I tossed and turned all night long until six am when Viktor finally came back to the room. He took his suit off and went to the bathroom before he slipped into the bed beside me and tried to remain still. 

“Did you just get finished?” 

“Did I wake you?” he asked, and turned to look at me in the false dark, created by the blinds. 

“No, I’ve been tossing and turning all night long.”

“If you need something for that, check the medicine cabinet in the bathroom. There are all kinds of sleep products. I use them when I can’t sleep by myself.” Viktor said, rolling back over and tucking the pillow under his arm. I watched him fall asleep and hated how peaceful he looked just like that. 

I wondered what exactly his meeting was about. It took around ten hours. It was probably more than just the meeting. He most likely had work to do, even before Viktor was up to his neck in work all the time. 

I watched him some more, finally relaxing beside him. It was moments like this one that scared me. He didn’t look like the type of man who had confined me to a wing of his family mansion, and refused to let me go. All of that because I refused to be his partner, his lover. Look where I ended up. By his damned side again. 

“Ilya told me you’ve taken bullets for me, you stupid man.” I whispered, before turning over and closing my eyes. I was the reason so many had already died, and I didn’t want to add to that. So many others hadn’t escaped their death like I had. I would be guilty for that my entire life. The death of Lev and his sister’s parents weighed heavy on me, every single day. I didn’t need anyone else’s death on my shoulders, too. 

Sleep finally came to me. But something disturbed it when the warm pillow underneath my head moved. I grunted and flicked an eye open, confirming that I was indeed using Viktor Russo like a pillow. 

“Did you sleep well?” he asked, and I sat up, moving away from him. I didn’t feel all that well rested. 

“No. Not at all.” I said, and tried to get out of bed, but Viktor pulled me back into the bed. “Rest. You didn’t seem like you were having a good time. When did you start having nightmares, Nikita?” he questioned me, and I shrugged, not really wanting to start a conversation about this subject. 

“When is breakfast?” I asked and pulled away from Viktor. 

“Whenever you’re hungry, I’ll show you to the kitchen,” he said, and got out of bed, and went to get dressed. “Nikita, I pulled you against me when you started thrashing in your sleep.”

“Next time, just leave me. If I disturb you, wake me up. I’ll sleep somewhere else.” I said, grabbing random clothing and heading to the bathroom to change. I knew about the nightmares, but they had been gone for so long, and now they were back. Pushing the uncomfortable feelings inside of me away, I changed and left the bathroom. 

“Come here and let me tame your mane,” Viktor said. I wasn’t in the mood for this, but I sat down and allowed him to brush my hair. For the fact that right now, if I did it, I would cause myself pain.

I played with the gold ring on my finger, watching it spin around and around. “How is your arm feeling now?”

“Are you concerned about me, Viktor?”

“Me, concerned for you? According to you, I’m not capable of those emotions, so I’m not sure,” he said, wrapping my hair into a bun. “There I’m finished.”

“I’m too tired to fight with you today, Viktor.” I sighed, standing up and looking at him. “Don’t stay up all hours of the night working. It can wait.”

I tried to ignore the smile on his face, but it was eating at me. I just wanted to hit him a little. Make him remove the damned thing from his face. But I knew it wouldn’t do any good. Instead, I took a deep breath and left the room after slipping on my shoes. My heart was pounding with anger and frustration. Viktor took the lead to the kitchen, and it surprised me to see a few people preparing food. 

“Oh, good! You two are awake. I was hoping you might be. I took the liberty of preparing a few different things for breakfast. But if there is anything you need, please let me know and I’ll have it made.” The woman from last night said as she walked into the kitchen. 

“I’ll take a cup of coffee brought to the lounge. You know how I like it. Nikita, would you like something?”

My head was starting to throb now, and I had a pretty good idea it was from the booze last night. Wine always gave me a hangover to some extent, but the rest didn’t seem to. 

“A black coffee, two sugars and a handful of ice in it. Could I get a side of some pain relievers, too?” I asked, and she looked hopeful. 

“I’ll get you that coffee, and I’ll see what I can do for those pain relievers.”

