Leo:

“Jennifer?” Ryan said to my mom, in the newly painted kitchen. The attempt of my mom and Ryan to make the house “cheerful” in the past few months had gone overboard, in my opinion. 

I felt like I needed sunglasses. It gave me a headache. Now the kitchen was a bright, sunny yellow color. 

Ryan was in earshot of me, clearly. 

It was exactly five pm, after he got home from is “job,” on a depressing Monday. I still was not really sure what he “did” at the job, that it seemed he seldom went to.

“Jennifer, if the principal calls you again about Leo blatantly skipping class again in this, his junior year, I think you should ask him what in god’s name does he think he is doing?” he said.

“Or maybe I should ask him myself, as his father.”

I walked slowly toward Ryan so he would stop playing his games, and just know that I knew he knew that I had heard him.

He looked at me with his eyes twice the size they really were. His baseball hat was on backwards. Cringe.

“Yes?” I said.

“Leo, as your father, I will not allow you to skip class anymore down at that high school. And I know that you don’t even have permission to leave the campus during lunch, because your mother told me she never even signed the damn form. But knowing you, you probably do anyway.”

I looked at him tamely. 

He knew he had no control over me. And he knew I knew this. 

And yes, I did leave the “campus” everyday for lunch. Why wouldn’t I?

“I am passing all necessary classes,” I said.

“Well I really don’t know what necessary means to you Leo, but you need to be there for all of the classes nevertheless,” Ryan said pleadingly, looking at my mom.

It made my skin crawl. I felt sick. Could he just stop pretending now?

“And your mother can’t be called at the drop of a hat, every single week, when you are truant.”

Oh, so mom was talking to him about me again, as if this would make a difference anyway.

If only Ryan knew how truant I really was. 

They only catch me a few times a week, but I was skipping class more than that. 

“So Ryan?” I said. “Who is paying the bills in the house? The electric bill, for example, who pays that? And your cell phone bill? What would you do without that nice device? And who pays for it?”

“My mother pays those bills. And your truancy, from your job, does not pay anything really, does it?” I said.

“Including all that ice cream you like. The new shirts you ordered on Amazon last week. And the new barbecue that you clearly know how to use.”

Ryan tried to ignore me, and to remain calm for about a total of a half a second. 

And then, “You will never amount to anything, Leo, with this bad attitude you have,” he said. His anger was rising visibly. 

“Don’t you realize that, Leo? And don’t you see that I am trying to help you, Leo?” 

“So you can actually graduate from high school. And maybe do something worthwhile.”

Ryan’s voice had become louder. And mom was now closing the small window in the kitchen. 

What Ryan did not realize, in his ignorance, was that his idea of worthwhile was never something I would aspire to anyway. 

What did it mean, actually, even to him?

And this is where I got my idea of the cars.