No longer Ani, Princess Helene of the Ravenian Kingdom composed her startled expression and turned to find Edward Rainer — the eldest son of the Marquess of Theolos — staring at her in question.
“Ah, Lord Edward,” she greeted calmly, thickening her Ravenian accent.
A tall, lean man with golden hair and green eyes, Edward was a striking noble. But, the kindness in his demeanor only drew her walls up as he casually walked over to where she stood with the brown stallion.
“I see you’ve acquainted yourself with good, old Toffee here,” he started, petting the horse affectionately on the back.
Helene swallowed the lump in her throat. “Is that his name? I’ve been calling him Handsome all this time.”
Edward laughed heartily. “Well, he definitely lives up to the name. I’m sure he doesn’t mind.”
She turned the corners of her mouth politely, trying to smile but impatient to slip away without any questioning.
“May I ask what brings you out here this late, Your Highness?”
Of course it wouldn’t be that easy. “I couldn’t find sleep and was hoping a ride would help me find it. It was an oversight on my part — taking Toffee out without asking.”
“Not at all,” he supplied amiably. “Seeing how worn out he is, I assume your long journey was pleasant enough to ease your insomnia?”
Helene raised her chin. “It was just a simple trek around the woods.”
Edward smiled at the ground as if her answer amused him. “It’s a shame we didn’t run into each other. There’s a lake just a few miles west of here that always calms my mind when it won’t stop running.”
Helene froze, now noticing his attire. Dressed in riding breeches and a heavy cloak, it was clear that he was out in the dead of night as well. “Yes, quite a shame we didn’t,” she coolly replied, never breaking contact with his sharp eyes. “Well, I should return—”
“I know you must be feeling unsettled about the engagement,” he interrupted.
“Pardon?”
Edward grimaced, clutching his hands behind his back. “Your betrothal to the Prince. I’m sure engaging yourself to a stranger isn’t an easy burden to bear.”
She simply stared back, perplexed by his sudden empathy. “I will do what is required of me,” she replied practically.
Edward gave a sad smile. “Please know that Prince Alexander is a good man. One of the best I’ve ever known, in fact.”
“I’m sure he’s lovely,” Helene blankly acknowledged. “But it’s not the prospect of marrying your Prince that I despise. It’s losing the freedom to choose that’s keeping me up at night.”
Pressing his lips together, Edward nodded. “Freedom is a strange concept for people like us, isn’t it?”
People like us.
As the daughter of a King, he would assume she was raised with the stifling customs all royals and nobles were bound to, but that was far from the truth. Because she wasn’t born a Princess.
“We have the wealth, the power, the privilege. In the eyes of the world, we have nothing left to want, yet I can’t help but think we’re captives to the very thing that most people envy. And, as captives, there can never be true freedom. It makes me resent the station of my birth at my lowest moments,” he continued.
“Most people would kill to have a taste of our comfort,” she muttered softly. “And they would scorn you for thinking the way you do as you stand there dressed in a warmth some families will never know.”
A faint blush touched his cheeks at her words. “You convict me of my ignorance. Thank you,” he bowed his head.
“No, I don’t mean to convict you. I simply mean to say we can never be satisfied. There will always be something better, something freer than what we hold.”
Edward stood, speechless, and a new tension hung in the air.
“I apologize, Lord Edward. I didn’t mean to —”
“You have an enlightened mind,” he said with a pleased expression. “It will serve you well as the future Empress of Theolos.”
She narrowed her eyes.
He laughed in good nature. “I say that with utmost sincerity.”
Strangely feeling self-conscious, Helene turned away and directed her attention to the waiting stallion, who she could have sworn held an exasperated look in his large, brown eyes. “I believe Toffee is fairly upset with me for keeping him out for so long,” she evaded. “I will take him back to his stalls and make my way back to the manor. Thank you for your discretion.”
With a brief nod of dismissal, she gently tugged on Toffee’s reins to lead him back to the warmth of the waiting stables. It wasn’t until she heard the following footsteps that she determined the young lord to be an oblivious fellow.
As he fell into step with her and chivalrously opened the gate, he mentioned with a smirk, “My father would have my hide if I failed to escort a lady back safely to her chambers.”
Helene had faced numerous challenges throughout the course of her eventful night, yet the most arduous thing she found of all was holding back an eye roll. The lengths she would go to be left alone right now.
Walking into the stables, she wordlessly unsaddled the tired horse. Throughout it all, she felt Edward’s observant gaze on her. It wasn’t one of male interest or appreciation. Instead, the way he followed her movements felt like an assessment — as if he was trying to sift through the layers of her well-hidden character and find the truth of her intentions.
“You said you believed there can never be true freedom for people like us,” she interrupted the silence, hoping to direct his attention elsewhere.
“Not exactly. I still believe there are ways to find it,” he said thoughtfully.
Helene smoothly exited the quiet stables once she was satisfied with Toffee’s comfort and allowed Lord Edward to accompany her back to the manor. “What is true freedom to you, then?”
He glanced at her from the side, his green eyes twinkling as the chill breeze blew strands of his long hair across his face. “True freedom is when the darkest parts of yourself are found.”
She stopped in her tracks. “What?”
He turned to look at her. “If we can’t find it in worldly matters, we can find it in acceptance.”
Her heartbeats picked up as his words rang in her mind.
He went on. “I believe if there’s at least one person in this world that knows you for who you really are — and I mean knows the deepest, darkest parts of your soul and still chooses to stand by you — that’s when you have true freedom.”
Helene stared absently at him. “You’re wrong,” she murmured in an empty voice, looking away and continuing her steps.
“How so?” he asked with genuine curiosity, quickening his stride to catch up with her.
“What you speak of isn’t freedom…it’s condemnation.”
They reached the marble stairwell leading up to the front door, and she began to ascend. But Edward didn’t move with her.
“What makes you think that?” he asked in fascination.
Standing a few steps above, she turned to look down at him with an emotionless face. “Would you condemn that ‘one person’ to endure the extent of your sins with you? Isn’t that too cruel a fate for them?”
Edward tilted his head, watching her with unreadable eyes. Before he could respond, however, Helene straightened, giving him a polite, stiff smile. “Thank you for your escort, Lord Edward. Good night.”
With that, she promptly walked up the remaining steps, ignoring the feel of his bemused stare on her retreating back, and entered the warmth of the residence. This time, he didn’t follow.
Swiftly making her way through the impressive estate, Helene internally chided her foolish mouth. She was a guest in the Rainer home as a foreign Princess set to embark for the Imperial Palace in the morning, and already she had been caught in her escapade and was now spouting nonsense in the company of the Marquess’s eldest son and heir.
Attempting to shun the strange weight on her chest, she found herself outside her guest chambers, where one of her ladies was pacing outside the door. As soon as their eyes met, the young girl called Wendy — if she recalled correctly — squeaked in relief and scurried over.
“Your Highness! You cannot just disappear like that! And in the middle of the night, without a word at all, how could you —”
“I’m sorry, Wendy. I am back unharmed and will now be getting myself to bed,” she offered with a gentle pat on her heaving shoulders.
As Helene opened the door, Wendy started sputtering fast words she could barely understand, and it wasn’t until she saw a shadow in the corner of the room that she realized they weren’t alone.
Seated on a velvet divan and balancing a bundle of letters over the flickering flame of a candle, Princess Morgan, the eldest daughter of King Frederick of Ravenia and Helene’s half-sister, looked up with a sneer.
“Darling baby sister, what twisted scheme are you conspiring now?”
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