“Thank you.”

“I’ll offer something else too along the side for an alcohol pairing, not just wines,” she said, and walked away. 

“Come Nikita, let’s head to the lounge. Breakfast will still be a bit,” he said, and left the kitchen, and I had no choice but to follow him out. He sat down first, and his hair was sticking up and I couldn’t help myself as I walked by. I touched his hair, laying the hair down. 

“Nikita.”

“It was sticking up.” I muttered and sat down on the other end of the couch, away from Viktor. “Viktor, I want to ask you something.” 

“Ask me anything, Nikita.”

“Have you ever taken a bullet for me?”

“For you? Now why would I do that?” Viktor said, slyly, and I could see he was trying to cover the truth. 

“I just wondered. Someone said something to me about it and I—--” Viktor was quick to cut me off. “Someone, you mean Ilya.” Viktor hissed, his eyes taking that sharp look to them. “I wouldn’t believe a word he says, Nikita. He’s a blood Russo too. We can lie easily.”

“Believe me, I am well aware of that.” I said, void of emotion, and looked away from him. This man had constantly fed me lies and bullshit the entire time he kept me on his arm. I didn’t even understand when his obsession with me had started. 

“You seem to have made a good impression on my cousin, regardless.”

“Good? Hardly. He tried to eat me the first time we met.” 

“Yes, that is one of his new quirks, but Vito is good for him. Despite my unwillingness in that relationship,” Viktor confessed. 

“Viktor, I know you had nothing to do with Ilya being abducted and everything that happened to him. Lev investigated you.” 

“Good. As he should have. All signs pointed to me, but the truth was I never wanted this fucking position. I just wanted to be there for Ilya. In the end, even that wasn’t manageable for me.”

“If you stopped pushing so hard on Ilya and his relationship, you would have a better one. He would die to protect them, Matteo and Vito. They are everything to him, but that doesn’t mean you can’t fit in there. Give it time, and you will—---” 

Viktor cut me off again, and he was mad. I could see his eyebrow twitching. “Time, huh? Did time fix the relationship you have with Lev? A little birdy told me you’re the reason his parents are dead.” 

“I’ve lost my appetite. Excuse me.” I muttered, standing up and leaving the lounge room. I knew Viktor was a jerk, but even this was extra for him, at least for me. I was sure one night I had gotten drunk and confessed my sins to Viktor about my parents and my ‘adopted’ parents being murdered, but I didn’t think that he would be that quick to figure out Lev’s part in this entire thing, and then use it against me. Turns out even that was fair game to be used against me. I was used to it from Lev, but from others, I wasn’t. Remembering where the balcony was, I made my way out there and looked off into the distance. Looking down over the side, I realised I could get down onto the ground. Heading back to the room, I grabbed my phone and snuck back to the balcony. Tucking my phone into my pocket, I hoped these terrible form fitting khakis would hold up. Slinging myself over the side of the balcony, there was a decorative wall using open holed bricks, and I used it to get down. 

Wiping off my hands on my pants, I turned around and Viktor was inside, looking at me through the window. Slowly sipping his coffee. He opened the window and spoke. “Nikita, are you intending to go somewhere?”

I shrugged and ignored him. I didn’t want to speak to him. He didn’t deserve my words. Walking off down the grass, I made it to a fence blocking off the entire property. There was a road on the other side. I could hear the cars. 

The top of the fence was pointy, and I didn’t really want to be impaled with spikes. Walking the fence line, I found a gate and pulled the latch. It opened. The guard on the other side seemed mildly surprised to see me. He was saying a bunch of things I didn’t understand. 

“Move, let me through.” I hissed, growing frustrated with this man. There was going to be a clear language barrier here. “I’m going to regret this.” I muttered, before getting close enough to the guard to drive my knee into his stomach. He hit the ground, and I screamed I was sorry as I ran. The grass on the property seemed to be never ending, hell the property alone seemed never ending.

Another gate and fence was around this part of the property, too. Only thing was, Viktor seemed to be waiting patiently at this gate. “What was wrong with using the front door?”