Dad’s car was already in the driveway when I got home, so I did my best to shove today’s events from my mind before I pushed open the door.

“Hey kiddo,” he greeted from the kitchen, in the midst of unloading his empty containers from his lunch bag. 

“Hey,” I replied before dropping my bag on the dining table and ducking past him to the fridge to grab a slice of last night’s pizza.

“How’d you get home? I didn’t see Lottie’s car,” he then pried as I munched on the cold joy.

I winced slightly at the fact he had noticed, but was quick to fill the silence with a lie. “Her car broke down not far from here so I walked.”

“And you just left her?” he pivoted on his foot, reaching for his keys as he already started to assume the worst of me.

“No. Of course not. I left when the roadside assistance people showed up.”

“They couldn’t give you a ride home?”

I shook my head, hating how convoluted this lie was now getting. “It was one of those two-seater utes. Besides, we weren’t far. The fresh air did me good.”

His face relaxed and he turned to face the sink, starting to fill it with hot water and detergent. 

And I’m safe…

I breathed an internal sigh of relief and continued to enjoy my pizza, thinking the eye of the storm had passed. That this evening would be a welcomed break from the drama that was him, giving me time to calm myself in preparation for Lottie’s unavoidable interrogation tomorrow.

Until, of course, my twelve-year-old brother, Archie, came racing into the kitchen, iPad in his grips with a picture taking up most of the screen space. “Did you hear?” he shouted with unbridled joy. “Frazer is in town!” He waved the iPad around, Frazer’s face demanding our attention.

My dad froze for a second, before his gaze turned to me. I could tell from the concern that this wasn’t news to him, meaning he was waiting for me to bring it up first.

“Who?” I muttered back before I turned away from my brother to hide my real reaction. Great. Not even home is safe from the mention of him.

“Um, Frazer?” my brother repeated, all the while my dad washed the suds off his hands and turned to interrupt the conversation. “Used to live next door? Went to your school? Oh, most importantly, you two—”

“I’m afraid I’ve never heard of him.”

Archie went to say something more, but dad put his hand on his shoulder just as I walked past them, down the hallway and to my room. 

After closing the door, my father and brother’s voices echoed through the walls. “You know he’s a sensitive topic, mate.”

“But I liked him.”

“Me too. But who do you like more? Your sister or Frazer? Because I pick your sister.”

“Of course I like Em more. But I don’t get why that means we can’t talk about him.”

“Because he hurt her, Arch. And bringing him up causes her to remember what he did. So if we don’t want her to hurt anymore, we need to pretend he didn’t exist. It’s what she needs right now. It won’t be forever, just until the wounds have healed.”

Archie let out a sigh. “Okay. Do you think she will feel better if I do the dishes after dinner?”

“You know what? I think that’s a great way to cheer her up.”

◁ㅤ ❚❚ ㅤ▷ 

“Don’t feel like walking today?” Lottie quipped as I climbed into the passenger seat of her car.

“Nah. My legs are tired from yesterday,” I feigned ignorance, as if my jumping out of her car yesterday was merely part of a new exercise regime and not the beginnings of a panic attack.

“Convenient. Well, I hope you don’t mind if I put some music on.” Then she pressed the CD button, the car taking a few moments before the track loaded mid-song.

“I wanted to say | You look good tonight, no | You look beautiful, no | You’re a shining star | And when you’re in a room all I see is you.”

“Seriously?” I deadpanned as the familiar voice filled the car.

“You are all I need.”

“What?” she pressed.

“You’re everything to me.”

“If you don’t want to drive me to uni, just say so. I’ll get the bus.” I started to unbuckle my seatbelt. 

“I hope you never leave.”

But Lottie put the car into drive and took off before I could exit the vehicle. “Who said I didn’t want to drive you?”

“But most importantly, I- I- I-”

“Then why are you playing—”

“Apollo? Because I really love his album.”

“Oh please don’t mess this up, I- | I better get this right, I- | There’s so much to lose.”

