I give my mom and dad a call as I tell them about this new update. I also inform them about the exit interview, I tell them about my last paycheck, and every other detail that they want to know. Mom, of course, is quick to tell me not to waste this week and to make sure I take care of myself. Dad is much more excited at the opportunities I have, where he tells me all the shows and movies I can watch. He also tells me I should go to a spa, which is not a half bad idea. 

Mom throws me a curveball as we are talking together. "You should do something with Charlotte. When was the last time you called her? When was the last time you did something together? You should make time with her this week, Lucy. Have you even told her this?"

Mom continues to rant about how terrible I am at communicating and updating people like how I didn't tell grandma that I didn't get this new job as a social media manager after two days of my parents knowing. I ignore her antics, but I think about what she says about Charlotte. She has been beside me since I was a freshman in college. Literally beside me since our dorms were right next to each other. Talk about destiny.

Charlotte has been beside me through everything big to everything small. From the time we stayed up until midnight, writing a 10 page paper that we should have worked on sooner to the time we graduated college. When I called her crying on the phone over a book at two in the morning and when we got our first big girl jobs. She was there when Jack and I reunited when he was 25 and I was 23 and when we got married. Even when Jack got killed in the car crash up till today, Charlotte has been there.

Things were hard when I was setting off on my own because I moved closer to Charlotte, so we could be together more, and I could show her how well I was doing. That back-fired.

Up until my breakdown, I was rarely texting her back or answering her calls. It wasn't until I was in therapy that Jennifer suggested I bring Charlotte with me. I was terrified of the idea, so I kept saying no until I realized I was keeping Charlotte further and further away from me. About two months in, I decided to ask Charlotte if she wanted to come. She said yes immediately, and we came in together. Jennifer didn't say a word, and all of a sudden, Charlotte and I were on an island.

I cried as I told Charlotte how ashamed I was that I was not okay, and I didn't want her to go through everything again when Jack died. I told her I didn't want to keep her away, but I felt so much like a burden. I wanted to be a better friend for her than I was. Charlotte was crying and yelling as she told me that I didn't get to decide that for her. Our friendship was nearly 15 years old, and it could take everything I was going through. That she could handle me at my worst, but she couldn't not have me in her life.

Of course, we just cried and cried during that session, expressing our love of one another and how things were going to be different. We were going to grow our friendship, and our foundation was not shaken. We were just rebuilding.

Since then, I've made sure to respond quickly to all calls and texts. I call her quite often myself, but we still haven't seen much of each other since the therapy appointment. Part of the problem, I think, is that we are both afraid that things might shatter. Things we don't see, things we don't talk about.

But mom is right. I really should call Charlotte, and we should do something together!

I cut my mom off as she is telling me about the new deal on cabbages at the grocery store, "Okay, mom, that's great, but I have to go. I really should call Charlotte, so I'll talk to you again soon."

"Well, why didn't you say sooner? Yes, go, go, go. Love you, Lucy!"

"Love you, mom."

I search through my recent calls, and I find Charlotte's number from two days ago. We were talking about her work that day, and she told me how she was thinking of fostering kittens. Six to be exact.

I smile as I click the dial button, bringing the phone to my ear as I sit on my couch and stare out the window. The tiny trees in the lawn dance in the wind as I see a young mom with her son in a stroller, going over bumps as they laugh to themselves. I see a little girl, skipping on the sidewalk as she stops in front of a dandelion, which she thrusts into her father's hand, shouting "Make a wish, make a wish." The dandelion withers as they both smile at each other, sharing in a secret wish that no one knows except him.

I hear the sound of hello reach my ear as I see Charlotte answered the phone.

"Hey, how are you doing? Is this a bad time? I know you're working, but I wanted to call you."

She scoffs as she responds back, "Honey, it is never a bad time when you call me at work. Plus, I can always pretend you're a customer who is having trouble accessing your email on your computer. SO WHAT YOU NEED TO DO IS," she's cut off by the sound of hushing coming from her coworker, which I assume is Mark.

I laugh as she informs me that this always works.

"Well, I'm glad I can help. So I have some news!"

"Tell me, tell me. Wait, is this about Brad and the exit interview?"

"No, no, that went fine. Over and done with, but I called Sophie afterwards to ask how things are going and because of delays and things, I get a week off! Mom and dad already gave me some ideas about what I should do, but I want to do something with you. Do you want to get dinner? Do you want to go somewhere? Do you want to come over and watch bad movies?"

I wanted to give her a few options to think over, but even though I know she is thinking about what she wants to do, I feel a sense of dread radiating across my body. What if she says no? What if she hates all those ideas? What if she doesn't want to see me?

"Let's get dinner! We should go to that new restaurant that just opened up that's sort of fancy but not. The vibe seems to be such that dads wear jeans but with a blazer."

The laugh that escapes out of me is filled with relief and satisfaction. We're going to dinner!

"What's so funny? That's what I see on all their social media? I checked them OUT!"

My laugh only grows and soon, she's laughing too. Our laughter dissipates into a comfortable silence as I hear the clicking of her keyboard over the phone.

"So when do you want to get dinner?"

"Let's meet for Friday. That'll give me something to look forward to plus I can go all out, where we look our best, and we have the best time."

"Friday sounds good to me!"

"So what will you do for the rest of the week?"

Charlotte's question catches me off guard as I think about what I should do. Of course, mom didn't say anything particular besides getting together with Charlotte, which is already set up. Dad voted on a spa and bingeing on some shows or movies he likes. Not too much to work with currently.

"I'm not sure. The one thing that sounds good so far is going to the spa, which my dad suggested. Getting a massage or a facial. Maybe getting my nails done for summer. Besides that, I haven't thought about what I want to do. I don't want to stay at home the whole time, but I also don't want to do something super extravagant or spend a ton of money throughout the whole week. Any suggestions?"

She makes a very loud and long "hmm" sound that goes on forever. Even when the "hmm" cuts off, she just starts again.

"AH HA! I got a few ideas. Okay, one. What if you go hiking?"

"Charlotte, I have not gone hiking in years. I don't think my body could handle that right now. Next option."

"Fine, fine. What if you cooked? You said you wanted to make some new recipes."

"That is true. That's true. I should do that. But what's something that I can do to go out?"

"Why not go to the library? Pick up some books, DVDs. You could take the book with you to a cafe or something."

"Charlotte, you're a genius!"

Charlotte begins to flatter herself as she talks about how smart and amazing she is, but I'm so happy she suggested that. It's been years since I've read, where even before Jack died, I was in a reading slump. After he died, I tried reading since it was something I enjoyed so much, but it was just so exhausting. Reading felt so heavy, and it never felt like that before. I decided to stop trying to read again, which was about three years ago.

"I'll make sure to pick up lots of books, and I'll tell you all about them on Friday!"

Charlotte doesn't answer me for a while, but I can hear her breathing on the phone. I can imagine she is smiling at her computer as if she is a kid on Christmas. Her voice comes out like a whisper, "Yeah, tell me all about it when I see you. I love you, Lucy."

"I love you too," I whisper back.