I had to put up with several glares from random adults on the way home, and then when I got home, of course I had to listen to lectures from the family.

“I heard you disobeyed Marilyn!”  My grandmother sounded aghast.  “How could you do that?  How could you dishonor our family like that?”

Right.  It was dishonoring the family to accidentally splash her – with just a couple of drops of water – and then point out that her whole thing about me “teaching someone a lesson” would just result in me getting beaten up and actually make Marilyn look bad.  Right.  That was all bad.

“Marilyn is our next hunt chief,” my uncle pointed out, his lecturing tone turned on, “she must be obeyed.  You are so rebellious, I’m surprised she picked you as one of her people, but she did, which is a great honor.  You should be striving to make sure she never changes her mind!”

My aunt tsked condescendingly.  “I suppose it’s because your mother wasn’t from here.  She didn’t understand our ways, either.  It was for the best when she left, but you have far too much you’ve taken from her.”

“Winter,” my dad added, “you need to at least try to support her.  At the very least, just – just obey her when she gives an order, okay?  It’s not that hard.”

While the adults in the house all stood around and told me how horrible I was, I stood there, feeling a little bored with all of this.  It might have bothered me more if this wasn’t an almost daily thing, but I’d gotten used to being yelled at by all of them and ostracized by my cousins and, well, almost everyone.

I had a weird name, my eyes looked a little weird, and I was eternally apathetic.  It made people target me when I was younger, kapra and hydra alike.  Mostly words, because it was actually pretty rare to get into real fights with anyone, despite the ongoing war, although I’d occasionally been on the receiving end of some lovely magic.  But mostly words.  Lots of words.  The thing is, I’d gotten used to unkind words be hurled at me from a very young age, so I’d learned to just not care.  To be apathetic.  To survive.

My family lived in a multi-family home, meaning my grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc., all lived in the same giant house.  My mom had left when I was young, unwilling to stay and be a part of this whole stupid war, but I had remained behind with my kapra father so I could still live by the lake.  Because my dad was solo parenting me, my aunts and uncles had felt obligated to try to have more than a helpful hand in my raising.  Sometimes I actually thought they felt more responsible for teaching me how to be a proper kapra than my dad did, because he was a fairly passive man.

Not that it worked.  Clearly.  All my relatives lecturing me day in and out, telling me I should dress different, or act different, or talk different, or whatever.  I think if they’d have gotten away with telling me I should just look different, too, they would have, but at least all they did was try to completely ignore my mother’s ethnic influence of my genes and just try to force me into the typical mold of what a kapra from our town should look like and wear.  Oh, and might as well give me a rulebook on how to act.  Four of them, in fact, over the years.

I ignored all of them.  Actually, technically not true – I used them as a bookstand by my bed, but that was it.  I never read any of them.

When I finally managed to escape from the annoying relatives, I headed up to my room, which I locked – or otherwise I’d have cousins bursting in to be a pain and add to the lectures, because somehow what my 9-year-old cousin said must be more convincing than all the adults, right? – and then briefly looked over my homework for the night.  I halfheartedly did a few of the assignments, or maybe…a quarter of them, but there was just no motivation to actually do homework here.

I sighed a little and looked out the window.  One year, and I’d graduate.  And then what?  Stay?  Stay in a town where it would be like this for the rest of my life?  Stupid fighting over stupid reasons that no one actually remembered the real origin of?  Being told I should just be a good little minion even if I had absolutely zero motivation to help Marilyn and this war?

Or leave?  Head away from this town, this lake, having to consider whether to live near another body of water again or just forget about that and focus on a town I liked?  It might be nice to get away from here, where the whole kapra versus hydra thing wasn’t everyone’s focus, and maybe even learn what it was like for most of the rest of the supernaturals, who lived hiding amongst humans.  Go to a school where maybe I’d actually learn something?  It might be tough, striking out on my own where I knew I’d have no support from my family and marginal education to help me out there, so it wouldn’t be easy, leaving.  But it might be happier.

