Third Person

~

The trip back was quiet, and reasonably so with all that had happened that night. They were walking through the rooftops, jumping occasionally or just pausing to get their breaths.

Kira wasn't sure how to feel about it; on one hand, the silence was unnerving, making it hard for her thoughts to stay at bay; on the other hand, she just didn't feel like talking.

Not after what she'd witnessed.

It was all she could do to not break down, she could just clench her fists uselessly at her sides to keep her emotions at bay.

"You guys aren't asking anything." Troy stated, he was ahead of she and Kuro who had gotten in sync at some point.

"Huh?" Kuro blinked, seemingly just coming out of his own thoughts.

"You're not mad I didn't speak out for us? I was willing to keep something at the cost of our lives and you're both not curious?"

Oh, Kira thought, exchanging a look with Kuro, she shrugged.

Kuro sighed, "I won't lie, it was a bit annoying but I guess I can wait a bit longer for you to confess-"

Kira kicked him hard enough to send him flying a short distance away, this really wasn't the time for his jokes even if he was trying to lift the mood. She turned to Troy, "I think what Kuro is trying to say is that we understand."

"Yeah," Kuro hopped to his feet, "You wouldn't put our lives on the line if it wasn't worth it. You really believed we could beat Yamagata-san and I guess that's all that mattered at the moment."

"We're not letting you off the hook though," Kira nudged him in the side, "You were looking at both of us pretty weird Troy, are you sure there's nothing to confess." She teased moving into his personal space.

Kuro joined her immediately, "Yeah Troy, give us a little hint pretty please."

His irritation levels were nearing bursting point already, he took in a deep breath and shot of them the most bone chilling glare, "You're both morons. I don't take interest in morons." He said stiffly.

They both sank to the ground with sad watery eyes. Troy rolled his gold ones, " Get a grip you two, Kira, what was Yamagata-san able to tell you before he passed?"

Kira felt an icy chill roll down her spine, nothing could ease the dread the memory brought with it. She swallowed thickly, eyes locking on Kuro who seemed concerned, "He said I should tell you the word 'Gashadokuro', that you'd understand."

Kuro's eyes narrowed in thoughtfulness, "I might have to visit the library."

"It has something to do with skeletons, right?" Troy questioned.

Kuro nodded, "We'll talk more at noon, What we all need right now is some rest. If we plan on getting through this, we need to be at full strength."

Kira nodded, quickly regaining her composure, now wasn't the time to mourn, there might never even be a time to mourn, not until Nightmare was stopped and then, the breath of relief they all so dearly craved would be well deserved.

Even when she gave up her powers, she wanted to help in any way she could, cheering them on and giving the best support she could.

She turned to head home catching Lucifer's fading voice in the wind.

'You really can't have your cake and eat it Kira.'

***

The scene didn't stop playing in her head for the rest of the day. Kira was getting so tired of seeing Yamagata's dying moment on replay at the forefront of her mind.

The last conversation they had was a tune that was slowly etching it's lyrics into her soul, weighing her down because she knew she could have saved him. If only she wasn't so weak. If only they were all a little bit more powerful.

She closed the door with a heavy sigh, if anyone had asked, she'd say she was okay, she'd just come back from a fun outing with her friends and was going to do home work before eating dinner and heading to bed.

The simplicity of the thought was ironic. She'd put on her best smile and had done her best to keep everything together, but even then, Haru had still nervously pulled her aside to ask of she was fine.

It was easy to lie, especially when it was for his own good and everyone's safety. She wasn't going to be the reason anyone worried ever again.

After getting changed for the night, she sat her desk twiddling the beads of Hikari's bracelet which she had begun to wear as a reminder of the duty she had to carry out.

To her misfortune, not even homework could take her mind off Yamagata.

'He wanted nothing to do with this just like me, but escape is hard when even fate is against you.' She thought to no one in particular.

There was a knock on her door, breaking her out of her thoughts, she turned in her seat, "Come in."

Ares poked his head in, his usual smile lightning up the room as he came in, "Dinner will be ready soon, I have Kat warming up the leftovers from what Troy made last night."

Troy cooking for them was something they'd gotten used to in a short amount of time. Evenings when they'd all make their way from school an discuss homework, movies and other things at the counter while Troy got to work, occasionally hitting either she or Kuro with the spoon when they tried to touch something.

"Okay, I'll be down to make sure she doesn't burn it in a minute." She said.

Ares nodded, "Kira, I'm still a bit worried you know, maybe the volleyball should take a backseat for the rest of the year. I'm happy you're getting better and that people respect you but if the pressure is too much..."

She sighed, the look in his eyes breaking her heart more than she was ready for. He was still worried, but it was about the wrong thing and she had no idea how quell his fears.

'I'm throwing you a bone here...' Yamagata's words echoed in her head.

Throwing a bone...she had to give him something, something that be easy for him to believe.

"My brother's name was Tadashi." She said suddenly.

Ares eyes zeroed in on her instantly, mind not knowing what to make of that information. Kira had never told him about her late family before. He'd always wanted to know more, to have and idea of things were for her before they met. Before the accident that she claimed changed her life.

She walked over to the bed, patting the space beside her, he took a seat and folded his hands in his lap.

"He followed me everywhere mostly because he was afraid of getting bullied. He was pretty smart you know, teacher's wanted us to sign him up for a special school but he didn't want to go. My mum gave self defense lessons at a small school, she went through some stuff as a kid and started teaching me protect myself as soon as I could walk but she made it fun."

"She sounds like really amazing woman."

Kira nodded, struggling to keep the shaking in place, she wished Ahlai hadn't messed with her head, she hated that the last memory of her late family was a bunch of walking burnt corpses.

"Kira...you don't have to..."

"It's okay...my dad, he was the best, he had these big muscles because he was into construction work for a growing company. He carry me and Tadashi all over the place when he got home and he'd read us to sleep. Our house was a small but it was okay for all of us." She sniffed lightly, "I hate remembering cause it makes me miss them so much. That's why I was so happy when we met and you offered to take me somewhere far from home, far from here.

"I wanted to forget everything and start my life all over again because it's my fault. If I hadn't run away, mum and dad wouldn't have spent so long looking for me. Mum would have been home to turn the stove off, instead of running in to save Tadashi and dad running in to get her."

Kira had heard the news all over their small town, she hadn't been there until the very end, when the police and emergency forces had arrived.

"Oh Kira," Ares embraced her in a tight hug, "It's alright, it's hard but you have to let go, sometimes, bad things happen but we have to move past them." He took one of her hands in his.

"Shoving down the feelings won't help, you just have to let it all out, and accept that it's happened look towards the future Kira, I'll make sure nothing bad ever happens to you ever again. So when the bad thoughts come back, just call and I'll be here to cheer you up."

Kira wiped the tears that had begun to form, she wanted to tell him that she wasn't the one that need protecting but maybe she did every now and then. That didn't change the fact that she wanted to be good enough to be the one people depended on, just like the days that were lost to the fire.

"Ares, thank you so much." She whispered hugging him back.

She ran his had through her hair in a soothing manner, "No thanks need, sweetie."

Kat stood outside the slightly open door, eyes burning and heart stinging. She scoffed silently and quietly left to her own room.