The little boy stood up, eyes fixed on the ground. He knew from the footsteps echoing in the hall that she was approaching.
"Tam parva", she said, her voice icy like the worst snow storm in the depths of winter. The child shuddered as he could sense her circling him.
Not so long ago, the hunter took the child into the forest. For what felt like hours, he had crouched unmovingly in the same uncomfortable position behind a shrub, his feet, and hands tingling from the shortage of blood circulation. He had been hungry and impatient as he watched those rabbits in the clearing.
"Why can't we just release the dogs?", he remembered himself asking. The hunter's grip on his neck was painful and merciless.
"Because we are not hunting hares, brat", the man explained, forcing the boy to look at the Woodland edge with his hold.
There, in the thick bushes, two yellow eyes flashed.
"A fox", the child whispered in awe. The hunter's hand wrapped roughly around his mouth, silencing his excited whispers. The man didn't scold him, but his angry look was enough for the boy to know that his behaviour would have an aftermath. He was not particularly afraid of the old hunter, knowing that he could never really do him any harm, but the thought of going to bed that evening without food irked him.
"Look closely", the man admonished.
The fox could only occasionally be seen as an orange stripe between the blackberry bushes, while it crept silently towards its prey. Strangely enough, the predator did not pounce on the rabbits, but rather crept in wide circles around them. Surprised, the boy leaned forward on his tiptoes so as not to lose sight of the animal. Only when the fox attacked in a sudden jump and startled the rabbits did it dawn on the boy that the clever predator had cut off their way back into the forest.
Yes, the animal was clever, but the hunter even more so, because he had only waited for this moment, the boy realized. The fox had unknowingly gone exactly where the hunter had been waiting for him with his crossbow.
"That will make a fine fur collar", the hunter stated and lowered his weapon, the fox's whimpering quieting as it lay motionless on the meadow.
And just like the fox had been circling the unsuspecting rabbits, the tall woman now circled him. Sometimes she came so close that he could feel her cold breath on the back of his neck and he couldn't help but shiver like a cornered prey.
"Tam infirma", she whispered behind him. There they were again, footsteps on the marble floor, and every single one had him wincing. He held his breath as they stopped.
"Respice ad me." Her voice was barely a whisper yet fear forced his body to freeze.
"I said look at me!" All serenity in her voice yielded to a terrifying hiss.
Trembling, he raised his head and looked into the most frightening eyes he had ever seen. They were stunningly beautiful, yet the irises were a cruelly icy colour like white, relentless frost.
"Tu es perditio potentiale. Tanta dignitas, tam parvus, stultus puer. Intelligis, puer? Such a big dignity for such a small, stupid child."
The boy looked at her with childish fascination. She was by far the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. White waves framed her pale, radiant face. Maybe, he thought, if the moon were human it would look like her. Yet, she was so cold.
The boy was stealing careful, longing glances at the glistening crown of white silver on the white waterfall that was her hair. He couldn't help but wonder how many months of bread and firewood the filigree tiara was worth. Two, perhaps three? Although he had a vague idea that jewellery was expensive, he couldn't imagine someone willing to buy silver when they could have warm meals instead. Liane, the woman who looked after him, would always scold him when he complained.
The last winter was hard. Wells were frozen, harvests spoiled by rains in the fall. Hundreds and thousands slowly starving to death. Winter showed them a final dignity when it covered those who fell asleep trembling and would never wake up again with a heavy blanket of white snow. Yet he was alive. Narrow, but sated and healthy.
At home, there was a fireplace and furs that kept him warm at night.
"You will do. You must. Tnum munus implebis. Vultis parere?", the strange woman questioned slowly, observing his frail, shivering form. Did she know what cold felt like? And hunger?
"Volo, Excellentia tua", he answered weakly. Her lips curled slightly into what could have been a mocking grin if her icy eyes wouldn't have looked so lifeless.
"Memento, vivere est militare, fili mi."
[translations]
(my latin is rusty so there might be mistakes)
surge, fili mi - arise, son
tam parva - so small
tam infirma - so weak
respice ad me - look at me
Tu es perditio potentiale. Tanta dignitas, tam parvus, stultus puer. Intelligis, puer? - You are a waste of potential. Such a dignity for such a small, stupid child. Do you understand, child?
Tnum munus implebis. Vultis parere? - You will fulfill your role. Will you comply?
Volo, Excellentia tua - I will, your Excellency
Memento, vivere est militare, fili mi - remember, to live is to be a soldier, my son
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