"How can you slumber at night, knowing that you have torn away every dream, every hope, every memory that they've ever had, all in the name of riches? Are their lives truly only worth a few jewels, a golden necklace, or few pieces of linen to you?" He spat the last sentence in an incredulous whisper, fury brewing when his words conjured not a single shift upon the Alpha's somewhat blank expression. 

"No." Einar replied quietly, willing his mate to understand as shame suffused his being. If only he could find the right words to explain. "I do not–"

"Then why?" Vali interrupted, shaking his head with mistrust. This Alpha made no sense.

Einar's head fell as the musty scent of distress weaved in with caramel, making his head swim with despair. He didn't want to tell the truth then, to divulge the reality behind his pitiful existence. Would his Omega run away if he knew, disgusted by his fated Alpha's inability to protect him, to provide the life that he deserved?

Einar clutched the tip of his index finger with the fist of his opposite hand, desperate for touch as embarrassment sunk deep into his bones.

He averted his gaze, pupils settling back on the dusty floorboards. He couldn't bear to witness the look of disgust that would surely overcome his fated's eyes once he said it.

"I am a slave."

Vali's gasp was audible.

"W-what? But that is not possible, you are–"

Einar sat up only enough to reveal the brand that marred his chest, resting just over his heart. Two overlapping circles, the universal symbol of bondage. Of slavery.

"It was foolish of me to bring you here." He croaked, the harsh tremble of his chin making the Alpha's husky voice sound frail. A silent "but" hung like a noose, swaying in the air between them. "I could not leave you. I could not leave you." 

Einar's last words were but a whisper.

Vali could only stare, shock smudging through everything that he thought he knew. But no matter how much his mind tried to find fault in his Alpha's statement, there the brand still stood, forever engrained in his chest as indisputable proof of ownership. 

It all made sense then: the maddened, terrified look in his eye when they'd first met back at the horse house, the undeniable crackle of a fated bond extending between them. The way he pulled the cart that Vali cowered in throughout the long journey without a single break to rest. The humble state of his quarters. The way he'd called that man, 'sir'...

In less than a moment, the Alpha before him transformed in front of his eyes. 

Yes, he still carried the weight of his sins, atrocities that even Odin himself would likely look upon with scorn. But even so, no longer was he the sole perpetrator. Now, he, himself, was a victim too.

Two truths, existing together in a curious dichotomy that made Vali's nerves finally dull for the first time since he'd heard that scream ring out over the steep steps by the cliff. 

Truthfully, Vali had no idea what to say, now. How could one follow up such an admission?

"Where is your stew?" The Omega asked instead, suddenly noticing the one-sided state of dinner. His voice was gentle again, and Einar bristled, unsure whether that was a good or a bad thing. 

The Alpha wanted to lie, to tell his fated that he had eaten before he'd come back in order to ease his worry. But once again, guilt clung to him like a tick.

"Those of my... distinction receive only one ration."

Vali looked down, staring down at the measly remains of his duck stew with newfound horror. 

How could he have given his ration away without so much as a single beat of hesitation? Especially when he had so clearly exerted a horrendous amount of energy dragging that horsecart all of this way?

His legs flew from under him, and in less than a second Vali was kneeling in front of the giant, shoving the bowl into his bare chest with tumultuous eyes.

"I am not hungry anymore! Please, you finish it!" 

Einar blinked, a clash of emotions warring inside of him. On one hand – despite the fact that he still could not gather the bravery to meet his mate's eyes – his heart soared at the idea that his Omega had willingly come so close. He breathed in deeply through his nose, savoring the heavenly waft of caramel that graced his senses. 

However, on the other hand, his stomach churned with discomfort at the idea of taking food away from his mate for his own selfish gain, no matter how much his weary body craved sustenance. No, he'd already been selfish enough to last a hundred lifetimes in this single day.

Shaking his head, Einar placed a hand on the edge of the bowl, pressing it back in the direction from whence it came. "Do not worry. Watching you fill your stomach fills me up just the same," He patted his chest. "Right here."

Vali balked, pushing the bowl right back at the stubborn Alpha in a reverse tug-of-war. "But... You must eat something!" He cried, unable to understand why his stupid giant would say no when he so clearly had so, so many muscles to upkeep. Even twelve bowls seemed like too little for a man of his stature.

