Jack

It's been a long day. 

I can't remember the last time I felt this tired. I have a new respect for my father. He did this every day? Being a wood cutter is hard. 

I wipe the sweat from my brow and look up at the setting sun. I breath in the scent of fresh dirt and rotting wood around me. I breath in and out: One. Two. Three. 

I open my eyes and sling my axe over my shoulder. Before long the little cabin comes into view. I whistle a mournful toon as I near my once happy home. The windows are bright and I hear Goldilocks squealing from inside. I rub my temple at the shrill sound. I stomp the mud off my boots on the porch and lean the axe against the wall. I push the door open and blink. 

Goldilocks lounges on my mother's old chair, her feet are bare and stuck high up in the air. She squawks at Ella, "Can you believe what happened in town the other day?" She chatters on and on occasionally interrupting herself to twitter, "Missed a spot!" 

Thumbelina lays on the floor holding a book above above her head, she's sounding out the letters and looks very focused. 

And Ella, dear Ella, is on her hands and knees scrubbing the floor. She looks bedraggled and tired. Her bun is falling out and her face is flushed from working. She looks up when I enter and smiles. I smile back. 

"Why'd you stop scrubbing? There's still cinder stains on the floor," Goldilocks screeches. Ella's lips purse and she takes a deep breath. She brushes a stray hair from her face leaving a black soot mark and gets back to work. I go to join her as Goldilocks continues, "As I was saying-" 

"Jack?" I hear Thumbelina yell. She sits up. 

"Yeah?"

"Can you help me with the bigger words?" 

"Sure," I join her on the floor. 

"I'm here," She says pointing to a word. "What is that word?" 

"Embroider," I say glancing at the book. 

"Em-broy-der," She repeats her face squished into concentration, "And what does al-che-mee mean?" 

"That's alchemy, it's the study of how to turn normal objects into gold using non-magic means-what book are you reading anyway?" I ask curiously taking it from her. 

"The legend of Rumpelstiltskin; I found it on mother's dresser." She takes her book back and bends down over it. 

"What's it about?" I ask. 

"It's about a girl who has to turn straw into gold, but she doesn't know alchemy so she makes a deal with a little man named Rumpelstiltskin, he agrees to spin the straw into gold for her if she gives him her first born child." 

"Huh, does she have to give him the kid?" 

"No, there was a catch...She had three tries to guess his name and if she could then she would keep the baby, she did, so she didn't have to give up the child. Mother says it isn't real though." 

I grin, "Did you think it was?" 

"Of course," Thumbelina says. 

"Thumbelina; you can't believe in every little elf and fairy you read about." 

Her eyes grow big and concerned, "But Jack, mother didn't say Rumpelstiltskin wasn't real, she just said that there was never a catch to his deals." 

I laugh. 

"Why are you laughing?" Thumbelina asks. 

"Oh it's just funny." 

"What's funny?" She asks indignantly. 

"You," I grin, "At least I like one person in my new family." 

She smiles, "You really like me?" 

"Yep, I think you're great." 

She throws her arms around my neck and hugs me. "Thank you for helping me Jack! I'm so glad I have someone to help me with my reading now! Mother and Goldilocks never did!" 

"It isn't my fault you're a dumb little baby!" Goldilocks yells. 

"Am not!" Thumbelina yells. 

"Are so!" Goldilocks screeches. 

"Am not!" Thumbelina shouts. 

"Are-" 

"Girls girls!" The door opens and Mrs. Diamond sweeps into the room. 

"Mother!" Goldilocks and Thumbelina yell. 

They get up and run to her. She hugs Goldilocks and then kisses both girls on the forehead. 

"What a day I had," Mrs. Diamond proclaims smoothly, "Jack you left your axe outside leaning against the wall, put it away now, and rebuild the fire;" she snaps, "And how were my two angels? Mommy missed you," She drawls sweetly, "Is dinner ready yet Ella? I said to have it ready when I was here; go and fetch it!" She orders, "Tell me all about your day sweetie," She smiles at Goldilocks. 

