It’s been two hours, and we’re still staying in this position. This beast really has no mercy.
“L-Let’s change the position. My legs are started to numb, I’m tired.”
I didn’t expect anything since he always ignored me when I begged him, but now, it seems to be different.
He stopped. He pulled out his d*ck and stared at my hole for a while. Then, he smirked.
“You know what? Your hole is incredible.”
Iori closer his face onto mine. He sniffed my neck, took a deep breath.
I widened my eyes when I felt sharp things touched my skin.
“No, stop!” I covered my neck immediately with my hand and stay away from him. “You aren’t in your right mind! You’re gonna mark me, stupid!”
He didn’t say anything. While looking at me with his gold eyes, slowly, he’s crawling towards me.
I can’t move anywhere, since what’s on my back right now is a dead end. I closed my eyes tight, while my hand is still on my neck.
There’s a sound of a hand banging on the wall right next to me. I flinched and opened my eyes immediately. His face is the first thing I see. It’s already so close to me. I can feel his glare pierced through my soul, as if he’s seeing inside of me.
“Can’t I?”
I bit my lower lip to calm myself. “C-Can’t what?”
Iori’s hand gets down, stroking my ear. “Mark you.”
I hold his hand tightly, stopping him from stroking my ear. “No! You can’t!”
“Why?” He answered so fast, to the point it feels intimidating.
I can’t stop the tremble on my body. I’m so scared right now.
“Because … a mark is … once for eternity. Once you mark your partner, you’ll be together forever with them. You can’t get close to anyone besides them, you’ll get sick if you still do that, and you can’t remove it no matter what.”
I can’t endure it anymore. Tears started to fall out of my eyes.
“If you mark a person, it means that you’re willing to spend the rest of your life sticking like a glue with them. The mark won’t go off, except if you or your partner die. That’s why … you should only mark the person that you love and loves you.”
I’m holding tightly onto the pillow. The sound of me crying filled this silent room. I don’t really understand why, but I’m feeling so sad right now.
Suddenly, his hand touched my cheek, wiped the tears off my face. “Why are you crying? Don’t cry.”
His hand feels so soft, it calmed me down. Raised my head, I’m accidentally looking at the clock.
Tue, May 30, 20xx
We’ve been doing it a whole week! So that means, his rut is almost over. No wonder, his pheromones aren’t that strong anymore.
“What are you looking at?”
Iori’s hands grabbed my cheeks and forced me to face him. When I looked at him, one of his eyes is started to back to normal.
“Iori …,” I touched his face, stroking his eye. “Are you—”
“But you said you love me, didn’t you?”
“Huh?”
My hand stopped the moment I heard it. What was it? What does he mean?
“You said you love me, so why can’t I mark you?”
My hands clenched. It hurts, hearing it from him. I know I shouldn’t be mad at him, since he doesn’t really understand about this kind of thing. Since he’s not a real Alpha from the beginning, it’s not his fault. However, still ....
“I do love you, but … it’s just me ….”
I finally burst, crying and screaming desperately. It’s really hurt, even though I can’t put the blame on him.
“Though, I told to myself not to love an Alpha ever again! I told to myself that once is enough, I don’t need them anymore! I can live my life without them! But why … why are you so kind, even though you don’t love me? Because of the debt? Is that it?”
I punched him while yelling. I’ve never been this desperate before. Even when Haruto destroyed my life, it didn’t feel this hurtful.
Iori didn’t say anything. He just fell silent, and slowly brought me into his arms. He rubbed my back gently, even though I’m still punching him badly.
When I finally calmed down, Iori collapsed. He fainted while still hugging me.
I put him onto the bed. With a smile, I kissed his forehead and closed my eyes too.
“Sleep tight.”
No, it’s not the right time to sleep. I almost forgot that he didn’t use any condoms this whole week. I should quickly get it out and take the medicine.
Enter the bathroom, I see the reflection of my body in the mirror. I sighed. A lot of hickeys adorned my whole body.
For now, I should ignore it. I’m going to clean this thing first.
***
“Yes, my house like usual. I can’t go right now, my body won’t hear me, hahaha.”
I’ve already taken the medicine, and now are speaking with my old friend. He’s my senpai, a doctor. He became my private doctor for quite a long time. All those suppressants, I got it from him.
The call ended with his sigh. More and less he knows about my love life. After all, he’s the one who handled me when I got a miscarriage.
I opened the door when the bell rang. “Eh, it’s fast.”
“Shut up.” He helped me walk to the couch.
I told him everything that happened in this week.
He sighed. “So you fainted for a long time that you didn’t even know what was actually happened, and he didn’t use condoms at all?”
I nodded. “But I’ve taken the med already.”
He pinched the bridge of his nose. “It’s still dangerous, you punk! Surely, he didn’t knot you, right?”
I fell silent for a while, trying to remember. “It doesn’t hurt that much, so I don’t think he did that.”
While he’s busy with his prescription, I’m walking to the kitchen to make tea for us.
“Riku, he’s gonna be sleeping for at least three days. In those times, don’t go anywhere and focus on your recovery. Don’t overwork, just rest.”
I drink the tea while looking at the medicines that he placed on the table. “I can’t go to work?”
“No.”
I sighed. However, it might be a right choice. Since Iori is in a deep sleep, I should watch over him too.
We fell silent after he finished explaining what I should do for the time being. Daydreaming while drinking a tea, his sudden question startled me.
“So … what is it, this time? Why do you finally fall for an Alpha again?”
I placed the tea back on the table and smiled. “I wonder too. I don’t even know when, but the moment I realized it, I know that I can’t deny it anymore.”
He looked me in the eye. “Then, do you planned to—”
“No, it’s unrequited. He’s only kind to me because he feels indebted. Moreover, I don’t plan on having a serious relationship again. Like I said, once is enough.”
Senpai tidied up his stuff. “Are you sure?”
I took the medicines he gave me. “Mm-hm. I’m satisfied enough, as long as I can see him. For me, love doesn't always need a reply. He doesn’t need to love me back. Besides that, I can love him silently.”
Senpai stretched up his body, drinking the tea, then sighed.
“Unrequited love is hard, Riku. Also, you don’t know if he’s a good person or not. Don’t fall too easily, or else you’ll be the one who get hurt.”
I fell silent, thinking about his words. Senpai is right. I haven’t even know Iori that much yet. He is still too mysterious. For me, he should be no other than a weirdo stranger that suddenly turned to be my roommate.
Looking back, I didn’t understand why I agreed to help him that easily. He looked like a poor stray cat who just lost its way to its house. It might be because I took a sympathy over him, but the more I know him, the weirder it gets.
Even until now, I won’t say that I’ve already believed him. I just don’t want to think about it, because at the end, I’ve fallen for him, and there’s no way to turn back. Either he is lying or not, I don’t care anymore. Let the God knows it and saved it all as their secret.
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