silence. The leader crouches not even trying to call my bluff, was it even much of that? 

“You are not our kind.” He growls confusedly. 

“No, but I would have done the same for any of you!” I exclaim, again causing a murmur among the tribe members.

The chief grunts and then says loudly for the rest of the tribe to hear, “But instead of leaving you where he found you, and getting me, Sanftesherz decided to put the safety of his entire village at stake by not only saving you but interacting and talking to you, he even let you touch him. Now you know we are not human. Your kind will swarm our tunnels in search of you. If you were just a body to be found they would take you and leave but now we will have to move, close off the entrances and risk being found and annihilated by your kind.” He crouches down next to me and I flinch realizing I hadn’t heard him move. The leader lifts my head with his giant hand, “And you don’t want him to get a single punishment for that?” I feel my lip quiver. “Do you really think you are worth that much?” Guilt and trauma threaten to make me shut down. “I’m half tempted to crush your skull,” He seethes, squeezing the tiniest bit. I wince as he withstands. “But even I am held to the law.” 

“You, you’re wrong.” I croak quietly. My brain thinks of the most outrageous lie. Surprising the gathered tribe, “I have been sacrificed by my kind to yours. I have no human life anymore. I can never return to the ones that love me.” I cover my eyes with my arm to hide any emotions. I wrack my brain, “I, I know you don’t like strangers-” 

“We don’t like,” the Chief chuckles, “We normally remove their heads from their bodies on sight.” I remember the Leader's threat towards me. ‘Disrespectful people will get punished.’ I push it anyway.  

“So aren’t you the one putting your tribe in danger?” I flinch when the Chief roars in anger. 

“My people already know about you!” I cower expecting to be hit, when I’m not I carefully continue, “Yet they have not tried to wipe your…clan out.” I point to myself, “They are even so afraid of your murderous kind that they sent you a sacrifice,” I look past the chief hoping to make eye contact with the other tribe members, “and I’m not the only one. A gift of peace. To try to quell the beasts.” The clan chief grips me tighter, then turning to San asks, “Is this true?”

San being honest gasps, “I didn’t know.” I feel the chief’s grip relax slowly on me. “We will need to reevaluate your punishment.” He says to San. “There’s some surprising information from this one.” He pokes me. I flinch. “Send someone to see if the information he said is true, do the humans know of us? Are they actually afraid of us? Why do they think gifts will do anything?”

“The gifts are to ask you to kill us and not them.”

“So should I kill you?” He asks and I tremble lips turning pale from lack of blood as color drains from my face. I know their law is supposed to protect me. “I am only a gift.” I whisper hoarsely. “I belong to your tribe now and you can do to me as you wish.” The chief hesitates with his hand on my face which he slides under my chin. Then he picks me up so he can look at me closer. I grab his hand struggling, ‘how is he able to lift me one handed?!’ I guess my fear as I pant and kick at the air calms whatever fears and suspicions he has left. 

“Leave him here, we don't need gifts from humans.” One of the villagers speaks up for the first time. “He’ll starve to death.” One of the others protests.

“That’s the point,” he mutters under his breath.

“Enough.” The leader says, “His words will be evaluated for lies and if he hasn’t tried to deceive we will do what we’ve always done with disabled. He will be taught our ways and treated like the others.” He places me down and turns. I feel Sanft come up behind me and take my arm, silently. He leads me after the tribe. I can’t figure out if he’s angry at me. ‘Does he know that I am lying to try to give us a chance to run away? Or is he just angry that I deceived him?’

     Sanftesherz’s head reels from the possibility that the fear he had his whole life could have been a lie. ‘The humans weren’t going to wipe them out as soon as they found out they existed.’ He looks at the blind human remembering the words he spoke when he woke up, ‘He was made to fall, by his step-mother, and it caused him great distress. So he must not have wanted to be a sacrifice. Obviously that makes sense, because he didn't want to die. I wonder if he’s lived his whole life worried that we would wipe the humans out? Maybe that’s why he checked for horns so suddenly and even though he suspected they were there he responded with fear.’ He said there were more like him, ‘Did he lose family or friends before as sacrifices?’ San looks back the way that Ray had fallen and wonders what would have happened if he had gone with him. ‘He said that there were humans who knew the caves, that didn’t care that he had horns and would protect him. That does sound like worshipers but to sacrifice to something that terrifies you…’ He winces at the thought and Ray looks up, his eyes filled with worry. “Are you okay?” He asks. 

“Yes.” Sanft says. 

“Where are we going?” Ray whispers, turning his head the slightest bit as if he’s listening to every little noise. ‘I assume he already knows we’re going back to the village, maybe he wants a more specific location.’

“We’ll be held as prisoners until they decide whether they can believe you or not.”

He tenses up a little, “What happens if they decide they don’t believe me?” 

“Nothing good.” San responds looking at Ray closely but he turns back so his face is hidden.