Liam awoke screaming and crying. He knew that he was too old to be reacting like this because of a dream but he couldn't stop himself.

he had dreamed that he was watching a wolf dismember a boy, it had ripped the boys legs off then his arms and then chewed open the boys stomach and started to eat. The boy screamed and cried and begged the entire time it was happening. No matter what the wolf did, the boy didn't die.

It seemed like it went on for an eternity and the entire time it happened liam watched. He cried. He did not cry because he felt pity or sadness. He did not cry because he wanted to look away or because of the gruesome sight.He did not cry because of the boy's screams. He cried because he felt ashamed. He cried because he liked it. Enjoyed it. Craved it.

He cried  because he wanted to watch. He needed to watch. Because he knew that it was wrong. He didn't want to enjoy it but it didn't matter because he did. And then he was in his bed.  He got up and ran as fast as he could to his parents door, still sobbing. As he opened the door he stopped, And he stared.

And he waited. Hoping that somehow, some way, what he was seeing was a hallucination. Just a bad dream. That he might still be asleep in his bed. But he knew that he was not, it was real, and his beloved parents were both on the ground. covered in their own blood. mutilated, dismembered. And dead.

He wondered if it was a punishment from a higher being for his lack of emotion. He wondered if it was his fault and if it wouldn't have happened if he was less violent. But even as he cried at the sight. Even as he looked at his beloved parents,the only people that had ever truly loved him and cared for him, the people that had given birth to and raised him.

The people that had protected him and cared for him even at his worst. The people that were now both reduced to little pieces that were now scattered across a stone floor that was now coated in guts and blood. He knew Deep down. even if he cried. even if it was just a little. He felt joy. He liked it. He liked the blood and it made him feel good. 

And because of it he felt guilt.