Chapter Ten: A Little Bit Gay, A Little Bit Not Okay

Neo

Nate and I spent a week secluded in our apartment away from prying eyes. Malcolm had even stayed away; not barging in at inopportune times; it was Sunday though, and Sunday was family dinner night at the O’Rourke’s so I had to drag Nate out of his cocoon of blankets on the couch and into the shower so we could get ready. Nate grumbled the whole time, but I knew he missed his parents, his mom in particular. I knew as much as he didn’t want to go, he’d go because he’d hate to disappoint his mother. Hell, I’d hate to disappoint Csilla too.

Nate was dressed in a pale pink button up, and dark wash jeans. He had tousled his hair purposefully with gel, and he looked hot. To be honest, I now wanted to stay home and ravish him…but Nate needed a slice of normalcy, if only for a night and me jumping him because he looked hot in jeans and a nice shirt wouldn’t be helpful. I wasn’t as put together as Nate, having opted for a dark colored Henley and basic jeans…but it was comfortable and I knew for a fact that Nate liked how soft this shirt was to cuddle against.

“Ready?”

“Can’t keep mom waiting, she’ll come hunt us down.”

I laughed at that, but I knew it was true. The doorbell rang and we shared a puzzled look before going to answer it, there we were greeted by Csilla, Calvin, Vanessa, Vincent, Malcolm, and Maria. Csilla was holding a casserole dish, and from the smell I could tell it was lasagna. I moved Nate to the side to let in our very large, extended family; and before I could close the door, there was Lucilla and Lilah. Was our apartment even big enough for this many people? 

“Mamma, che ci fai qui? Stavamo venendo da te!”

“Non avrei permesso a tutto il branco di guardare il mio bambino in via di guarigione! Ti ho portato la famiglia e la cena!”

“Mama, thank you…it was very thoughtful. I’ll show you the kitchen.”

My Italian was abysmal at best so I was lost to what was said, but Nate seemed very touched. I turned to Vanessa and she was looking at me expectantly,

“Ness, when did you get in?”

“A few hours ago. I wanted to come sooner, but I had to stay to witness the pyre.”

“Thank you for doing that.”

“Thank you for killing that bastard.” Ness said with venom in her voice, “I only wished I could’ve done it.”

“Bambina, you don’t mean that. Neo didn’t take any joy in taking a life, no matter how monstrous.” Calvin chastised his daughter,

“Either way, you’re welcome.” 

“When is Bree’s service?” Calvin asked,

“In a few days. The Hammonds have been distraught so Vilde has been doing the arrangements. Bree is having a Luna’s Rite.”

“How nice, and how is Atlas?”

“He started training right after the pyre. He’s been quiet about the whole thing and he’s worried that Nate won’t want to talk to him again.”

“Are you going to introduce us?” Lilah asked,

“Ness, Vin, these are my sisters. Lilah and Lucilla.”

“Oh! Your hair is so pretty!” Ness exclaimed at the twins, Lilah and Lucilla both had pin straight black hair, and they refused to tell me their secret to make it so smooth and glossy.

“Your hair is gorgeous too!” Ness’ hair was bright Irish red, curly and wild but not frizzy. “Reminds me of Merida!”

“Thank you! 

“Kids! Calvin! Dinner is ready!” I heard Csilla call from the kitchen, 

We gathered at our yet to be used dining table, amazingly it fit all of us; the food was delicious of course, and we all had jokes and conversations going. I did however notice that Nate would shy away from physical touch with everyone besides me and Csilla. It was the only side effect that I had noticed since he’d been back, but this was also the first time he’d been around everyone in a week. It broke my heart to watch my affectionate mate shy away from hugs and touches of the hand. He loved to give hugs and casually touch friends and family before Beckham did what he did. It was quiet until Lucilla put down her fork and cleared her throat,

“Everyone, I have an announcement!”

“Oh? So dramatic!” Csilla encouraged,

“I am gay!”

“Really? I had no idea.” I deadpanned.

“Also, mom kicked me out. Can I stay with you?”

Before I could answer, Csilla stepped in,

“No baby child, you can come live with me and Calvin.”

“Wait! I don’t want to be stuck with mom all by myself! Adopt me too!” Lilah cried out.

“Okay.”

What…just happened? Had my mother-in-law just adopted my teenage twin sisters? Csilla turns to Nate, puts her hand on his shoulder and said gravely,

“I need you to clean out the rest of your stuff.”

