Monique

God, why’d I run? Why’d I leave?
Him: Because you’re not good enough. You’ve never been good enough.

His voice echoed throughout her most inner thoughts.

Him: You’re broken. Pieces missing. Why would anyone ever want you?
Monique: Shut up.

People stared as she talked to herself. She kept running passed them all. Bolting in front of oncoming traffic and up the hills. God, fuck these fucking hills. She huffed as her lungs were set aflame.

Him: You’re a freak. An anomaly. Why would anyone else want you? To give you a home?
Monique: Shut up.
Him: A place of belonging?
Monique: Shut up!
Him: You can’t even teleport that far.
Monique: SHUT UP!
Him: Nor can you use your magic without being so emotional.
Monique: SHUT UP!
Him: Don’t kid yourself. You belong back with us. No one else will care you like we do.
Monique: Shut UP SHUT UP!!
Him: No one else will love you like we do.
Monique: SHUT UP
Him: No one else will ever love a monster like you more than I do.
Monique: SHUT UP!!!!

The more she shouted, the worse her voice got. She was screaming at the top of her lung, her voice becoming more and more hoarse as she continued to run. She then tripped and fell down passing out from literally running on empty. Her vision blurred as people came rushing to her. She heard a girl call out to her, but she just couldn’t keep awake.

~

When she finally came to it, she heard someone talking

Girl: Thanks so much for helping me and my friend out.
: You sure you girls don’t need any help?
Girl: Positive. Here, I’ll pay you back. Do you have Benvo?
: No need to. Just take care of yourselves.

Monique found herself laying on a girl’s lap. She had wavy mermaid like hair with colors of sea green infusing with sapphire blue. Her eyes sparked a Lapis Lazuli too.

Girl: Oh! You’re awake! Are you alright?

As she hurried to get up, the girl helped her up.

Girl: Don’t get up too quickly, you might get a head rush or lightheaded.
Monique: W-who are you?
Girl: Oh, pardon me. Where are my manners? My name is Karin. Karin von Solari. I’m Lee’s little sister. And I know you think he sent me in his stead, but he did not.
Monique: Then why are you here?

Karin looked around. She saw in front of them a dim sum place. Her eyes sparkled with excitement.

Karin: Ohmigosh!! I haven’t had dim sum in so long! Let’s eat here. My treat.
Monique: Uhhh?
Karin: You haven’t had much to eat, right? Come on~!

Before she could even reject or respond, her stomach voted for her. Please, dear god please, don’t let this be a trap. I literally would die if I got caught cause someone offered me free food. They entered in and were greeted. Karin asked to be sat down at a table meant for four.

Karin: You’re not a vegetarian…are you?
Monique: No.
Karin: Oh, thank goodness!

She stopped these ladies who were pushing carts, putting down a variety of interesting food.

Karin: Go ahead. Eat. I promise I’m not a dangerous person.
Monique: Sorry, I just have a hard time trusting anyone.
Karin: That’s understandable.

She started serving both her and Monique tea. She then grabbed her cup and started to take a sip, creating this odd yet comforting atmosphere.

Karin: Your life must’ve been terrible
Monique: You have no idea.
Karin: You can tell me if you’d like. But if you don’t it’s fine. I don’t want to force you to do things you don’t want to.

As she spoke, Monique noted the two how different the two siblings were. Whereas Lee came off like a person with a hero complex of some sorts, acting as if he felt the need to save her, Monique felt as if Karin was just someone she could spill her heart to. Like she could tell her all of her sins, everything she’d ever done wrong. Like she could be forgiven. Karin began eloquently eating her meal, gesturing to Monique to do the same. Monique slowly began to do the same.

Karin: You know, after meeting that peculiar group of people who were after you, I can see why you’d have issues with other people.

Monique looked down, avoiding eye contact once more.

Karin: From what I understand, all they wanted to do was take you away to just use you again and again. Perhaps cage you for good so you can’t escape anymore. Which is awful. You should be free. You don't deserve that kind of a thing.
Monique: And why would you think that? What makes you think a person like me deserves anything?
Karin: Why would you think you deserve anything bad?
Monique: Because…

As she started to explain, tears formed from the corner of her eyes. She tried holding them back. What’s the use of crying about it anyway?

Monique: Because that’s all I’ve ever done all of my life. Just one bad thing after another
Him: Like all those people you’ve killed.
Monique: Like the people I've killed.
Him: Like all those lives you destroyed.
Monique: And all those lives I destroyed.
Him: Why would you deserve anything when all you’ve done is take and take and take?
Monique: Why would I deserve anything at all when all I’ve done is take, take, and take.
Karin: But were those your true intentions? Or was it just because someone forced you to do that? Was it because you saw no other option or choice? Like you were trying to save someone? Or were you just trying to survive?

As Karin spoke, she knew she was right. Making a point. But that didn't quite settle in with Monique. She didn't want to be forgiven. She didn't want to be told it wasn't her fault.

Monique: What…what would you know about that? About anything I’ve done!? I've just met you! Don't act like you know me!

