It's not that I got the character just because I sold 10 millions of those diapers in a matter of weeks, it was because I am able to convince the directors on the day of the audition a few weeks ago. 

Well, I just need to show them good performance for them to shut up, right?

"Are you ready Wren?" asked Director Howard. We had been talking prior the day of the shooting and also during the audition as well. He was a bit adamant in casting me in the role of Robbie but due to Casting Director confidence recommendation, he invited me to audition the role. 

There were a few casting choices that they have in mind but due to their slightly older age and physical body a bit bigger than intended, they open the audition for new actors to play. Maybe they were asking for too much of a criteria for the role, none meet the image that they wanted until the Casting Director forwarded my name. 

Director Howard said that if I too fail to meet the image of Robbie that he wanted, he planned to change the character settings though the thought of duking it out with Ammie, the Screen Writer of <My Happy Life> and the possibilities of having to push out the initial date for shooting scared the living out his poor soul. 

"Hum!" I replied with a broad smile, feeling excited for my first acting role.

Director Howard laugh a little. Should he feel relieved that he met the very actor that he imagined it or was it all just the luck of that day?

Ammie eyes were twinkling and her face brimmed with happy smile since she met me on the day of the audition. 

"Have you met Gary? He's going to play the male lead of this drama."

I nodded. Though it was very brief meeting with an excuse that he need to prepare to get into character. I don't dwell on his reluctance. If I were him, I would be worried too. 

"Then, Jerome will explain to you where you're going to stand and the movement as well. You memorized your line?"

"Hum! My mommy help me," I replied with my eyes wondering about the street that will be the center stage for today shooting.

Assistant Director Jerome who was standing beside Director Howard beckoned me to follow him and he explained everything that I need to know while my mother waits for me behind the busy staff running around checking the preparation is in order. 

Then, I saw Gary. He was talking to Director Howard before dragging his feet to Assistant Director Jerome, looking completely different than when I saw him before. 

Method acting?

A phrase pop into my mind. I remember the character the Gary has to play is a novel writer who cooped up inside his home and rarely comes out. The person I saw in front of my eyes depicts the movement of a sluggish person but Gary's eyes still has it's own twinkle. Maybe it is not method acting instead it was his own way to immersed in his own character interpretation. Well, it may be my first day of shooting, but it is the shooting for the third episode. 

My eyes met with Gary's eyes and I can't hide my admiration of his effort he put in his work. 

"He's cute isn't it?"

"I'm trying my hardest to resist those eyes. I don't want to build up hope." 

Hearing that Assistant Director Jerome smirked. "Don't worry. Just do your job as usual. Howard don't take anybody to act in his piece just because the actor is so charming."

"I know, I know! And I'm grateful to know that I'm not just anybody too."

I make myself busy by looking around the set. At Director Howard who is getting ready to seat in front of the monitor screen. At the extras who are rolling the shoulders trying to act tough like a gangster. Then I look at the place that I should stand but all of that, my ears still perked to the whispered words that Gary and Assistant Director Jerome uttered. 

I guess I'm not that immune to poeple's opinion despite reincarnating so many times that I've lost count. At least, I don't feel dispirited at what they said but more excited because I know they are worried and scared to build expectations. 

Let just say I can read people's face better just because I lived life more than once or twice. And hearing Gary's concern, I can't wait to see his surprised face. Just like Director Howard, Assistant Director Jerome and Ammie. Their suprise faces were worth to be frame on in my movie room wall. 

Maybe in this life, I might develop a bit of a teasing habit. Probably the work of DNA gene. 

"Alright, in position. Ready?"

I stand on the mark that Assistant Director Jerome told me. Then I look at my mother's face. She wave her hand and mouthed "good luck!"

I grip the bag straps hanging on my shoulders. I took a deep breath.

"Action!"

* * * * *

Robbie is a 3 years old child who lives with his young mother in this cold and bustling city. He is mature for his age but does not mix well with his peer probably because he can't speak and he can't hear properly. Whenever his mother sent him to daycare, he would play alone in the corner. Even when he was bullied by bigger kids to give up his toys, he easily give in and proceed to do something else instead. He is an outcast and he does not have any sense of attachment to any of the toys he played with. 

That was the teacher assassment of him a few weeks ago. 

But today he quitely leaves the daycare with his backpack, not waiting for his mother to pick him up. Today, he is going to pick up his mother or so he thought.

A particular group of students, cornering a lanky bent should older brother. At the hands of one of the students, was a note of money.

The older brother shakes his head and try his best to avoid looking at the students.