The lyrics continued to consume the car, and with it flashes of him. His long locks framing his face. His eyes turned down as he plucked at his guitar. A glance up at me, small smile stealing his face as our gazes met before he sang my favourite line.

“Lottie, please,” I mumbled as my heart started to sear.

“But know I am f—”

She didn’t change over to the radio, nor did she eject his CD. But she did turn the volume all the way down to zero as we pulled up at a traffic light, all the while casting me a wary glare. “Spill before I turn the music up as loud as it goes.”

“Spill what?” I asked, frustrated.

“Why can’t you stand listening to Apollo?”

“Because his voice is like nails on a chalk—”

“Bullshit. You two have beef.”

“We don’t have beef. To have beef I’d have to know him, and I don’t have a clue who he is. I told you. He is a stranger to me.”

“Is… but not was. Interesting tense choices.”

“Why are you getting caught up on semantics?”

“Because I know you hate lying, which is why you’re dancing around the truth using careful diction. You don’t know who he is now and that makes him a stranger to you, present tense. But that doesn’t mean you didn’t know him in the past. You did know Frazer back in school, didn’t you?”

I knew there was no dodging her direct question this time, so I mumbled, “I guess.”

“And did you know him well?”

I barked a laugh. “Define well.”

“Hmm. Interesting.”

“What’s interesting?”

“This is the first time you’re not quick to divulge information, which is uncommon for you. Meaning he did something pretty bad for you to avoid it.”

“Maybe there’s no information to give you.”

“Unlikely. So what was it? Did he bully you? Was he a drug dealer? Oh my gosh, do you have a delicious scoop on him that we could publish to get us heaps of clicks?”

“No, no, and no. He was just… that guy who sang songs, won a competition, and then… moved away without looking back.”

“Interesting…”

“You said that already.”

But she was shaking her head. “You will blab to me eventually, Em. I will find a way to pull this story out of you.”

“There’s no story.”

“You can keep practising your lying skills on me, but you’ve still got a lot of work to go if you want anyone to believe you.”

◁ㅤ ❚❚ ㅤ▷ 

Lottie had been grilling me almost every moment she had between classes, seeing what information she could pry out of me regarding my connection to Frazer. But I danced around every question with nonanswers, keeping my lips tight and wishing, hoping the past would just disappear.

As we were walking towards the library to kill time before a later class, Felicity spotted us across the grounds and called out to us.

“Emilia! Lottie! Hold up,” she said before rushing across the lawn away from her group of friends.

“What’s up?” Lottie asked, because it wasn’t normal for Felicity to greet us out of the meetings. She was often too busy and focussed on her studies, tutoring, mentoring, and plethora of other odd jobs she had to slow down or mingle with peers. 

“So last night I couldn’t sleep thinking about your pitch,” she said to Lottie.

Oh god no. “I’m just going to wait in the library while you two—” I started to say, hoping I could escape the topic of him again.

But then Felicity said, “No, wait. This concerns you.”

What does that mean? 

“Anyway, I decided to put out some feelers and do a cold call, per se, by messaging Frazer Young on his Insta.”

I don’t like where this is going.

“And?” Lottie pressed, eyebrows raised as if she didn’t expect Felicity to take such initiative.

“Well, I totally thought my message would get lost in the spam he would evidently get. But he replied like an hour later.”

“He what?” Lottie exclaimed.

Though my heart started pounding. “What did you tell him?” I demanded, earning a curious glance from Lottie at the fact I had inserted myself in the conversation.

Felicity also shot me a coy smile… almost as if she knew why I was asking. “Oh, just the usual. I’m the Editor of Endeavour University’s news outlet. That we are interested in interviewing him and working together on other potential marketing opportunities. If he’s interested, I’d love to arrange a time to discuss.”

“And? What did he say?” Lottie implored.

“That he’d most certainly be interested…” her eyes flickered my way before she said the next part, “If Emilia McClure were to conduct the interview.”