There were a lot of reasons to leave, really, but there were two very good reasons to stay.  And those were the ones I struggled with.

One of those reasons was waiting for me when I snuck out of my window after midnight, climbing across the roof and down a tree before sneaking off into the woods surrounding the town, deep enough into the trees that no one should spot me.  I’d taken this route so many times I knew it perfectly, even in the dark.

The hydra boy was waiting for me, sitting on a log, with a small lantern dimly lighting around him.  He was frowning at nothing in particular, and didn’t even look up when I came to sit next to him.

“I can’t believe they can’t see the futility of it all,” he burst out.  “It’s just always the same thing, arguing the same point, just in a different context.  And it’s not going anywhere.  It’s like nothing ever changes no matter what, you know?  Supposedly we’re not supposed to get into full-on fights, just maybe some magic exchange, at least until we’re adults.  But you know, my neighbor’s kid started elementary school this week, and they weren’t able to keep an eye on him every day, so he got roughed up by some kapras.  He’s got some bruises and stuff and is scared to go back to school.  Then of course his parents are mad, my parents are mad, everyone’s mad, so they’ll retaliate on some kapra or other, and then they’ll retaliate, and it just becomes this endless cycle because no one can bother to see how toxic it is and actually try to break it!”  He huffed in frustration.

“And you!”  He suddenly turned to me.  “Why don’t you ever say any of this to Marilyn’s face?  I know you don’t care for her, I mean, hell, half the hydra side of school knows that, and they haven’t even talked to you like I have.  If anyone should stand up to her, it should be you!”

His anger wasn’t enough to break my apathy.  For one thing, I’d heard it all before.  Same as with all the other rants and lectures.  Given that we’d been friends for several years now, I’d definitely heard this speech over and over again.

“I’m ‘not allowed’ to push back against Marilyn,” I pointed out evenly, for probably the hundredth time.  “The entire town would be up in arms about it and potentially shun my whole family.  Refuse to sell us food and electricity and whatever.  Rebellion isn’t allowed, even if the leaders are dumb.”

Mark threw his hands into the air.  “Yeah, yeah, and see, that’s dumb.  Both sides, we’re actually more alike than different, you know?  Anyone who dares say anything against the current regime is likely to be shunned and excluded and basically bullied into cooperating.  No one’s allowed to have an opinion other than the one that’s existed for decades.  Centuries, even.  And why?  Why?  We don’t even remember why the hydra and kapra fight started, for crying out loud!  Why do we insist on blindly following along and just being angry at the other side because they’re ‘the other side’?!”

I let him rant, because that was what he really wanted to do, not have me answer him.  He wasn’t wrong, though, and we both were pretty much on the same page about that.

Maybe that was why we were soulmates.  We’d figured that out one time when some of his hydra buddies were taunting me about my name and I’d just ignored them, but he’d had enough time watching the whole thing uneasily to figure out there was something different about me.  Discovering that we had a soulmate from the other side of town had startled both of us, but in time, it had become kind of a comfort.  There was one person out there who didn’t buy into all the stupid rules and nonsense of either side and was safe to talk to about how we were really feeling.  Who wouldn’t feel obligated to go report us because we betrayed our species, or whatever nonsense might apply.  It was almost easier to have a hydra friend than a kapra friend, because I knew I couldn’t tell kapra that I thought Marilyn was annoying and the whole feud was pointless, but I could tell Mark.

Granted, neither of us could tell anyone else about our friendship.  We’d been really secretive about it initially when we found out we were soulmates, because we were scared people would misunderstand, and it turned out we were right in that call.  We’d learned from some local history that on the four occasions other people had claimed to have soulmates from the other side of town, the people had mysteriously disappeared soon after.  We weren’t sure if they’d just been kicked out of town or actually killed, but we hadn’t wanted to take that chance.  Instead, we just met secretly and tried to make sure no one ever caught on that we were more than strangers if we saw each other in school.