Robbie can barely make out the words that were thrown around. The thought of him able to hear the words indicate that those students were talking really loud or maybe screaming. The older brother was jolting every time a students talked to him.

The longer he looks at the older brother, the bigger the feeling of anger pile up in his heart. He then stands in the middle of the road, facing the corner street. 

Robbie is not a justice lover kind of kid. He does not know what superhero is. His house does not have tv. But looking at that older brother remind him of someone very dear to him. The person he swears to protect.

'Robbie is very kind. Mommy loves it when Robbie is kind.'

His mother word etched in his heart. 

He took a whistle that hangs on his neck. Often times he hides it underneath his shirt so other bigger and older kids won't snatch it from him. Then he blew it. Blew as much as his lungs can gave out. That his face turn red and that he felt like his neck veins might pop and possibly faint out of dizziness. 

He does not stop blowing his whistle when the students came to him because he knows there would be other adults coming too. People will look around and he is the middle of the street with his eyes looking straight at those bullies. 

The students stop at their tracks. Shivers ran down the backs as they saw the fierce eyes of a 3 years old staring straight at them. Then as if they reaalizes something, they whispered among themselves before make a run out of the alley. 

Robbie stops blowing when he felt a soft touch on his shoulder. A familiar sky blue outfit cought on his peripheral. But his gze does not waver from the older brother who stands timidly at the corner. His eyes and that older brother's eyes connected. 

Gary swallow his saliva involuntarily. He felt like he was facing a baby tiger who does not know fear and ready to jump on his prey. 

"Cut!"

Director Howard's voice was heard. But Gary can't seem to let out his breath. The baby tiger is still on his four feet ready to pounce. The five seconds waiting for Director Hwang decision felt like eternity.

"Okay!"

Gary let out a huge relieved to hear that 'okay' word and the baby tiger suddenly disappear like a fatamorgana. It was so intense that his leg gave out. Looking at Gary's reaction, a 3 year old toddler can't hide his teasing smile from blooming.

* * * * *

Should I approach him first? Or should I ignore it?

I've been contemplating whether or not I play dumb of this particular adult hiding behind a door of waiting room. It was a makeshift room in a building not far from the next scene that I have to shoot. Since this is a shooting for drama, the work pace was so fast that I am grateful for my auntie reminder a few nights ago so I don't feel too shock or overwhelm by it.

Still, it feels a bit burdensome to know that someone is lurking and piercing the back of your head.

"What's wrong Wren?" my mother asked.

How should I approach this? Hm...

"Mommy, is it okay if I go see brother Gary?"

"Why?"

"Hm... I have things I want to ask."

My mother thinks for a moment before she smile warmly. "Is it autograph? You've been watching his movies past few days ago."

I nodded enthusiastically. Good job mommy! I am proud you catch my signal. 

Then I heard a running footstep and I almost let out a laugh. My mother look at me quizzically. 

By the time my mother knock on Gary's door and talk to his manager, I saw he was sitting coolly on his chair while reading his script. 

"Hello," I said with a bit force of cuteness. 

"Hi Wren, come in. Gary's been waiting - "

"Ahem." A cough was heard. It did not sound awkward at all. 

"Gary do you need water? Are your throat uncomfortable?" His manager lets me and my mother in and started to search for a lozenges.

"Just water. Hi Wren," he greeted me with an uncontrollable smiles from reaching his ears. "How was your room? Do you want candy or snacks?"

"Thank you," I said while nodding at his offer. I thought it might be a small candies or a small packet of crackers but to actually get a basket of sweets and snacks assorment.

"Do you know Wren, Gary really likes to sing your song and he sings along when it came out on tv."

"Manager!"

"Really? I want to hear it!" It wasn't actually my song but at this point the diapers is also called 'Wren's diaper'. 

Gary's cheeks turned pink. He took a deep breath then he exhale. "Wren, do you mind if we exchange number? I think it would be fun if we can be close. I can't wait to see what kind of an actor Wren grows up to be. I think Wren has a bright future."

Hearing that my heart suddenly skip a beat. To suddenly received a compliment from a great actor like Gary who has been in this industry for a long time despite he still young himself was a huge booster to my confident. More importantly it made me realize. This was what destiny has brought me to.

To be an actor. 

"Then, is it okay if I call you big brother?"

Stunned, slowly Gary's eyes sparkle at my question. "Of course! Call me whenever okay!" He laughed merrily.

I laughed along with Gary. My heart swelled with undescribable feelings. Like every other life, whenever I found my purpose, something felt missing. But this time, that something was reachable. I could felt it. 

The beginning of my journey as actor. What kind of life waiting for me?