“I didn’t reject you, I’m just concerned.” Danny started to undress and wiggled in under the covers. He shushed him every time he tried to argue and cuddled him until he fell asleep. It was clear he was going to have to wrap things up better with Darren at this rate, or Jason was going to become consumed by his fear of being alone.

Danny had a vague idea why he was afraid so much, having touched the topic once before. Jason, who had been resigned to giving up on life, found himself lost trying to find his place in it now. Now that there was more time and Danny knew how he felt, there was no ledge he could use as a safety in case of rejection or betrayal.

While he didn’t understand why he had those types of feelings, he knew they were always within the front of his thoughts. He needed to console him best he could until he trusted him enough to accept that this was the life he had chosen, not another.

As he looked down at Jason sleeping silently, he wondered what was in store for them. He regretted waiting ten years to start their relationship now, wishing he had started it sooner. The more he thought about it, the more he knew that going backwards just wasn’t in the cards for him.

***

“I’m glad you decided to meet up with me,” Darren gestured. Danny had decided the local bakery was the best option. He already told Jason ahead of time and his reaction was less than appealing. Having called him to set up a time and place at both their conveniences was a nightmare. How could Darren ever think they could work?

“Look, let’s get this over with okay? You asked me to meet with you once, and I only came here for closure. What was between you and me is over, there is nothing there anymore.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

Darren shook his head slightly, nodding and impatient. “You’re actually planning on staying with that guy? He’s got one foot out the door.” Danny glared at him, clearly not appreciating his remarks.

“Look, I’m sorry about before, when we met again and how I acted. I was just flustered, I didn’t know how to react at all.”

“So that gives you the excuse to make the remarks you did to Chris and then stalk my parents to my house?”

Darren gave him a ridiculous look. “Come on Danny, we used to be best of friends.”

“Yeah, until you fucked me and left me in your empty bed, in your empty house, with instructions to leave the house unlocked for the movers. Plus, you didn’t even try to explain moving halfway across the world!”

“How was I supposed to tell you?”

“I don’t know, just say, Danny my family is moving?”

“Come on Danny, things were shit between us. What happened that night was something that happened between two remarkably young kids. I’m older now, I’m more responsible and capable.”

“Doesn’t seem like it, since you can’t seem to even stay in one country.”

“I’m sorry, okay?”

“For which part, cheating on me without at least dumping me first or leaving me high and dry twice?”

“All of it, I’m sorry for all of it.”

The both remained silent, slowly sipping on their coffee. Danny let himself getting lost in thought for a moment, watching people walk by on the street.

“I have no intention of getting back with you. Just because you came back here, it doesn’t give you the right to barge back into my life. I have Jason now, and what happens between us has nothing to do with you. It’s none of your business.”

“You’re only going to get hurt.”

“I think between you and him, you did more damage at this point. Plus, at least he choose me in the end instead of abandoning me like you did.” His point hit home, and Danny stood from his seat. “I think were done here. Try to move forward with your life, not backward. Please, don’t contact me or my family anymore and avoid our doctor appointments. It’s not good for Jason to see you.”

Danny went home, not even hesitating looking back. He realized he needed that more than he thought, but his need to see Jason was immense. It was like a consuming feeling deep inside him, he needed to be with him at that exact moment.

When he arrived home, Jason was making a sandwich in the kitchen. He looked sad, sullen almost. Danny stalked towards him, his fast approach catching Jason off guard. He didn’t even wait for him to put the sandwich down, just lifted him up and kissed him passionately while making his way to the bedroom.

Making love to him, was the only thing he knew how to do to get his feelings across. His words were always tangled, his thoughts always moving too fast for his mouth to follow. Taking his frustration out on him sexually was the only way he could vent.

Afterwards, when they lay in bed with the covers wrapped around their entangled bodies, he cuddled against his chest in comfort. Jason stroked his hair patiently, his chin gently resting on the top of his head.

“Everything okay?” Jason asked.

“Yeah, I just really love you. I hope you know that.” He felt Jason’s lips against his forehead briefly, before resting back to where his chin was. “Yeah, I know.”

***

They didn’t see Darren again, and life moved on. The months passed by, their celebrations becoming more and more meaningful and celebratory. It was during Christmas week that they visited the local bakery, where Danny always got pastries for Jason, that Jason came to realize something baffling.

They walked up to the counter, ready to order, when Jason noticed a picture of an old man on the wall.

“Excuse me, who is that?” he asked the cashier. Danny was unsure why Jason had asked, but he assumed he had a good reason.

“Oh, that’s my grandfather. He left me this place, he was the once who taught me how to bake. He was the chess champion for quite a while in the neighborhood until he passed away. Old man died in his sleep, better death than most.”

“Is that so?” he mumbled.

“Why do you ask?” she pressed.

“Oh, I just met him once.” Both the cashier and Danny were surprised, it was a chapter of his life Danny didn’t know about. One of those passing moments that seemed trivial at the time. “We had quite the conversation.”

“About what?

“Life. Choices. I was wracked with guilt at the time and he consoled me.”

“Sounds like something he would do, my grandpa was always like that, looking after others. Here’s your pastry, it’s on the house.”

“You don’t have to do that.”

“No, really, consider it a thank you for a good story.”

“Thanks.”