I go out front and look at the woods around us. I reach down for the axe and then it clicks. I burst back into the house and shout, "Where are Hansel and Gretel?" 

"Jack!" She yells, "Is that any way to speak to your mother?" 

Ella runs back into the room, she looks frightened. "No, and if you were my mother I would apologize. Where are Hansel and Gretel?" I yell again.

Mrs. Diamond's eyes are so tiny she looks like a snake, her demeanor changes and she tries a different approach, "Jack, you must be hungry. Ella would you get Jack something to eat?" 

Ella doesn't move. I take a breath and carefully say each word with deliberate purpose, "Where are Hansel and Gretel?" 

Mrs. Diamond's eyes go icy, "Gone." 

“Ella,” I say evenly my eyes narrowing, “Go upstairs please.” Ella's mouth opens, and then closes. She grabs Thumbelina's hand and pulls her upstairs. Goldilocks hesitates and then follows them. 

"What did you do?" I ask her, my voice cold. 

"You won't find them Jack, not ever." She stands up and leans over the table to pick up the freshly brewed tea pot.

“Where. Are. They?” I repeat.

She pours herself some tea. “Tea?” She asks with a sickening smile, “Suit yourself,” She shrugs and sits down, “I always take sugar in my tea, would you fetch some for me?”

I don’t move. I stare at her and then the words come out before I know what I’m saying, “Why do you hate us?”

She smiles and her dark lashes flutter, “Whatever gave you that idea…son?”

I have no words, I just stare at her. My brain doesn’t seem to work. I cannot understand her, I’ll never understand her. There are some people that make no logical sense. Why would tormenting me make her look-gleeful? What was it about us that she hated so much? And perhaps Ella’s not all wrong, maybe she hates us so much and can’t stand the sight of us so that she is more miserable than we are.

“Why did you do it? Ella and I, we’re older, but Hansel’s four and Gretel’s a baby, why would you do that?”

“They’re probably dead already Jack,” She says harshly.

“I hate you!” I scream

“It doesn’t matter, I did what I had to do,” She says quietly.

“What! What did you have to do!” I shout my eyes wet with fear that my siblings are dead already.

I have failed, I promised myself that I would protect them the way father and mother protected me, and I failed. I am a failure. A failure.

“He wanted them,” She swallows, “You’ll understand someday when you have children of your own. But I must buy as much time from him as he will allow.”

“Who? Who!”

“The little man,” She whispers, “I can’t say his name Jack, or he’ll know. I needed to buy my own child some time.”

“What?” I ask confused, “What do you mean?”

“I’ve already said too much, I hope you find them, I really do.”

“And I hope that someday someone takes everything from you just like you took everything from me.” I pronounce every syllable in every word. Her face goes white and she falls silent.

Her teacup sits in front of her, full to the brim and she stares forward, empty and blank like a ghost. After what feels like a very long moment she whispers, “You should at least have supper before you leave Jack.”

I blink at her and shake my head. I turn and walk up the stairs and into the little attic room with so many happy memories to leave behind.

Ella sits on the bed, she strokes Lina's hair. I grab my clothes and quickly stuff them into a sack. "Where are you going?" Ella asks, Lina sits up.

"To find them," I say slinging the sack over my shoulder, "Are you coming?" 

"Be careful Jack," Ella whispers. 

I nod. Thumbelina jumps off the bed and runs to me, "You're not leaving us are you? You're my best friend in the whole world! I wanna go with you! I can help! I can help you find them! Can I come with you please? Please!" 

I kneel down so I'm eye level with her, "Hey, it's okay; I promise I'll come visit you." 

"Promise?" She whispers. 

"I promise," I say and pull her into a hug. I hug Ella next. 

"I love you," She whispers in my ear. 

"Same," I whisper back. I let her go and walk down the stairs. 

Mrs. Diamond sits alone at the table eating dinner. I don't look at her as I walk past. 

“I’m sorry Jack, if you only knew I-” She trails off distantly. I don’t turn around and I don’t stop walking. I open the door and shut it on the mother I never wanted.

My life feels like it is finally beginning and I'm meant for great things.