The girl settled in the seat of the bleachers and started watching the game. Her hands were carrying a can of soda and as soon as she put the straw between her lips, her expression was heavy. He sighed and looked around, the sunlight almost preventing him from seeing the distant figures clearly. Many boys were screaming nearby, excited about the game, perhaps the only ones. A few girls around her whispered about the boys who threw glances at them, or when they scored a goal.

-Oh, what a bag. -Whispered the girl, looked inside her red backpack for the phone and the cell phone, pulled them out. Leaving the can on the floor, he began to untangle the phone cords. -I rolled it up properly, why did it stay like that? -She complained to herself and was finally able to put the object in her ear.

He turned on electronic music, left it on full blast and looked for a book on his list of PDFs on his cell phone to read. A novel sparkled in her eyes, and even though she had already read that ebook several times , she still liked to relive that experience. She has already experienced the feeling of being in love, but she has never lived a romance, because the idea of getting close to someone in such a way scared her.

With the books, she was able to travel a bit into what it would feel like to have someone romantically. She thought about what it would be like to have someone kiss her, their lips making her hot and soft, their hands pulling her close and making her delirious. She would be so dizzy that the world around her would disappear, she would kiss until her breath was gone and her hands were lost in her lover's hair.

It felt magical, and she wanted to feel it for once in her life.

She looked up and made sure no one was watching her, they weren't. He took a deep breath and tried to really concentrate on the book. She laughed bitterly at the thought of the unreality of those narratives, they were worlds so distant, orbits that didn't fit around Joy . She felt like some kind of monster a lot of times, the kind that scared people and nobody showed any kind of interest in her. Which added to the impossibility of having a romance with someone real, not a character.

Once again the girls beside her screamed, this time she got scared, jumping on the bench. He took a deep breath and decided it was time to change places, he left the court and went looking for an empty room. She was so focused on her path that she didn't notice a boy looking at her from the middle of the field.

***

With a deep sigh she approached the door, then walked away once more. She rubbed her own bare arms, growing irritated with herself. It was a new situation and she was thinking of different reasons both to face the situation and also to analyze the option of just leaving and returning home. The pros in favor of going home were increasing, but her frustration at not doing something she'd found easy to do less than twenty minutes ago was greater.

When he was once again going to approach the doorbell of his neighbors' house, a hand passed by his side, reaching for the doorknob. Without touching the girl, the person opened the door. Even so, Joy pulled away with fright and looked at the subject, and found extremely clear eyes staring at her.

-Are you going in? - He asked in a serious tone. -I didn't know you were friends with Marie. -He was close enough for Joy to feel his strong perfume.

-It is not me. -She breathed out the words stunned and walked away from the door, as well as him.

The taller one raised an eyebrow and opened the door a little more, giving a glimpse inside the place. Both receiving the heat of bodies that seethed maddened by the music and drinks. Joy looked at the scene for a moment, it was like she was in her bed, her cell phone at her fingertips as she watched a movie teen , observing that same life that his colleagues lived there a few steps away. Fun, sweat and euphoria, as well as drinks, and an eccentric set of scents. It could be anything, drugs, drinking, sex.

She felt the adrenaline pump through her a moment later, her heart hammering in her chest.

-And then... Are you going to come in? - He asked again, his eyes looking her up and down, making her restless on her feet.

She wondered if she didn't look fit for a party. Maybe a pajama suit wasn't really appropriate unless it was a sleepover per se. He was dressed in tight pants, a long shirt and sneakers on his feet. Joy also noted her shiny hair, perhaps from freshly showered on a warm autumn night. In the northeast every hour was a hot hour. She imagined how it must be boiling inside that place.

She also thought that he might be finding her strange, completely out of place. And he would be right, but she didn't want to face that on herself, not right now. Joy knew she would think about it again, and would blame herself for it all. From the moment he stepped out of his bed, he walked out of his house and stopped in front of that door. Everything had been a mistake. Or she would see it that way in a few minutes.

-Sorry, I'm on my way. -Said the girl and walked along the sidewalk.

- Hey ! She stopped with the sound behind her. -Didn't you come to the party? -He said, messing with his cell phone, he seemed to be talking to someone.

-I wanted... -She had certain plans, but now they've changed. The pros for going home had won out and she wanted to curl up on her bed and read something until she fell asleep.

-You study at Mundial Vilas, right? -The question took her by surprise, it took a second to think if it would be safe to say that, but he seemed to be as young as she was, so she confirmed.

-Yes. - Joy looked at exact points of the boy's face as he approached closer, the light from the streetlight giving them an ascent. Her earring, her hair, her pale eyes and her rosy, freckled cheeks. And when facing him, she felt strangely heated, it could only be shameful. Shame for analyzing him, and being analyzed back.

-Marie has mentioned you at one time or another. - He gestured with his hand;

-Marie? -His voice came out low, his eyes confused.

-From Mundial Vilas, she is in the second year. She's the one having the party.

-I know her, we were ... -She stopped and the boy was waiting. -Oh, I thought a boy lived here. -By the expression on her face, the boy realized that she was theorizing on the subject much faster than her breath could hold.

-He's her friend. -He responded.

But then a moment flashed back into their conversation, she found herself now unsure if she'd talked to Marie long enough for her to mention her to someone else. She shifted her weight on her feet, and considered how to start, seeing that the other was waiting for her with a raised eyebrow. It started anyway:

-Ah, I don't know if... It would be good if I stayed. There was just a lot of noise and it's almost 2 in the morning...

The pulsing music interrupted her and caught her attention, it was indeed very loud, but no one but her in the neighborhood seemed willing to call the police. It was the weekend after all, the neighbors didn't care. She would leave, but when she was kindly saying goodbye, the boy walked away from her. He walked three steps and looked back, his look thin, false impatience. Joy thought he was going to say goodbye too.

-Come on, the crazy girl likes tourists. -He spoke and pierced himself between the bodies, leaving her behind.

She took in the situation, stepping into her thin sandals, her shorts being covered by her long shirt, and her disheveled hair falling over her shoulders. He could only ask the kind boy to ask the hostess of the party to turn down the sound, but he thought that was too late. The next day, to be precise. Her thoughts weren't fast this time and she hated to miss that opportunity.

So not wanting to think too hard again, she walked into the room. She watched everything with meticulous caution, but her body was energized with anticipation, pulsing, just like the music. She breathed in that unusual air and tried to imagine herself as one of her favorite protagonists. The bravest and most carefree would be perfect at that moment, so he hugged her from the inside.