“But I’m your baby!”

“And you have a luxury apartment that you share with your mate.”

“So?! I’m your baby!”

“Babe…relax. You can be my baby.”

“It’s not the same!”

“We’ll let him have his tantrum, mom, when do you want us to get the stuff?”

“I think that’s the first time you called me mom…” 

Calvin across the table almost pouting says, “And he still calls me Mr. O’Rourke…”

“Okay dad.” I said sarcastically, “You say that Nate gets his flair for the dramatics from Csilla, but I can now see that he also gets it from you.”

Nate turns to look at me and slowly tilts his head to the side and says, “Excuse me?”

“You heard me.” I shot back, smirking at his shocked expression.

“If you guys are done with the foreplay, Vin and I have an announcement.” 

We all turn to look at Ness and then she continues,

“Dad, I think you’re going to like this one.”

Calvin pauses, mid fork lift to his mouth and smirks at his daughter,

“Let me guess, you’re pregnant.”

“How…”

“What else were you going to announce?”

“I’m going to be a grandma! Oh my goodness! Vanessa when did you find out?”

“A few weeks ago. I wanted to wait until it was safe.”

“Congratulations Ness! I’m so excited to be the fun gay uncle!”

After all the announcements, dinner was uneventful and funnily enough, Malcolm was the quietest of the bunch. He was probably exhausted from performing my role as Alpha as well as doing his own job as Beta…and he was still in school since he didn’t graduate early like Nate and I. He and Maria deserved some time off, maybe that’ll be their graduation gift from me and Nate.

The night came to an end, Csilla hugged Nate tightly…but to my dismay he shied away from anyone else touching him, even his dad. When it was only Malcolm and Maria left, since they lived on this floor, Malcolm finally spoke,

“Alpha Jefferson called while you two were…recharging? Healing? Anyway they held Beckham’s pyre and um Vilde is putting a memorial marker in the pack cemetery. He wanted me to warn you, Nate so you weren’t taken off guard if you went to visit Sam’s.”

“Thanks for telling us Colm.”

“Thanks for covering for us too, you too Maria. We’ll be back to work tomorrow.”

“No worries, it is my job.”

“Nate, don’t ever let these two knuckleheads tell you your job is easy. I am so glad I am not the permanent Luna.” Maria whispered gravely,

“I’ll try to keep them in line for the both of us.” Nate said laughing, it was good to hear that sound.

“Okay Mal, time to go home.”

Maria took Malcolm by the hand and dragged him down the hall to their apartment. I closed the door; feeling an overwhelming surge of gratitude and love towards my found family. They had helped, unwittingly to put Nate back together again. He looked more like himself.

Lucilla

Unlike my older brother, I hadn’t always known I was gay. I honestly thought I was straight until I got a new lab partner and suddenly they were all I could think about. Arlo was non-binary, but presented female most of the time…and it took me a long time to figure out that I was actually pansexual. I had Lilah to thank, she spent hours helping me research what I could be, giving me countless quizzes to find some answers…and while having a label helped me--it wasn’t a magical fix all be all. 

For starters, being Pan, was the same as being gay so to my mom I was still an abomination even if I still had the option of having a mate that could impregnate me and continue our sorry excuse of a family line. I was actually hoping that I would have a mate that couldn’t procreate. During our research, Lilah found out she was Aroace, I didn’t know how that would come into play when we turned eighteen, but she figured no one needed to know unless it was pertinent, it didn’t change much anyway.

“Hey, are you okay?” Lilah bumped me with her elbow,

“No, but I will be.” 

We entered our old apartment as quietly as possible, Calvin right behind us. When we told Nate’s parents we needed to get a few things, Calvin volunteered to be our muscle in case mom decided to get physical. I rounded up some stuffed animals, some clothes, my laptop, multiple chargers, my bookbag and some books. The only pictures I took were of me and Lilah, us with Neo,  and some with our friends. Lilah seemed determined to have Calvin carry our TV, and our favorite blankets. I slipped from the room, and entered Neo’s old one. We had hid in here so many times growing up…but Neo had put that monster to rest too. He saved us, even if mom couldn’t see it. I picked up the box he had been collecting a few weeks ago; he probably didn’t want any of this…but maybe one day he would.

“What the hell are you doing here?”

“Mother. I’m just gathering a few things. I’ll be out of your hair in a second.”

“Just get out of here. I can’t have you corrupting the child growing inside me.”