She smiled as they walked away, the line of customers moving up. He smiled to himself, remembering the old man and his advice about Danny. He was really glad he had that encounter, if he hadn’t he wouldn’t have been able to accept help from Danny at all.

“You got any other secrets I should know? I feel like people are popping out everywhere.” Jason laughed, happiness fluttering inside him.

“I don’t know, I guess we will find out right?” Danny shook his head, a small smile playing on his lips. Today was a good day, should he do it today?

Danny looked up at the sky, it’s clear and sunny rays breaking through between the clouds. Even for it being so close to Christmas, it was relatively nice.

“What are you thinking about?” Jason asked, eyeing him as he sipping on his latte.

“You.”

A slight smirk crossed his face, not giving away his embarrassment completely. It seemed Jason had gotten used to his flirty and random remarks recently. Guess he needed to do something to take that look off his face.

So when Christmas morning rolled around, they began to open their presents. Jason, like the well attending lover he was, got him everything he desired. Danny, had gotten him something completely unexpected. He hoped his reaction would be different compared to what happened last time, not wanting to start a new chapter in their lives with something so forced.

“What is this?” he joked, shaking a huge box from side to side, nothing sounding inside.

“Why don’t you open it and find out?” he teased, letting Jason start to unwrap the wrapping paper.

Once he got past the first layer, it was another box. So he unwrapped that one to find another box, and then another and another, until he was close to the bottom and he began to get really annoyed.

“Seriously Danny? Is there anything actually in here?”

“There is,” he smiled happily. Jason wanted to smack that smirk on his face until he came face to face with a little blue box. What was this, another battery prank?Danny had given him a battery in a tiny box on April Fool’s Day, making him actually believe it was something else entirely. Though they were in college at the time, he had taken it seriously. Hence, this was the reason why he was hesitating so much.

“Why did you stop, aren’t you going to open it?” Danny dared, the humor still in his eyes.

“This isn’t another battery prank, is it?” Danny blinked, not registering until he started bursting out laughing. Out of all things to remember at that moment, that’s what he remembered?

“Hey! Don’t laugh at me!” He stopped his laughing, trying to control himself.

“I’ll let you in on a secret then, if you want to know?” Jason gave him a questionable look, feeling like he was being tricked once more.

“What?”

“It wasn’t a battery, at least originally.” Jason was going to remark something sarcastic, but the look on Danny’s face made him pause. “I chickened out at the last minute. That’s the original present I got you. I found it among your things and have been holding onto the box since you still had it. Aren’t you curious, what the real present was back then?”

Jason felt his heart start to race for some reason, his face flushing a bit and his ears turning red. This wasn’t what he thought it was, right? This was another joke, it had to be. After the debacle of his proposal last time, he wouldn’t ever expect him to do such a thing.

“What are you waiting for, aren’t you going to open it?” He swallowed his anxiety and reached for the lid. Why was he so nervous? It was either a prank or a small trinket or something. There was no way that…

He dropped the box, startled. “Wow, okay, I wasn’t expecting that reaction. Should I not have?”

He stared down at the box on the coffee table, his whole face lighting up. Inside the little box was a pair of matching rings, the same rings that Chris had given him that were from his best friend.

“There’s a secret I’ve been keeping from you.” Jason looked at Danny, unable to say anything, just listening.

“I bought those rings for us back in college, I was going to profess my love to you. I got them at a jewelry store, saved up three months’ worth of salary for it. I was psyching myself up to say something, when I overheard Doug and the guys talking about how you were interested in some chick in your class. Something about setting you up on a date.

“I was embarrassed, so I decided to return the rings. I kept the box because I had already told you I was getting you something since your birthday is in April. When I realized I had dropped the receipt, Doug had already picked it up. I’m not sure how he put two and two together, but I didn’t stick around to find out. I took it to a pawn shop instead and got most of my money back.

“When I saw those rings in your hands that day you proposed to me, I felt like it was the past mocking me. It wasn’t until Chris told me what had happened, that I went back to that pawn shop and asked the owner about it.

“He said he remembered it so vividly because it seemed like there was a deep story behind it. Shortly after I walked out, another man came in asking what I had pawned. When he told him, he offered to buy it but wasn’t able to because of how expensive it was. So he put it on a plan and finally paid it off around the same time Chris said he picked it up.

“That asshole knew I had feelings for you and paid to get those rings back. I couldn’t believe I found the box still in your stuff, so I pulled it out and put the rings back in where they belonged. In short, I couldn’t answer you proposal before because I never got to do mine first.”

Jason was speechless, torn between being surprised by all this and incredibly frustrated by the fact that he hadn’t given him any answer for a reason as selfish as that. He could at least have told him to wait.

His silence seemed to make Danny nervous and he looked away, not sure how to proceed. Jason loved this side of him, how he was always so confident until actually putting everything into motion and becoming a shy little puppy. But, he was his shy little puppy.

Jason grabbed the rings, putting one on his finger and grabbing the other. He crawled over Danny, pushing him down onto the couch. Grabbing his hand, he slid the ring onto his finger. He smiled, glad he could finally claim ownership.

“Yes.” He snuggled into him, staying like that for some time before Danny fidgeted underneath him. He could feel a slight hard on start to pop up and he smirked with satisfaction. It was a good feeling, knowing you could do those things to your lover without trying.

His puppy needed attention, it seemed. Guess he was going to have to make sure he did well and rewarded him for his efforts.

***