The Stranger Of The Family.
Like always, I live my life. I wake up in the morning, decide what will I do today, killing myself, or a cup of tea, or a cup of coffee.
I iron my uniform, I walked to the school, and study. And go home, this repeat, everyday, I didn't dislike living this way, I am grateful, that I have things to do that make me forget killing myself, because of the meaningless world.
But your routine in life, will change depends on your fate.
Hikari approached me as I was putting all my stuff inside my bag "Ne, Asahi-kun should we walk together?"
"Sure, why not." I know Hikari have the guilt inside of her, I know she trying to want move on, but I know the guilt will remain inside at her heart.
Therefore, as were walking at the corridor at the end of it. Inasuki-sensei is waiting for someone and so. "Asahi, can I walk with you?" She asked me.
I looked at Hikari. "Am sorry, Hikari looks like you will walk alone for today." I said to her.
"No, its fine. Well see you tomorrow." And so she leave us.
"Looks like you found your best friend." Inasuki-sensei said to me.
"Maybe, so should we discuss it here or?" I asked.
And so were walking at the street.
But Inasukis-sensei stop to the bending machine she get a can of coffee.
"Here." She gave me, and so she sit in the parking railing.
"So what have we discussing about?" I asked her.
She opened her can, and drink on it. "Your mother, do you have any news from her?" She asked me.
"No, all I know she was working, and giving me an allowance enough to make me survive, even though I didn't see her. But this past month, I didn't receive, so I was doing part-time So?" I asked her.
Inasuki-sensei, took a deep breath, and said something. "Your mother... Your mother have cancer."
As I heard that, I turned toward the landscape of blue sea and sky and walked away. And I said, "I see. Well Inasuki-oneesan, see you tomorrow."
I walked towards the street, like nothing happened.
After that, I arrived home, I drop my bag, and suddenly jump to my couch without changing my uniform, my back of my hands is at top of my nose bridged I stared at my ceiling.
Is this a work of fate?
Suddenly my door ring, I stand up from my couch, and opened my door, suddenly a familiar face is what I see.
"Did you heard about your mother?" He is a man, wearing a suit, you know this man is working to an company.
"Yeah, I heard about it." I said to him.
"I want to talk with you about it, Kuromi." He said to me.
"I see, then we talk outside." I said to him.
In the cold of night, the starry sky.
As were walking, we stop at the playground.
He is my father, he left us, when I didn't know how to speak nor walk, I didn't care what this about, because this is not surrounded me, but if for my mother, I will do anything.
My father grab his pack of tobacco, and light it up, and inhale it.
"Your mother, you heard of it?" He asked me.
"Yeah, mother bestfriend told me." I said.
I asked him, a question, that my mother want to know either. "Father why did you left me, or mother?"
He looks at me, and said this. "When I married your mother, I was a member of a gang syndicate, that job, keep you living and your mother, but I realized, what I am doing, is wrong, your mother known about it, she was worried for her family you. That's why she cut ties with me, so I didn't have chance to see you... Do you hate me for it?"
"But either of those, I don't care about the past, what I care is for my mother only." I said to him.
And so, he begun to tears. "I-If I didn't left, this will never happened."
"What happened, already happened, all we need to do, is live and accepted it." I said to him.
With that, I walked away. And left him behind.
I arrived home, and sleep.
After school, I visited mother, in the hospital with Inasuki-oneesan.
We arrived at the door of the room, of my mother.
"Are you sure you want to see her." Inasuki-oneesan said to me.
"Yeah, I want to talk to her." I said
And so, we entered inside, I saw my mother laying in the bed, look pale and weak.
"Okaa-san, long time no see." I said to her.
My mother cry, I walked close and hugged her.
She is crying in my shoulder, I was patting her back.
"Kuromi, I am sorry.. I am sorry that I left you alone, I am sorry, that I didn't show my face to you even though I giving you allowance, I am sorry! I was afraid that if I show my face to you, you will say to me, if I am your mother, why would I hide my face, and he you hated me. I am sorry! I am sorry that I am crying, I am a weak person"
"Okaa-san, its okay, crying is not a sign of being weak, its a sign of being genuine. I forgive you. I am not anger, that you hide yourself from me. Even your not with me, I can feel your love for me." I said to her as I was patting her back.
She looks into my face, and raise her rights hands, and put in to my side cheek, she was smiling and crying looking at me..
And so, we have a conversation of my daily life, and the thing happened to me.
"Did you have a girlfriend?" My mother asked me.
"Hmm. Yeah, I don't know when, yesterday or last month, I forget it." I said to my mother.
"Ehh, so you broke up." My mother said to me.
"Yeah, but I have a bestfriends." I said to her.
"Really! That's good." Mother said to me.
"But were really opposite." I said to her.
"How come?" Mother Asked me.
"Well, think about her, as an girl who have an aura of flowers, and sunshine, and think about me, as an gloomy aura." I said to her.
And so, she laughed at me.
"Want to see her?" I asked her.
"Sure why not." She said
And so, I messaged Hikari to meet me at the hospital.
"Are you Asahi-kun mother? Nice to meet you, Am Hikari Matsuri." And so Hikari aura is leaking again.
"Ara~ What a bright lady you are." She said to Hikari.
And so, they talked to each other, even I joined them.
This task been added, to my daily life, after school I headed to my mother and talked to her.
A few months have passed, my mother condition become worse, the doctor said to me, with Inasuki-oneesan, that my mother have a month to live.
I headed inside the room, and so mother sure becoming weaker, than last month.
I hold her hands.
She put her other hands in my cheek, and said. "Maybe I will enjoy in the heaven. Kuromi, don't lose faith, when I am gone, believe on him." His mother said to him.
I just hugged her.
A month have passed, as the last day of my visited, my mother is flat line. They trying to bring back mother, but its over my mother passed away..
Outside the hospital I was sitting in the stair of the front of the hospital.
Inasuki-neesan approached me, from behind. "I-I am sorry about your mother."
I looked towards the landscape of blue sea and sky. Raising a finger toward the heavens I said, "You see. He says nothing."
"Asahi...Maybe she is at heaven right now." Inasuki said to me, and sound worried for me.
"What a child thing to say, so all the innocent will die now, and go to the sky? That's sound like, that all the innocent and good, who is suffering from illness should die right now, don't gave them time to recover, just kill them and go to heaven... My mother, anyhow was innocent, and good mother to me, and you know it as well as I do, I am not anger at anybody. See you tomorrow in school." I said
Therefore, I walked away, and headed home.
A few days have passed, a later have arrived to me, and its a funeral letter from my mother side family.
I am not close to this family nor to my father family side.
I arrived at the funeral, all of my mother friends, and family are crying and weeping, but me. Am just sitting there.
In my far right, I heard heard a gossip.
"Is he the son of Nanami? Why his not crying? And he looks not showing sympathy, and empathy. He likes some kind of stranger in the family."
And so were on, my mother being lowered to the ground.
All of them cry, they all throw their flowers.
And so I throw mine too. I can't cry, I can't be happy, I can't be sad, I can't be grateful, I can't feel a thing, all I can do is face your coffin mother.
I walked away after I thrown mine, and leave the funeral.
A weeks have passed, I been hated by my family for what I have done.
But I didn't care at all about it.
I am no longer human to them, I am just a stranger to them, and they are stranger to me.
What I have learned, life is an absurd and meaningless, but I will continued to live, as a human being. Thank you mother, and goodbye.
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