“What?! You’re pregnant?”

“Yes. Joseph left me a gift before he was taken from us.”

“He was a monster…he deserved what he got.”

“He was my MATE! Your father! You will show him some respect!”

“He doesn’t deserve it. He was a miserable closeted bigot who refused to grow and accept that times were changing. I can’t understand how you can be so blind to the truth. Neo did what he had to to protect his mate, who by the way is the kindest, sweetest, smartest, most down to Earth person you’ll ever meet if you just gave him a chance. He just went through literal Hell, and he still only cares about this Pack and Neo. What is so wrong with being gay? Does it hurt you? Scare you? What is it? If you have a good reason for hating us, by all means share it with me.”

My mother remained silent, figures. I pushed past her and found Lilah and Calvin waiting at the door, Lilah had a concerned look in her eyes but I shook my head and opened the door,

“I feel sorry for you. I’m gaining so much, but you’re stuck here; alone. I pity that baby too…having to have a bigot as a guide in this messed up world.”

***

Csilla was waiting for us anxiously pacing the living room, when she saw us she rushed to our sides and checked us over for injuries. I chuckled and let her do what she wanted, it was nice to be fretted over. Our parents never did when we were growing up, too busy leading the Pack with terror tactics to give their three kids love and attention.

“She didn’t hurt us, honest Mrs. O’Rourke.”

“Oh stop with the Mrs. O’Rourke. Call me Csilla.”

“Csilla, thank you for offering to take us in.”

“In my Pack growing up, before I came to Purple Moon, there was a boy about your age. He came out to his parents and they kicked him out; and no one would take him in. Eventually he became a target for awful people and he would be beaten and abused until he was almost unrecognizable. I was too young, maybe ten years old to do anything; and finally the boy had had enough. He killed himself. I found him on my way to school, just laying on a park bench. I thought he was sleeping…but he had slit his wrists and forearms with a silver knife.”

“That’s awful…”

“I vowed that day that I wouldn’t let anything like that happen again. If I had the power to help, I was going to help.”

“How did you know the boy?”

“He was my older brother. I loved him more than anything and I didn’t understand what was so wrong with loving another man. I was so angry with my parents and the entire pack after he died. When I met Calvin, I made sure he understood what I wanted to do…and if our children one day said they were gay; we would accept them no matter what.”

“Nate…is so lucky to have you guys as parents!” Lilah wailed and threw her arms around Csilla and Calvin, 

“You can consider us your parents too…if you want.” Calvin offered.

“I’d like that.” I told him.

“Alright enough of this, let me show you to your room.”

I was hoping that this would be a good start to my new life. Maybe now I could pursue Arlo; maybe in two years I’d find out they were my mate. But I knew that even though I had wiped my hands of my biological parents I would care about my unborn sibling…could my mother even carry to term at her age? No, it didn’t matter anymore. If she didn’t want anything to do with me, then I didn’t want anything to do with her.

***

Lilah and I settled in quickly, it was almost like we had always been a part of the O’Rourke clan. Lilah and I were heading into school when I spotted Arlo. Goddess, they were beautiful. Lilah noticed where my attention was, and smirked knowingly,

“Go talk to them.”

“What do I even say?”

“Dude, just say ‘I think you’re cute, wanna go out?’ it’s really not that hard.”

“Okay…I can do this. What if they say no?”

“Take that shit like a woman and move on.” Lilah said with a shrug.

I made my way over to where Arlo was talking to another student, they were fiddling with a strand of their dyed red hair; their wide rimmed glasses were sliding down their nose but they didn’t seem to care, the other student, that I didn’t know the name of saw me first and nodded their head in my direction, Arlo turned and smiled when they saw me.

“Luce! How is your brother?”

“He’s okay, he and Nate both returned to work today.”

“That’s so good to hear! So, what’s up? Do you need my notes?”

“Uh no, I actually think you’re really cute and was wondering if you wanted to go out some time?”

Arlo looked shocked at first, but then they schooled their features,

“You know I’m non-binary right?”

“And I’m Pan, doesn’t bother me any. Does it bother you?”

“Oh! Then as long as you’re cool with not calling me a girlfriend or boyfriend, then sure I’d love to go out with you.”

“Great! Uh, I’ll text you the details and I’ll see you in class!”

I returned feeling giddy to Lilah’s side and she gave me an excited hug,

“I’m so happy for you!”

“Thank’s Lil, I couldn’t have done this without you.”