Jack 

“Faster Bessie!” I yell as we approach home. I didn’t just bring the doctor, I brought father and Hansel too. I pray that we’ve made it on time but who knows really. Smoke comes from the chimney and the house is silent as if nothing is wrong. I wonder if maybe perhaps nothing is. I dismount and put Bessie in the barn, “This way!” I yell. 

Father and the doctor follow on my heels. Hansel is only five so he follows after on his little legs. He’s wrapped in a blanket because even though his fever’s broken he’s still a little weak and cold. We burst through the door and I yell, “Ella? Ella! Where are you? I brought the doctor and father! Ella?” 

She doesn’t respond. I run into the parlor and they follow. My eyes find Ella sitting in a chair with a small baby in her arms. Her eyes are red and tears fall down her cheeks. She has sacks under her perfectly blue eyes and her hair is disheveled. Her dress is stained and she looks exhausted. She feeds the baby but stares at nothing. 

Father rebuilds the dying fire and I walk up to Ella, “Did we make it on time?” She hesitates and licks her lips before she slowly shakes her head and her tears begin to come faster. I stare at her. My whole world is falling apart. My mother is dead. 

“Where is she?” Asks father. 

“Upstairs,” Ella whispers. 

Father runs up the stairs. 

Hansel stumbles inside and runs up to Ella curiously looking at the bundle wide-eyed. “What’s that?” He says pointing to the baby. 

Ella doesn’t look well so I grab Hansel and pull him back so he sits with me on the floor in front of the fire, “It’s a baby,” I explain. 

Hansel claps his hands and repeats, “Baby!” His face is so happy.

“Yes,” I smile, “Baby girl.” 

“Baby girl?” He asks his eyes widening, “Ella a girl too!” He yells happily pointing. 

“Yes,” I say, “Ella’s a girl too.”

“Yay!” Hansel yells, “Where’s mama Jack?” 

He asks looking around and noticing her absence. 

“She’s not here right now.” I say my voice breaking. 

“Where she go?” He asks, his face twisting curiously. 

“To heaven,” I say as I start crying. 

“Where’s that? Can I go with her Jack?” He asks me. 

“No, not yet.” 

“When?” He asks. 

“Someday.” 

“I wanna go now!” He yells. 

“You can’t,” I say crying. 

“What’s wrong?” Hansel asks, some of his anger disappearing. He grabs his face in my hands and says, “Why tears?” 

I take his hands in mine and say, “Mama’s dead Hansel.” 

He stares at me for a moment and then says simply, “No.” 

He walks over to Ella and asks, “Jack told me mama dead. Jack wrong right?” 

Ella licks her lips and whispers, “Jack’s right.” 

“No.” He says stubbornly, “Where’s my mama! I want to see mama!” 

“Mama’s dead,” I sob. He looks at the two of us suspiciously for a moment and then turns and begins to stomp up the stairs. I follow and try to catch him before he gets to mother’s room but he’s too fast and I’m too tired. We burst into mother’s room and my eyes fall on her face. 

It’s paper white but serene and calm, carefree. 

He runs between father and the doctor and up to mother’s arm which hangs down. He pulls on it and says, “Mama! I’m home! The doctor said I was all better now!” Mother doesn’t answer. He looks up at father and asks, “Mama dead?” 

Father begins to cry and nods. Hansel says, “No! No! No!” He starts screaming and father picks him up and carries him out of the room. I follow. Hansel sobs and hits father with his arms and legs as he screams, “Mama not dead! No! No! No! Where is my mama! I want my mama!” Until he thoroughly exhausts himself and begins to sob into father’s shoulder. 

At last he falls asleep and father lays him in bed. I go downstairs and sit quietly with Ella. We take turns holding Gretel, who’s asleep. We don’t talk, just sit quietly. Eventually the doctor leaves and father comes downstairs he takes the baby and asks, “What’s her name?” 

“Gretel,” Ella whispers. We sit in silence for a moment and then Ella asks, “Father?” 

“Yes Ella?” 

“What are we going to do?” She asks drawing her knees to her chest and rocking back and forth. 

“I don’t know,” He says staring at the fire, “But we’re not going to give up.” 

“Father?” Ella asks again after another longer moment. 

“What is it now Ella?” He asks tiredly. 

“Mother said to tell you that she loved you and was thinking about you.” Ella says. 

Father smiles and then whispers, “Thank you. You two should go to bed, you’re tired and it’s been a long day. I’ll stay up with Gretel a while.” 

“Yes father,” We say. We tiredly head up the stairs to the loft room we share with Hansel.

Usually we talk for hours and either father or mother come up the stairs to tell us we’re being too loud and we’re gonna wake up Hansel. But tonight we’re silent. Dead silent.