Tears started welding up in Karin’s eyes. It felt as if pricks were stabbing into Monique’s heart. Shit, I’m such an asshole. I just made her cry

Monique: I'm sorry.

Karin wiped her tears, shaking her head.

Karin: I’m pretty sure Lee told you some stuff about me, right? But he’s missed quite a few details. Like when he ran away…dad…dad always knew where he was. He always threatened to have him arrested for defaming him. A-and don’t get me wrong, to this day I don’t blame him for anything that’s happened. I…I just wanted to protect him…so I tried everything I could to distract dad from anything involving him. And I know this doesn’t relate much…and…and I know that you probably don’t think this way…but whatever you’ve done…

She sniffled. Her head tilted a bit and her lips widened to a smile. Something so innocent yet so natural. As if it were a friend conversing with another friend.

Karin: Whatever you’ve done none of it is your fault. You don’t deserve to feel so troubled for any of it. And I know deep down inside, you tried to do what’s right. Even when your team was against you, you kept trying.
Monique: H-how do you know that?
Karin: Your team was severely harsh on the illusion of you Alexis made. They said they were going to lock you away, punish you for fleeing from the job and for saving those folks you were supposed to get rid of. That they would be sure those souls you saved would get their due punishment. I’m kinda interested to see what’s going to happen when they find out that spell disperses. Either way, that’s not the life you deserve. You deserve better.

Hearts strings started to detach. Was that what really happened? Were those the words she needed to hear? She knew deep down inside not to question what happened when she disappeared with Lee. She knew that Karin was telling the truth. Because if you had known how Dr B raised them, it was the reality of her situation. The reality of her life. They never loved her, never respected her. All the things they ever did was for Doctor B. Always for Doctor B. A smidge of conscious? An act of bravery? They were always extinguished within moments. Always a scar to remind her never to defy them. But she was alone in that. So, when Karin said what she said, Monique wailed, sobbing her broken heart out. Karin reached out to hold her. She cried into her arms.

Karin: It’s okay, it’s alright. You’re not a bad person at all. And I just want you to know, if anything, you deserve the best of things life has to offer. And I—we’re here to give that to you…if you’re willing to take it.
Monique: What…what if I...I st-still don’t feel like I...I deserve it. Wh-what if those people never forgive me for the damages I-I’ve c-caused or the des-destruction I’ve reigned?

An elbow gently landed on Monique’s shoulder.

Stranger: Then find a way to atone for those. Join our Corps or be a good person. Whatever it takes to feel like you’ve atoned for the sins you think you’ve committed.
Karin: Alexis! You’re here.

The blonde girl, called Alexis, with a few strands of hair sticking out like antennae sat down at our table. She stared intensely at Monique, her eyes glimmering like shiny peridots. She shoved a box of tissues in front of Monique, gesturing her to clean herself up.

Karin: Where’s Danny and Lee?
Alexis: They needed some alone time to talk about boy stuff, figured it’d be best to have a girl’s night out. Let the boys do whatever they want.

Alexis and Monique’s eyes met. While Monique was trying to clean herself up, Alexis scanned her from top to bottom, emanating a menacing aura. Monique couldn’t comprehend whether it was because she did not like seeing someone cry or if the events that took place at the villa had made Alexis suspicious of her. Alexis then sighed.

Alexis: Look, I don’t know what your sad story is and if you wanna share it you’re more than welcomed to. But whatever you’re fucking so called team, or family or whatever in the fucking world you wanna call them, you know as well as I do that all they’ve been doing is feeding you bullshit and you know it. And I know it. And everyone at this table knows it.
Karin: I know this is very confusing for you, especially since this feels so rushed. However, this world is slowly attracting beasts that don’t particularly belong here, which would cause trouble for the natives of this world.
Alexis: Heck, all of us being here for too long puts it at a strain.

For a brief moment, Monique’s entire demeanor exuded guilt. As if this was her fault that the world may fall apart. That perhaps at the first sign of distortion, she should have left. But before she could say anything, Alexis slammed her fist at the table.

Alexis: And don’t you fucking dare blame yourself for that. You didn’t choose this path and for fucks sake you didn’t choose to stay here. But you can choose to leave.
Monique: Wh-why are you all being so nice to me?
Karin: Cause, we understand, more than anything, what you’re going through. And we want to help you.
Alexis: Actually, I just personally don’t want to resort to option B where I kick your ass to high heavens and dragging you out. Besides, the Solari’s get very attached to outsiders who are just like them.
Karin: Hey! What’s that supposed to mean?
Alexis: That you and your brother have a tendency to adopt stragglers. Why do you think Ben and Danny was invited to live with y’all.

Karin laughed as Alexis smiled.

Karin: So, will you come with us?
Alexis: Would be thousands better than being with them.

Debatably, she could have been walking into another trap, another place seething with disparity which would instantly suck her soul away. But in that space, where carts of food rolled on carpeted floors and two little girls were giving her another chance at life, this wave of security and familiarity rushed in. Perhaps in a different time, in a different place, those two were the closest thing akin to friends, possibly even sisters. Where once there was doubt and insecurity had rewritten itself to confidence and stability.

Monique: Yes.