Einar only shook his head again, pressing the bowl back. He had to up the ante if he wanted to win this struggle. And if there was any battle that he would willingly defy his fated over, it was this. 

"I will have more rations later. If you do not eat it, it will go cold, and only be wasted." He leaned his upper body forward a few inches, eyes pleading as the space between them narrowed. "Please. I must see you healthy." His eyelids fluttered shut for a moment before re-opening. "I beg you."

There it was again, that beg. Breath hitching, Vali released a barely audible whine, all too aware of how close their faces were. He sat back on his heels, lowering the bowl back into his lap with defeat as the floorboards creaked beneath him. Vali pursed his lips into an adorable pout, and Einar's mind imploded as he imagined kissing it right off of his face.

"Promise me you will eat later?" He asked, looking up at Einar from between long, white and black eyelashes.

Einar nodded resolutely, settling back in against the wall. "On Odin's good name."

Only then did Vali sigh, giving his Alpha one, final look before finishing off the bowl in just a few, hearty gulps. He wiped his mouth a little with his sleeve afterward, fat from the duck meat clinging to his lips and making them shine in the firelight. When Vali finally set the empty bowl to the side, and Einar checked to ensure its completion, the Alpha finally managed to settle a little, his instincts content with providing at least this one thing for his mate. 

His Omega. Einar wanted nothing more than to pull him in close, to bury his face into those loose, white and black curls and breathe. He wanted to savor the moments that they had together to the fullest, an alarm ringing in the back of his head and reminding him that their time was fleeting at best. That, in his current state of having zero means to adequately conceal his fated enough to keep his existence a secret forever, one day, this would come all have to come to an end.

The thought of being torn away from his mate made it feel as if every vein and artery had been severed from his heart one by one, leaving nothing but a hollow hole in its place.

Before he could sink too far into an existential stream of thought, his mate's gentle voice smoothed over his brain.

"When you... were in my village. Did you happen to see a short Omega? He has long black hair, pretty, blue eyes, and really big smile."

Einar tilted his head, blinking as he tried to recall the events of the raid. Despite his best efforts, aside from his clandestine meeting with his fated, everything else was muddled, filled with years upon years of blurry faces, blood, and dissociation.

They had left the village that morning empty and reeking of murder, double-checking every limp body to ensure their souls were truly gone. Guiscard wasn't particularly fond of leaving many – if any – alive to retaliate against his encampment.

With a heavy heart, Einar shook his head. 

"I did not see anyone fitting that description. I... I am so sorry for your loss."

Vali choked, one hand flying to his throat and the other clutching the floorboards in front of him as tears of anguish blurred his vision.

Tofa... Poor, sweet Tofa... 

He shook his head before lifting it, expression dire as he looked up at his mate. Begging, pleading. Anything.

"No, we have to go back, we have to, we have to–" Vali's breathing picked up, body undulating with the force his lungs used to expel oxygen. 

And then, he screamed. "But I promised him, I promised I'd come back! I– mmph!"

Einar's soul raged, teeth clenching with heartache as he pinned Vali backward against his chest, wrapping the small man up in his arms and covering his mouth with a tight palm.

He had to do it. As much as his chest throbbed with penitence, he had to stifle the sound, or else someone would certainly come poking around, investigating the source of the disturbance. 

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry." The Alpha whispered repeatedly as he closed his eyes, unable to watch as Vali thrashed wildly in his arms and sobbed from a place deeper than his soul resided. Einar remained completely still throughout all of it as muffled cries of hopelessness moistened his palm and his apologies ran together until they felt completely meaningless on his tongue.

It took a long while, a length of time that Einar would have described as no shorter than an eon, before Vali finally succumbed to his grief. Screams turned to sobs, and sobs turned to hiccups until only hushed agony remained. Eventually, his breaths evened out too, and muscles progressively softened until he finally fell into the cold abyss of unconsciousness against the broad expanse of Einar's chest.

The Alpha couldn't remember the last time he'd been seized with such overwhelming emotions. But as they all crashed upon him at once now – sticking deep into his mortal being like barbs dipped in poison – Einar allowed his own tears to stream as he faced the ultimate judge – himself. 

Brows heavy, jaw tight, and tears hot, the Alpha whispered quietly into the darkness.

"What have I done... What have I done."

God, this chapter broke me 🥹

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Xoxo, Alex ❤️