It was a pain, to be honest.  Soulmates should be something to be celebrated, and while Mark and I were both glad to have someone who understood – something which we both seemed to need, actually – it still sucked that we couldn’t talk to each other at school and had to sneak around at night.  We couldn’t talk regularly as a result.  We sometimes texted, but tried to be super careful about it, using pseudonyms and stuff, just in case either of our families ever got a hold of our phones and tried to figure out who we were texting.  Given that my cousins seemed to believe that they were entitled to know every detail about my life, it was a very real risk.

“I just wish things would change,” Mark wrapped up his rant at last, a little more subdued now.  “I mean, my neighbor’s just a kid.  He shouldn’t get roughed up.  But I know he’s not the only one, and that some hydras do that to kapras, too, and it’s all just – it’s a mess.  We need a negotiator or something to come and just, you know, make everyone get along.  Make people stop all of this.  But no one’s going to volunteer for that, so I don’t know what’ll happen.”

He tilted his head back to stare up at the sky moodily.  “Eventually, they’ll have to figure out something, you know.  There are human towns on the lake now, too.  It’s a big lake, so it hasn’t affected any of us yet, but…someday, it will.  Someday those towns will grow, or humans might start venturing more towards our side of the lake.  Someday it’ll become harder and harder to still be supernatural only.  Someday we’ll be faced with the reality of no longer getting to live openly as supernaturals, and then what?  We keep having the war in secret?  It’d make a lot more sense to me for us to work together to protect our town, but noooo, no one could ever think of that because that would involve working with a kapra!  Or a hydra!  The horror!”  He rolled his eyes and shook his head a little.  “If people would just pause for long enough to forget that the other person is supposedly ‘the enemy,’ they might realize we actually aren’t so different.”

Mark was very passionate about this, but he’d learned never to say anything to other hydras.  He used to try, but he’d been bullied for it until he became pretty withdrawn and timid.  When he’d met me, he’d started to let his passion burn again, but only when we were alone.

In some ways, we were opposites.  We were from opposite sides of towns, boy and girl, passionate versus apathetic.  Yet we still got each other and without him, sometimes I thought I’d go crazy.

“It’s so dumb,” he finished, almost at a whisper, his shoulders slumping.  “But no one ever listens.”

I looked at his depressed face, wishing there was some answer to give.  “I do, but that doesn’t count for much.  Neither of us have a voice.”  I sighed and looked up at the sky, too.  “The only people who are allowed voices are respected adults or future leaders.  Aka people who plan to continue the feud or already have.  It’s – it’s not a good system.”

“It’s not fair,” he grumbled.  “I’ve thought about just running away the minute graduation is over, but then what?  I just leave the town behind?  Everyone here will still be engaging in the same stupid war for the same stupid reasons for who knows how long.  I don’t seem to have any way to change that, though.  So…is it best to just give up?  Save myself and get out?”

He turned his head to look at me, hopelessness written all over his face.

Mark was idealistic, but he had no idea how to achieve the dream he wanted.  Peace.  And honestly, I had no idea, either.

“I don’t think either of us can carry the burden of stopping the war,” I responded slowly.  “As much as we want to, it would take a lot more than just us, and people won’t listen.  I don’t know, maybe something big needs to happen before they’ll be startled out of their rut and realize this isn’t working.  I honestly can’t think of anything that would make both sides really sit up and pay attention to anything other than the war, though.  So I think – yeah, escaping is valid.  We can’t save the town, so…just save ourselves, I guess.”

“I thought you weren’t sure about going to college?”  He sounded confused.

“I’m not.”  I sighed slightly.  “I’m not at all.”

Mark might leave, which would mean one less thing holding me here, but there was still the other thing.  The one that wouldn’t change and that I didn’t want to risk missing out on if I left town, even for a few years.

After all, I didn’t know how much time I had left with her.