…It’s weird… I always thought café romance was only in fiction. Guess I was wrong. I guess romance is kinda everywhere. I mean like, couples. Latest encounter I had was on the train back from visiting Charlie and Tim in the dormitories. It’s kinda interesting my brother chose to stay in the QUAD apartment that’s mostly used for the college students but I guess cuz Tim stayed there and Mrs. Silverwood or Tim’s family convinced him to stay there with Tim, for his comfort. But it’s nice they got the three bedroom suite, I could have stayed over as sleep in the third bedroom but I didn’t pack any spare clothes
But back on track. I remember riding the train back after my visit and I just watched a real weird couple on the train. Where I was seated, I was looking at the side of them. I watched the girlfriend do some ear play with her boyfriend. I don’t want to go into detail. All I want to say I got off ASAP from that train to get on the next train on line 2.
I guess couples have different ways of displaying their love for each other - some just cuddle and hold hands… and some others just do their kinks in public.
But back to the topic of the trope of café romance being real, I’ve been a regular at The Burrow [Toby’s fam’s Café] and it’s safe to say. Yeah. Pretty real. I may be nose-deep in a good book that Toby’s library has to offer but it doesn’t mean that I’m not aware of what’s happening around me.
I’ve mastered the art of People watching over my lifetime. I don’t know if I started it as a habit to figure out how to fit in or if it was picked up from Charlie from spending a bit too much time with him. All I know is that I sometimes vicariously live through the people I watch.
---
I looked to the side as Hal and Toby chatted, taking more interest in the couple sitting near the front. They were sitting so close to each other that their shoulders were touching, holding hands on the table as they spoke quietly, writing stuff down in a notebook. I took notice of another couple waiting for their drinks. They were wearing matching scarfs and hats since it was starting to get chilly times of the fall season. The girl has her arms wrapped around her boyfriend’s neck, the two giving each other small pecks on the lips and exchanging quiet ‘I love you's to each other.
---
…Maybe it’s kinda creepy that I spend so much time living my life through other people. It’s not only couples exclusively. I do it to anyone that I envy. Families, groups of friends, etc. etc. Sometimes I find myself watching Hal and Toby.
I’m not proud that I do so many people watching as if I was watching animals in the wild, taking in everything about them. I just wonder what it’s like sometimes. To be normal and functional. To fall in love with someone so hard that you just fall without any fear or caution… To actually feel emotions other than being numb like me. I guess it must be nice.
---
I kept my eyes on the people around me, writing in my journal. I snapped out of my daze when Hal waved his hand over my vision.
“Cessair, Toby has been trying to get your attention for over a minute.” Hal called out as I turned my attention to the two.
“I was asking if you want me to refill your drink or want any snacks in the house.” Toby said with a soft smile.
I shook my head in response. “No, not that hungry…”
“Then let me just get you more coffee, okay?” Toby said, taking my empty mug. I didn’t even realise I'd already finished my drink. Guess I was just that deep in my habit.
“It’s kinda cool you can write without looking, wish I could do that… would be real helpful when I’m on table duty- Ow!” Toby's tone shifted from a gentle one to a hiss as he glared at Hal.
Hal on the other hand was giving him this look as if they were communicating without any words.
“Geez, fine. I’ll refill your drink too…” Toby sighed, taking Hal’s mug and leaving us alone.
There was silence between us, I watched Hal carefully. He was waiting for Toby to get out of earshot before he spoke.
“What’s bothering you?” He asked, his attention now on me.
“What?”
“You’ve been really disconnected with us again, you’re just staring off. As your unofficial older brother, tell me what’s wrong.”
I exhale at Hal’s words, “Since when were you my unofficial older brother?”
“Don’t avoid my question. I've tried to pull you into the conversation multiple times but you were just in your own bubble.”
I let out a soft sigh. “I just have a habit of just zoning out in public places is all… Like, I’m just kinda watching how other people interact.”
“So, you people watch?”
“Yeah… I guess that's the term.” I shrugged, pretending I've never heard the term before. “I dunno… guess I’ve always done it. Pretty sure you caught me at some point in elementary.”
Hal chuckled softly, “I remember. You were watching the kids play during recess and you were sitting in the outdoor learning area.” He recounts with a smile.
“I’m surprised you remember.”
“But there’s one thing I never understood. Why do you people watch?”
I sat there in hesitation. ‘It’s better to say it then just keep it to myself… What's the worst that could happen?’
“‘Cause it lets me have the things I know I couldn’t never have, Hal… that’s why.”
Hal just gave me a soft smile and tilted his head a bit at me, “Cessair… whatever you think you don’t have, you probably do. You just don’t know it. Who knows, it can just be waiting for the right time to just come into your life.”
I exhale at Hal's words, “Right… the right time to happen…”
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