-What? It's not possible, what are you even talking about?

-Dad he is ill has cancer and unfortunately nothing can be done.

Tears were pouring down my cheeks my voice was trembling and I felt like I couldn't move my arms or legs.

-But why didn't you tell me?

-Dad wanted your last moments together to be happy, not sad, it was very hard for him too, but he got over it. It was his decision and I had to respect it, which wasn't easy for me either, because I had to pretend that everything was fine, even when he felt bad, he pretended that everything was fine so that you didn't have to worry about him just to be happy. For him the most important thing is your happiness.

I didn't know what to say I tried to put together in my head what was just happening but I couldn't it was too heavy.

-Come on darling, we're going to Dad's so he doesn't spend these last moments alone.

I got in the car and we drove off. On the way I didn't say a word, I was stunned, I couldn't let go of the thought that my dad, whom I love so much, would soon die and that I would never play basketball or monopoly with him again. Mum was silent too. It took forever to get to the hospital, but we finally arrived, and as soon as we entered I felt a cold and paralysing sensation spread over my body, a feeling I would never wish on anyone. The doctor led us to my dad, we were about to enter his room but then all my emotions exploded.

-Mama I can't go in there, I don't want to watch him die!!!!!!!!!

-I know honey and I understand that. We did the wrong thing by not telling you sooner and I'm so sorry for that.

-What will we do without him?

-I don't know honey, but we have to be strong. Please let's go in to see Dad, he's scared too and we need to be there for him and support him, this could be our last time together.

-Good

We went into the Hall, Dad was lying there and didn't resemble at all the man I had known since.

-Stephen, we're with you

-Emiliy, Jake?

-Yes dad we are here

-I'm sorry son it was my fault

-No dad it's not your fault, I'm the one who should apologise for not supporting you, We'll stay here with you for the night so you're not scared

-Thanks

-Maybe have a drink or something to eat?

-No thanks, I'll just get some sleep

-Okay dad, good night

I tried not to show my dad how scared and heartbroken I was. He needed the peace and support of his family now, and if he saw me and mum drenched in tears he might feel worse. It doesn't matter what we feel now he is the most important.

After a couple of hours of sitting by my dad's bed, my mum fell asleep, she was tired of it all too, and I wanted to stay up all night and be by my dad's side but around four in the morning I fell asleep too.

After about an hour we were woken by a loud alarm. Doctors and nurses came running into Dad's room. We did not know what was happening. They led us out of the room and after a few minutes the doctor came out.

-I'm very sorry, Mr Foster is dead

My mum and I were completely distraught, she hugged me and we both started crying.

All I heard was Mum's quiet voice

-Silently, quietly love quietly

That day I felt as if a part of me had died together with my dad. I couldn't believe that Dad died just when we were sleeping, as if he didn't want us to see it and waited until we were asleep.                                He took care of us until the end.

Mum didn't want us to stay in the hospital she talked to the doctor for a while we went home. Nobody n us said anything mum went to her room and I went to mine, I lay down on my bed and started crying again. It was all like one big nightmare for me, I hoped I would wake up soon and my dad would come into my room, I was crying more and more every moment. I remembered all the last moments with my dad that we spent together.

After 10 minutes, my mum came into my room and lay down next to me.

-How do you feel, darling

I couldn't even say a word, I just hugged her and she wiped away my tears.

-I miss him too. He will always be in our hearts.

(Notifications on the phone)

Peter

And how what happened

Peter

Jake all right?

5x missed call

Peter

Jake I beg you to tell me what is going on

8x missed calls

Peter

Are you there? Tell me what's going on. I'm worried

The next day

Peter

Will you be at school today?

Peter

If you don't write anything by 10 or give any sign of life I'm going to you

Peter

Okay enough, I'm coming to you

Mum was with me all night. In the morning we sat on the sofa in the living room and watched TV. Some comedy, she wanted to make me feel better somehow because she knew how hard it was for me to come to terms with my dad's death.

We weren't saying anything just staring at the TV when suddenly someone started banging hard on the door to the house, mum went to see who it was and suddenly I heard Peter's voice.

-Pete is that you?

-What's going on with you? I've been trying to call you since yesterday and nothing. You tell me what's going on.

-I'm sorry.

Peter said nothing he came up to me hugged me and asked quietly

-What's going on?

-My dad, my dad is dead- -Then I started to cry again and he embraced me more strongly and I felt that tears were also falling from his eyes.

-Sorry Jake, I'm so sorry I yelled at you.

Mum covered us with a blanket and sat down next to us. And Peter asked

-Maybe you want some tea?

-Not just be with me

-I will always be with you